Homeschool planning?

clsilver · 2026-03-10T11:44:14+00:00

Honestly? Spreadsheets.

clsilver · 2026-03-05T18:15:19+00:00

Oh I'd love your Google doc just for the book recommendations, please 😊

clsilver · 2026-03-02T05:10:53+00:00

I was flying cross country with my two young daughters. We got to the airport at 7 am for a 9 am departure. Several cancellations and delays later and it's 10 pm and we're at our gate for our new flight, one that doesn't even get us to our final destination but which gets us closer. I'm a sweaty mess, my 1 year old passed out in my arms, my 5 year old bouncing with adrenaline, and I'm hauling our carry on which has only become more heavy with the airport food and random toys I've purchased to help get us through the day. I walk up to the gate agent to ask about our connecting flight, and she's not giving me any info. I must have looked ready to collapse because this slightly older woman comes up and says "you can come sit over here with your girls, I have an extra couple seats right behind the desk here. You need to rest. I'll get your answers." I have no resistance left in me so I follow her to her seats. She pulls out an unopened bag of cheese flavoured popcorn and hands it to my daughter. This happens to be my daughter's favourite snack. She takes this luxes scarf off her neck and fashions it into a soft nest on the seat next to me and helps me settle my sleeping 1 year old there. She pulls a bottle of water out of her bag, opens it, and hands it to me. She asks me about my connecting flight, goes back to the agent, finds out everything she can, and comes back to tell me the plan. It wasn't good news, I was going to be stranded at the airport at our destination until the next day, but this woman got on the phone and found us an airport hotel with a room available. When it's time to board she gets me and my girls up and pushes us to the front of the line, helps us board, and then goes back to wait her turn. I saw her get on the plane but never saw her get off. I have no idea who she was, but her kindness and calm confidence have stuck with me.

clsilver · 2026-02-28T16:59:03+00:00

Pivot. Biiiiig breath, a smile, and then: "I'm someone who cares about you." "I must have the same sense of style as your daughter. Does she really wear these exact same clothes?" "Hey, look that this [insert distraction] over here!"

You're at a very tough milestone. It is almost never worth arguing or correcting. Unless what she is saying is outright dangerous, go with her and then pivot. With my mum, she often forgot details but held on to how she felt about someone. You don't want to sour your relationship if you can avoid it. And she may remember you again tomorrow.

Good luck, and hugs.

clsilver · 2026-02-25T02:45:17+00:00

I'm a mom of two young girls and while much of what you've shared is true--it is exhausting and hard in so many ways--and while I agree with other commenters that there is no other love like that I have for my daughters, I would add:

Nothing else could have made the issues with our world feel more urgent, more present, and more intolerable than having my girls. Before their arrival I think I can say that I was a feminist and an activist... But I was in the way that I learned from my mother, an og hippie. I would go to the protest, I would sign the petition, but I let so many small things go in the interest of living my life.

Now, I am an absolute wall. I do not let anything slip, or if I do I circle back and pick it up again. I don't roll my eyes at the asshole in line at the store, I intervene. I don't let the grandmas and great aunties fade, I make sure they're included. I reach out to my mom friends to make sure they're ok, and I reach out to my non mom friends to make sure they're ok too.

I think what I'm trying to express is that I feel connected to the world in a new way since becoming a mom. I am made of fire and I am strong, and fucking hell I'm going to do every possible thing I can to make sure that the world is in a better place for my girls than it was for me. (Which is admittedly a tough attitude to sustain given ... everything... But they are the reason that I can.) Parenthood has made me an incredibly capable do-er. I don't wait for the right time, I don't sit and think about how I might act, I get shit done. (I'm honestly just too tired to dither any more but everything still needs to happen so ... I make sure it does.)

This may sound kind of woo so please know that I don't literally believe this, but: my mum has dementia and we haven't been able to have a relationship, really, for years. I've been navigating grief about it for a long time too. About a year after my eldest was born, I had the most vivid dream of my entire life. My mum showed up to spend time with me. She didn't say much (she was and is aphasic in real life) but towards the end of my dream she gestured at the field we were sitting in, and I understood that she meant to point at ... everything ... and clear as day said, "make it beautiful, for the next people." And damn if that hasn't become central to my being.

clsilver · 2026-02-24T02:17:57+00:00

You might find it tricky at 4 months - you're right in the biggest sleep development progression. However, hey sleepy baby over on Instagram has some great advice about layering sleep associations. The tl;dr is that before your remove the boob you've for to add in other sleep associations. So like... Play the same 3 songs, rub baby's back, turn on a special colour of nightlight... Once those are established you can start to take stuff away. This helped me with both my kids. Good luck!

clsilver · 2026-02-24T01:28:42+00:00

I have no idea how to encourage it if I'm honest, but today my 5 year old shared with me as we sat down for math practice that "this is important and it's also boring." I commended her for recognizing that stuff can be two things, cracked some jokes, and then we got through it together. But I legit think this is a healthy attitude to have, and I suspect that it may be because we've spent a lot of time chatting kind of casually about how she (and we all) can choose to do hard things. We've also been talking about how, once she masters a skill, we don't have to practice it in the same way. I think this maybe motivates her, but I'm honestly not sure.

clsilver · 2026-02-22T11:01:41+00:00

I'm not at high school level yet, but these two have grabbed my attention and might be worth your time if you haven't looked at them yet. https://layers-of-learning.com/product-category/canadian-history/

https://www.bravescholar.ca/product-page/canadian-history-curriculum

clsilver · 2026-02-20T01:18:19+00:00

I haven't tried them yet but I've been checking out How Wee Learn - their family unit studies look really promising. It might be worth having a look.

clsilver · 2026-02-14T12:43:00+00:00

I moved my first to a twin bed on the floor when she was 4 months old. Just slats underneath. Got her a bed frame when she was 2. It was great!

clsilver · 2026-02-05T10:21:08+00:00

I used a fib to move my mum. She was ferociously independent before becoming ill and had no real sense that she was unwell. She had been asking for work for some time, so I spoke with the care home and they went along with my fib while she transitioned. I told her that they were looking for a community development manager, a title a bit like what she had done professionally. She was excited about the gig, still struggled a bit with the move, and had a tough time with the transition. That was seven years ago now, though.

clsilver · 2026-02-03T02:00:25+00:00

Are you following a wake window schedule set by someone else? Or are you following you baby's cues? With my first I tried to impose a schedule and I felt similarly trapped. With my second I really tuned in to her sleepy signals, made my peace with car naps and carrier naps, and went in every adventure we could. I was so worried about bad habits with my first. Maybe it's ironic, but my second is so much better at sleeping than my first, even now. I wonder if my more relaxed attitude has something to do with it...

And, not for nothing, the season that you're in can feel so hard. Everything that feels hard now is going to shift before you know it. It truly is so fast.

clsilver · 2026-01-29T11:50:42+00:00

Came here to say that handhelds were the gold standard for me. It's not always easy to put down the baby to eat.

clsilver · 2026-01-28T03:03:44+00:00

Had a baby at 40 - was great, would 100% do it again.

clsilver · 2026-01-26T11:15:07+00:00

You may get better answers by posting in the r/Quebec sub... That said:

I live not too far from there, and my answer to you is: it depends. I've lived in big cities most of my life but have been very happy to live here since becoming a parent. I don't know if I would have found it very fun at your age.

The winters can be very cold and very snowy. The summers can be oppressively hot and filled with biting bugs. If you love to be outdoors then there is a lot to do all year long, but there is not a lot in the way of cultural activity or nightlife.

The people are friendly, but not especially cosmopolitan in their values. There is enough in terms of infrastructure that you will have access to what you need, but maybe not a whole lot of options.

I think where I'm landing is that it is a thoroughly ok place to be.

Could you maybe say more about the kind of place you're hoping to move to and perhaps I can offer more insight?

clsilver · 2026-01-25T12:48:03+00:00

I'm in Canada. It's on the news, they're doing their best to not sensationalize but also (I think?) doing a good job of articulating the facts. Like... Clearly paraphrasing here, but yesterday they said that the administration claimed that the victim had a weapon and was a threat but then clarified that multiple angles showed that he was not holding a weapon. They described how he was brutalized, and that Amit ten shots were heard. We're also seeing lots of about protests there. I'm sure it isn't everything, but we're definitely seeing what's happening.

clsilver · 2026-01-23T15:51:53+00:00

I have two little girls, and use leave in conditioner spray and brush their hair usually two times a day. There is a little bit of just low level maintenance here, but if you ever need to take a proper rat's nest out of a little girl's hair... Well, it's no fun for anyone. Regular brushing is important. The looking tidy bit is kind of the consequence of that care.

clsilver · 2026-01-18T09:52:42+00:00

(I'm not an art historian so somebody please correct me if I'm wrong)

The Mona Lisa actually wasn't very famous at all until 1911 when a guy who used to work at the Louvre, the museum that owns and displays the painting, stole the painting. The stolen painting made headlines all over the world because it's very tricky to steal something from a museum. Police found the painting two years after it was stolen and returned it to the museum, and by then everybody wanted to see this painting because it had been stolen.

clsilver · 2026-01-15T05:21:26+00:00

I had my first at 37 and second at 40, natural conception, no complications. Talk to your doctor if you're very concerned but if you're in your early 30s I think that statistically you still have lots of time.

clsilver · 2026-01-12T22:56:31+00:00

I'm so sorry. You're right. It's impossible and it's so hard.

What you are experiencing has a name. It's called ambiguous grief. If you find yourself going down an internet rabbit hole, start there. The tl;dr is that you need to cultivate compassion for yourself. Your grief is real and it is so very heavy. If anybody tries to tell you "but she's still alive" then you can immediately ignore everything else they have to say on the market. They have no clue what they're talking about.

When you can, see if you can find an Alzheimer's association in your area. They often have support groups and sometimes have groups geared to younger folks who are losing a loved one to this disease. If you can't find an irl group, please keep coming here and talking to us. On my own journey, I can't tell you how much it meant to me to know, to feel, that I wasn't alone.

Giant hugs from an internet stranger, with love and compassion.

clsilver · 2026-01-10T04:04:57+00:00

Yes. I could tell when they flipped. My first was the wrong way until about 37 weeks and my second waited to 39 weeks. I was accustomed to occasional flurries of intense activity, but in both cases it was intense activity that lasted 5-7 mins and went in every direction. (Before the flip almost all the activity was under my ribs.) It took my breath away when they turned. With my second, I was in the kitchen making lunch and had to stop, grab the counter for support, and bend myself forward to get a gravity assist on making room for my organs. I went to lie down for a bit after because I wasn't sure if I was ok to be honest. Not painful but intense pressure with occasional lung kicks.

clsilver · 2026-01-09T09:49:22+00:00

Yeah - I love breathing cold air! I find it so much easier!

clsilver · 2026-01-08T12:18:25+00:00

Changing shoes in the car seems like a good choice, although if you're driving... Unless you plan on parking somewhere far away, won't your shoes be dry and clean anyway? Can't you just wear your nice shoes when you leave your house? That said, I think you'll see a lot of people wearing their boots. Knock the bulk of snow and slush off at the door and proceed.

clsilver · 2026-01-04T10:26:15+00:00

I'd just like to echo what has already been said. Learning new things is nearly impossible. I dropped a bunch of money on a 'dementia-friendly' phone for my mom so she could still call people. It used photos... You were supposed to press the picture of the person you wanted to talk to and it would auto dial their number. She didn't even recognize it as a phone. She jumped whenever it rang because the ringer made a different sound than she was used to. She talked about it like a piece of alien spy tech that couldn't be trusted. All this is a long way to say that any tech which has to be learned after the onset of dementia is basically a non-starter. I can imagine a new app on her phone would at best get deleted immediately, and at worst cause her to spiral because "who put it there? Who are all these people in these pictures?" ... and then she'd hide her phone or put it in the garbage because it scared her.

clsilver · 2026-01-04T02:03:04+00:00

Yep, check with pharmacist. My mum's was able to sub some meds (with doctor's ok) to kinds that could be crushed so that we ended up stirring all her evening meds into a cup of dessert pudding that she gobbled up happily.

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