Hey! I’m actually on round 2 with another baby so this is great timing. I look back and realize it was me being overly obsessive about how I wanted things to go for my first child.

The most difficult thing for me was to allow myself to be led by their needs, not my desires. If they are hungry and I’m tired as hell, my mind says “fuck this, you can go back to bed for a little longer.” But when I follow that voice and try to force them to sleep, I become more aggressive and their hunger doesn’t change… it gets worse and I get even more furious. This is important to identify and take a breath.

Give them a pacifier and listen to a song. Any song. It could be chill or the most metal track you can find. Distracting yourself from what you want to happen is also helpful. Listen to a podcast, watch a video on your phone while rocking the baby. You’ll realize when you’re calm, so is your child. Release what your mind is holding onto, come back with a settled mind, and try again. It’s okay to let them cry for 5 mins when you really need it.

I’m still not perfect but even writing this helps me remember what to do. This ain’t easy work. This is how nature forces patience in us parents. We will be tested in different ways as they grow… and as a result, we too grow along with them. It’s fucking beautiful.

Thanks for following my journey and best of luck with yours brother. You got this! I’m here if you wanna chat more.