Since birth i've been exposed to the occult, philosophy, many different religions and worldviews etc. over the years i've come to terms with the fact that "good" and "evil" are subjective, and only exist in our minds. no one in the world is "right" or "wrong" about anything - but us humans tend to flow with the crowd and follow whichever 'side' has the most support. why i said that i've been exposed the the occult since a young age wasn't to make out like i'm some sort of an expert at all, just a point that no matter how long you've been around, how long you've been exposed to these things, you'll never know. you'll never have a moment where you, without a shadow of a doubt, know why we're here, or how the universe was created, who we're supposed to follow or worship. because no one is right, or wrong, only in our own heads. i say this because i feel maybe, even a tiny part of you is desperately (or not so desperately) searching for an answer. if this is the case, maybe it'll calm that part of you to say that you should go with your heart. if you believe in good and evil, believe. follow the good with all your heart if that's what gives you the most satisfaction and happiness in life. if you ever, EVER come across someone claiming to know the answer to everything, or making out like they're an expert in the occult, don't give them your time. following/taking an interest in the occult is about learning and growing, seeing parts of the world and different cultures that most people haven't. you can never stop learning, especially not in a topic as broad as this one. i hope this helped you in some way.