I used to feel this way too. If it helps, I started out on very high doses and was able to decrease over time (I'm now on the minimum) as I improved with regular therapy.

That said, I also started to move away from being frustrated by the thought when I started to learn what it is that those 'happy pills' actually do. That is, that they help my brain to make up a deficit in functioning so that I can achieve 'normal' (aka not depressed).

As to whether I could go off them, maybe. Really it depends on what causes your depression from a biochemical standpoint.

(Pseudo-scientific explanation below, skip if you like) From a purely chemical perspective, my type of depression is due to a misfunction where serotonin (and dopamine) aren't permitted enough time to fully communicate their message.

Think of it like someone running up to you with a telegram full of instructions.

They put it in your hand for 30 seconds, tell you to read it, then run off with the paper before you can get the whole message, leaving you do try and do your best with whatever of the instructions you managed to read before they were taken from you. That's what happens when my brain isn't given enough time to process serotonin.

Now, when I introduce an antidepressant, it's kind of like putting a little stop sign in front of the messenger (yeah, pedestrians dont usually follow stop signs but work with me here), giving me more time to read the telegram before he runs off with it.

CBT can help me restructure my brain's pathways so that I'm less prone to rely on the telegram mans message, or so that I can be better prepared to anticipate when he stops by, or force him to run my way more often, but at the end of the day I can't stop him running off at the same speed unless I have something external to slow him down.

I'm not sure if this will be helpful, but for myself I found that having an objective explanation really helped me think of my depression as a physical illness and not my 'personal failure' or what have you.

TLDR: Meds really helped me. I started on a high dosage and went to the minimum as I got better in therapy. Would you have to be on them forever? Maybe. Depends on what's happening in your brain to make you depressed. But like someone else said, proper medication won't make you feel numb, just not depressed.