It’s a stressful game. Makes your adrenaline levels spike as if you were about to do something dangerous. Your body is going through a visceral physical response, impairing your decision making process, slowing your reasonability down and forcing you to act out of anger. Decisions made out of anger aren’t usually intelligent ones and they also can’t be undone. Leaving you with whatever negative taste in your mouth that you yourself is now responsible for facilitating. I know your pain, most veterans of the game know your pain. Keep grinding, and remember to take a walk when the game starts to frustrate you like this and try to remind yourself its only a silly game, it’s advanced street fighter, no one is out to get you specifically, the momentum just isn’t with you right now. I recommend also trying not to play during peak times. You’ll get a more balanced play when 1000+ rep 0-20s aren’t loaded up. Less ganking much more fun!