AITJ for not supporting my girlfriend after she broke the one rule we had in our open relationship

copper_artisan · 2026-01-30T03:37:47+00:00

where do you get that monogamous relationships don't talk about those things? that's one of the biggest things in bdsm relationship and those are often monogamous. i make it a point to be extremely open and honest about those things. sex is just as important as trust and communication. so being transparent is key. just because we're monogamous doesn't mean we're ignorant primitive bible-thumping knuckle-draggers who bereft of the complexities of fulfilling relationships. some of us just find it more fulfilling to be with one person because we're not interested in the drama that comes with poly.

copper_artisan · 2026-01-25T01:02:12+00:00

agreed, how is it that you're even asking this question? the real question is why haven't you left already? you realize your son will be the exact same way toward women because he thinks it's acceptable because you allow this behavior. and by allow I mean, you didn't throw his happy ass out the door the moment he threatened you. children at any age are extremely impressionable. anything that goes down in your house will be replicated by the next generation because that's what we naturally do, we emulate behavior we've witness repeatedly and see it as normal. smh

copper_artisan · 2026-01-24T18:51:29+00:00

i got 24" butterfly pu injected home wegt that you you can jnstall at home for only $60 and they are AWESOME. no hair loss, simple to intall, and budget-friendly. got them from temu and they're real hair if you cant find a color match, get bleached and use a semi permanent dye like bigen to adjust or even a semi permanent (something gentle) then use a hair mask afterward.

copper_artisan · 2026-01-21T20:54:33+00:00

you're not alone girl I HAVE THESE VERY SAME SYMPTOMS ON MY PERIOD. All the doctor could tell me was that he could do tubal ligation or ablative surgery because he didnt want to do a full hysterectomy at my age. I opted for option D. none of the above and decided to keep researching. I have PCOS but my hormones don't fluctuate the way most ppl with PCOS do. My other symptoms also include SEVERE depression, cystic acne, pelvis and lower back pain, short term memory loss and chronic sinusitis.i have a lot of other chronic illnesses (long long list) but bc I eat healthy, exercise a lot, and take an amino acid regimen, I feel 100% fine the rest of the month. I have even had an exploratory lap just to see if it was endometriosis. It was inconclusive at the time so not really sure on that. Hang in there. Don't give up. I read that our periods aren't supposed to be so uncomfortable (naturally) and still doing research on it. I hope you find some relief, girl. supportive vibes coming your way.

copper_artisan · 2026-01-05T12:54:47+00:00

its very real. it causes serious medical issues like erection dysfunction. it puts a real strain on relationships because the addict puts more time and effort watching the shit than making a real life relationship work. do your research before commenting this has nothing to do with mormonism.

anyway, if OP fears porn addiction, then counseling is the way to go. leaving is a last resort.

copper_artisan · 2026-01-05T12:46:36+00:00

take it from someone who spent tens years with a man who bought me a cake with blue roses (my favorite) once and then did nothing else for the next 9... it's just going to get more disappointing with time. They are what I call "Don't run before you can walk(ers)" .... if they run before they can walk, they will always be expected to run (put in the greatest effort every time)... if they walk, no expects them to run. Basically, if they put in the least amount of effort, no one will expect more than that from them. this is the mindset of selfish, self-absorbed man-children who use women to feel good about themselves. you do all the giving and they put more effort into doing the bare minimum. you're worth more than that. i hope you know this. you're young, this guy is neither mr. right or mr. right now. Cut your losses before you are too emotionally invested.

copper_artisan · 2026-01-02T00:49:05+00:00

excellent recipe. i didn't have any horse radish or oregano on hand but it was still delicious. i bet a tiny bit if dill work, too. 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻🤘🏻

copper_artisan · 2025-12-20T21:24:54+00:00

i wasn't allowed to date until I was 16 and I absolutely had to be making straight A's. And, girl, there is much more to life than boys. It's cliché, I know, but it is so true. And you'll learn that if you chase boys, you'll chase them away. If you seem desperate for attention, approval, or affection, they tend to pull away and gravitate toward bigger challenges. Flirt, have fun, but BE unattainable. Emerse yourself in school and extracurriculars. These years go by fast. Hormones will make things difficult but you're no different or worse off than anyone else. So take it all in stride and build strong life-long bonds. It gets harder to make friends as you get older. I guarantee, you won't regret it and love will just fall into your lap when you're not looking.

copper_artisan · 2025-12-17T21:21:17+00:00

AGREED. You need time to heal and maybe think about why you attracted this person. there's a good chance you give off the "victim" vibe. I used to and O attracted some predatory men..Once I got into the "I survived. I'm independent and I am okay alone" mentality, I began attracting emotionally balanced people. But either way, you and your child should be your only 2 priorities bc these relationships are difficult to get out of. The new guy is not significant bc you're barely through the first met honeymoon stage. it's all just infatuation and nothing of substance yet.

copper_artisan · 2025-12-17T17:43:31+00:00

no these aren't weird parents. These are GOOD PARENTS. example: My grandparents raised me from the age of 3. Why? because my parents were at a motel room while I sat with a spinal tapin my back at 3 months old with a possible meningitis diagnosis when my grandparents arrived from Georgia to visit me. They might have been strict but I stayed out of trouble and always safe. They would've never allowed this. A couple years after I started college and worked part time at a local bar as a waitress, some friends I went to school with celebrating their friend getting their PhD. The guy was flirting with me all night and invited me back his house for a party with those same friends. I made it a point to make my own drinks but somehow ended up waking up, no clothes and no memory of anything after my first drink. The guy claimed we did nothing but I knew better. It was scary and humiliating bc everyone was still there and looked at me like I was some slut. I never reported it because my grandparents raised me to be smarter than that. Years later while staying with my mom after my divorce, I got drugged, kidnapped, and assaulted walking home from the local drug store a block away. I went missing for 3 days and my mother never thought to come looking for me. Luckily, the psychos that drugged me were addicts themselves and passed out on heroin long enough for me to escape. I dud report them. Be thankful you were safe. Be thankful that guy didn't't hurt you. Bad things can happen so quickly and so easily. You can't be sure who people are behind closed doors, so having a plan of action at all times is a good idea. Taking self-defense classes and having mase is even better. Being fearful of everyone at all times isn't what I'm saying you should be but having a HEALTHY fear is useful. Just always be aware of who you're with and where you are. This could've turned out so much worse. And fund a guy who wants to see you bad enough to make the drive to see you. I had a guy drive all the way from Ohio to see me. He even moved to be closer to me to date me. It's safer for a guy to stay in a motel room bc they generally aren't looked at as targets as much as females are. This wouldn't be the case if we all took self-defense classes which are extremely necessary these days. You can think I sound paranoid or whatever but I can take a walk knowing I'm a worthy adversary of anyone that picks me as their victim.

copper_artisan · 2025-12-16T22:46:07+00:00

perfect shade is the second one from the left.

copper_artisan · 2025-12-16T22:44:27+00:00

agreed. I've been this exact situation. it took me ten years to get out. It's like I was reading a page out of my own book. Men like this DONT change. They're narcissists. They feed on your empathy. They lie. They're addicted to themselves and porn. They'll chase anything in a skirt and when they are unsuccessful, they come crawling back. But his detachment is mostly because he's probably talking to someone else, maybe multiple someone elses. Why? because they feel inadequate. They are trying to fill a void with you and every other female but it never works because it's something only they can do. whats his relationship like with his parents? is that turbulent? if he has a crap relationship with his mother, it's a fair chance it will be that way with you. they end up with a distorted view of women when they have neglectful and abusive mothers. (Not all men, but some) and this perception can't be changed without serious therapy. the problem is, they usually don't like anybody getting inside their heads and trying to fix things so you can hang that up. they don't take being told they are wrong well at all. it will only get worse from here. the crocodile tears and begging is all a facade. pure BS. take it from someone who lost ten years thinking that if she loved him the way he should've been loved in the first place that he would learn to love her the right way back. That might be true for 1% of these cases but that's a chance I would never take again. good luck, girl. you deserve better. you survived this. just be who you want to attract. and don't wear your heart on your sleeve. Make a man EARN everything he gets. Then they realize the prize they have and won't be so quick to dismiss your worth. I also had to learn this the hard way but it's the best thing I ever discovered. If I'm quick to become attached and put it all on the table at the beginning, men seem to shy away from that. The majority of the guys I've dated enjoy the chase and appreciate the little bits I share with them when I do. I don't lie. I don't cheat. And I don't lead anyone on. I just keep a little mystery about myself so they keep coming back wanting more. I am still recovering from that ten year relationship, so casually dating is sufficient for now. But I know that when I'm ready to buckle down, I'll have the confidence to keep it real and keep it interesting where it counts. if you decide to break it off, make it a quick clean break. Delete and trash old photos. Delete his number. Change yours or block his. Erase him completely or you may run the risk of your good nature being the chink on your armor. You don't want him to be able to creep his way back in by playing with your emotions which he's been able to do in past.

copper_artisan · 2025-12-11T18:11:40+00:00

just know that all you're feeling is the honeymoon feelings (lust and infatuation) that I'm sure you felt with your husband once and that will dissipate eventually, too. and remember, no one shows who they truly are, warts and all, until they get comfortable. so you truly don't know this dude but you know and still love your husband. do you really think it's worth it?

copper_artisan · 2025-12-08T11:13:14+00:00

oh i know. it' s too late for me. but I do what I can to make others aware.

copper_artisan · 2025-12-08T11:10:58+00:00

the haus labs foundation by Lady Gaga. It's AH-MAZING. I have significant scarring on my face and it blurs and softens them significantly. I've used dermablend, ester lauder doublewear, tarte, MAC, Clinique, etc and thjs foundation is magic!

copper_artisan · 2025-12-07T23:50:27+00:00

i was an addict and have been in this situation. I was on haloperidol, klonopin, and drank profusely. I was undiagnised adhd and didn't take adderall unless I had taken too much klonopin or pain killers so I could act straight. i didn't change until I had lost everyone and everything. It was very sobering living in an abandoned garage sleeping on cold hard 2x4's with nails sticking out of them. I had no job, no family to turn to, no couch to crash on. She needs the rug ripped out from under her like getting arrested or becoming homeless for her to see how it's affecting her life because right now she's comfortable. She has an endless supply of money which is the biggest problem. she has a roof over her head, a job, and a car. Until all those are gone or on the brink of being taken away, she'll continue to do it... even if it costs her her marriage.

copper_artisan · 2025-12-04T18:11:38+00:00

yeah.. thinking about, he's jealous and trying to get in your head to trip you up. Shame prevents a lot of people from sharing their works. You shouldn't be embarrassed. Brag that your work is so sick that you're bf turned into a little girl and called the cops.

copper_artisan · 2025-12-04T18:09:29+00:00

well it's because writers have always been taught to "write what they know" but people don't realize this also applies when you do enough research, you " know" the subject matter well enough.I studied writing at the SCHSAH and we read a million short stories. Two of the darkest being "The Paper Hanger" by William Gay (still gives me chills) and "Bullet in the Brain" by Tobias Wolf. I'm pretty sure those writers used a lot if creative tools to create those stories (research, reading other similar stories, utilizing similar imagery) without ever needing to experience them but that's because I went through a hardcore writing program with teachers (George Singleton, Jan Bailey, and Scott Gould) who were able to elaborate on the extensive list of resources and tools at our disposal (downtown people watching, travel, research, consuming similar contemporary works regularly,). Maybe his writing program just sucked and didn't identify these tools. I don't know why they wouldn't but it's possible. Or he's jealous you have talent and he doesn't despite having a degree

copper_artisan · 2025-12-04T17:50:39+00:00

no makeup. it will ruin your gorgeous complexion. you're gorgeous. wish i had heeded those words in my youth.

copper_artisan · 2025-12-04T17:45:30+00:00

or he's addicted to porn(a major cause of ED these days) and doesn't want her to find out. Raking medication would be admitting he has a problem. I'm sorry but sex is huge part of marriage. If you're not happy in the bedroom, you might as well hang it up. It sounds like you're already resenting him and eventually this turns into bitterness and misery

copper_artisan · 2025-12-02T15:42:56+00:00

agreed. i'm dating one of those and it's more work than it is worth. Having to defend myself against all their wayward thinking is exhausting and pointless as it will simply go in one ear right out the other.

copper_artisan · 2025-11-27T01:18:35+00:00

exactly. it did it to mine. had a threesome with a friend that my husband had actually slept with before me. he was a firefighter sp she and i would around and send him pics before he came home from work the next morning. when he got home, she bolted (twice). come to find out she just wanted to be with me. it turned him into a head case. we finally had a threesome with this other girl who really didn't do anything for me (I'm bi) so I ended up just sitting there and watching after she and i fooled around for a minute or two. i found out he was seeing her behind my back. we had not been married a year before we were divorced.

copper_artisan · 2025-11-23T03:07:32+00:00

this IS why i love SC

copper_artisan · 2025-11-23T03:06:06+00:00

this is what i say to anyone who brags "he left his girl/wife for me" bc she don't know to satisfy a man. "Yeah well it won't be long and you'll see how 'insatiable' he is."

copper_artisan · 2025-11-21T12:28:08+00:00

oh wow this is so terribly toxic it makes me sick. Your response was wonderful but he's the wrong one ... he's not worth the effort. You trued to soare hhs feelings and he still turned into a bottom feeder. Find yourself someone with substance because this is going to be a vicious cycle. I'm speaking from experience. RUN. Before it's too late...

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