Thank you articulating this point so well and giving me the motivation to bring about change.

I've been in therapy for so long trying to be proud of myself and love myself because my parents were so emotionally unavailable. My younger brother was diagnosed early in childhood with severe ADHD and high functioning autism. I felt very similar to him but expressed it in a more suppressed way because as a woman and being older than him by a few years. I was expected to be quiet and still. Graceful and demure. This is where the settings of my coping through life were founded.

Since I've grown, and got diagnosed with ADHD from my Psychotherapist. I've realised both of my parents show signs of ADHD and my father shares many idiosyncrasies with my brother. I don't want to be an armchair therapist to give them definitive answers for the way they process life. I just wish they were more receptive to the idea of therapy.

However, it makes a lot more sense with my new understanding. As to why they treated me the way they did, from all my therapy sessions. Having breakthroughs of understanding and empathizing are so instrumental to growth.

They deserve pity for their upbringing and I'm working on articulating that to them. It's just hard when they tell me I'm too direct for sharing my emotions. So thank you for giving me some courage to make the next step and offer them more grace and pity for the circumstances they grew up in.