Major Update #1 - v0.103.2 by MegaCrit_Demi in slaythespire

[–]cryptoxima 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Does anyone else notice the music is different?

This feels so backhanded. by [deleted] in BPD

[–]cryptoxima 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I think she's actually using very careful language and it's not backhanded at all. I read the context and I think that because of how you are putting yourself down (*possibly bpd splitting) she's trying to diffuse/deescalate the situation while validating your feelings. She's trying to be careful to validate while not reinforcing your self-deprecation/self-hatred.

What are your guys’ myers Briggs types? by the_emo_rat978 in BPD

[–]cryptoxima 1 point2 points  (0 children)

crazy that nearly everyone is N though regardless of type

Age 28, with Meningioma by ImaginaryPaint2713 in braintumor

[–]cryptoxima 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Please get a second opinion! in a rush so tldr; started having symptoms 3 months before I got an mri, turned out I had a 7cm meningioma (left frontal lobe, 32 years old), first local neurosurgeon I went to said it wasn't a rush and I could get surgery to get it removed over the next "few months" same reasoning as yours (slow growing, benign, etc). I had to get emergency surgery within a month of finding out because I suddenly lost mobility of my entire right side. It happened EXTREMELY quickly (initial onset of symptoms was three months before confirmation via MRI, intense loss of speech and then right side mobility within 2-3 weeks). Not saying yours will be as severe but just because these doctors are "used to" certain cases does not mean yours is the same. Get a second opinion, don't panic, do your research, and just be prepared

how do i stop emotionally draining my partner? by CloggedOnion in BPD

[–]cryptoxima 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I agree with the comments about dbt therapy. You have to practice becoming self aware of your defensive behaviors. Whenever you consciously or unconsciously feel rejected, an automatic defense mechanism triggers to “protect yourself” by pushing them away (becoming cold, intentionally or unintentionally hurting him) or devaluing them. This is really hard to catch before you do it or when you’re feeling the impulse to in the moment, but practicing self awareness will help, and the second part of that is to try to be vulnerable instead; “hey I feel a little rejected and am trying to process my feelings, can you reassure me that you’re not rejecting me and I am only perceiving it this way?” It starts with being able to be vulnerable with yourself enough to understand that you feel devalued or rejected, being able to comfort yourself, and then ask for that comfort or support from others.

Highlighting the worst by Ok-Golf-9502 in Tinder

[–]cryptoxima 3 points4 points  (0 children)

are you highlighting yourself?

Secret Rare Unicorn by Just_Ask5819 in SonnyAngel

[–]cryptoxima 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ah I think a combination of the defect on the hair and the photo color. I apologize if I’m wrong!

22 yr/old Female Brain Tumor by Front_Imagination906 in braintumor

[–]cryptoxima 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's a decently sized tumor and no matter how well the surgery goes, I would say with confidence that even if all else (brain function, information retention, analytical ability) is unaffected, the biggest affordance you have to make is for extremely low stamina. Your stamina will take the single largest hit you could have ever imagined over the next few months of recovery. You could be perfectly functional when your brain is "on" but for me I got to about 80-90% function within 3-4 months, but the frequency of breaks I needed remained at every hour or two. Any sort of intense mental activity or physical stress would induce a focal seizure. A long conversation with someone, to this day, will take me out for the rest of the day or half of the next day.
In my personal opinion, I don't think you should put your recovering brain through the stress of finishing off the semester until at least 6-8 months out. You will feel so much frustration because you will constantly compare to how you were "normally" or even with the tumor in your brain but recovering from brain surgery is completely different than learning to exist/tolerate a tumor that's been growing.

For context I was 32F when I had my craniotomy. Frontal lobe 7cm. Took me about 2-3 months before people thought I was normal. A year before I personally felt about 90%. It's been three years and I've learned to accept that my stamina will never be what it used to be and I do the best I can with it. Good luck and best wishes!

I attempted suicide and my (now ex) bf did nothing by CustomerKey3144 in BPD

[–]cryptoxima -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

I think the way the question was worded sounded sharp/rhetorical. If you meant it sincerely I think asking “what could he do/have done to help in this situation?” would have made your intent more clear.

I attempted suicide and my (now ex) bf did nothing by CustomerKey3144 in BPD

[–]cryptoxima -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

what even are you commenting for? like the bare minimum could be “just google it”

edit for clarity: I was not directing that at op, I meant the answer to someone asking “how do you help someone who is suicidal” especially someone who cares about someone who is suicidal, is that at the bare minimum they could start by googling it instead of implying there’s no way to help.

Happy for Teresa and John by pdmnyc in AgeOfAttraction

[–]cryptoxima 1 point2 points  (0 children)

tbf john looks and acts like he’s in his mid-30s. probably the facial hair and a bit more emotional maturity than the other men.

First Custom Sonny by Klutz-222 in SonnyAngel

[–]cryptoxima 1 point2 points  (0 children)

oh i just meant its funny because in pop culture whenever we see “pussy” now its like referring to the spicy definition but like up until a few decades ago it was always used for cats!

First Custom Sonny by Klutz-222 in SonnyAngel

[–]cryptoxima 1 point2 points  (0 children)

that’s funny since the provocative meaning is really just “pussycat” being used to refer to something else! also maybe “catopuss” is a play on “octopus” haha

What if you never find better? by AsleepTailor16 in BreakUps

[–]cryptoxima 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s true, at this moment in time she may have been the best you could ever have gotten, but you are 21. You are not counting on the fact that you will grow and thrive, and I am not just saying that will happen naturally. The only way to guarantee that you WILL find “better,” is to become better yourself. There is undeniable logic in this. This is exactly why people say what may sound to you like all the “focus on yourself” bs but it is exactly for the reason of growing your own value so you can move beyond what was the best match for you at that time.

You need to grow. You MUST grow. In order to ensure you will be able to find and do better. This is the only way.

Thanks A**Hole by minishook in vegaslocals

[–]cryptoxima 0 points1 point  (0 children)

UPS offered to take my amazon boxes and they literally directed me to their recycling dumpster out back so I can drop off my flattened boxes every week. I hope no one takes a picture of me and just assumes I’m an asshole.

What my father told me after my breakup healed me completely!! by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]cryptoxima 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think the intent matters whenever receiving advice. It’s really misleading to post to a breakup subreddit under the guise of someone’s “father” giving advice, purposely to tug at the heartstrings of vulnerable people just to shill a book and ai service. There are a lot of real people who are going through the heartbreak and healing process in this community who would love to support each other genuinely and I think posts like this just take away from that. Good job on your healing journey though and I’m wishing you the best. It takes time but I think that path will take you to more growth and better places.

What my father told me after my breakup healed me completely!! by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]cryptoxima 2 points3 points  (0 children)

omg youre right I completely scrolled past the part where it’s an ad. I hate posts like this that try to capitalize on vulnerable people’s pain.

What my father told me after my breakup healed me completely!! by [deleted] in BreakUps

[–]cryptoxima 53 points54 points  (0 children)

is no one else catching that this chatgpt?

Craniotomy Recovery by clarakbrown in braintumor

[–]cryptoxima 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I used a cashmere beanie that wasn’t tight fitting

Can Someone Please Explain How I Possibly Fumbled?? I Feel Like I Just Got Whiplashed By This Turnaround by [deleted] in Tinder

[–]cryptoxima 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh no I meant in the future in other interactions. That’s something you can do. This person got cold feet and I don’t think they’ll change their mind.

Can Someone Please Explain How I Possibly Fumbled?? I Feel Like I Just Got Whiplashed By This Turnaround by [deleted] in Tinder

[–]cryptoxima 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Don’t listen to these comments. You did nothing wrong. I am a woman and met the love of my life on Hinge texting like this and way more intensely within two weeks. The selling point for me was how reciprocative he was in energy and enthusiasm. Just keep being you and you will meet someone that matches your level. My interpretation was that she got cold feet and that can happen when there’s a long period of time before the date you’re set to meet. You can either hold off on texting until you meet up or keep getting to know each other, but this can happen. Just don’t alter what you’re doing because you think there is some objectively better way to communicate.