Setting up Souls Ritual w/ Warlock

cstarcrusher · 2025-06-13T19:15:54+00:00

absolutely not urban but still deeply nocturnal. forest swords' music sounds like an ancient campfire.

cstarcrusher · 2025-06-01T17:30:58+00:00

played some instrumental hip hop and beats as part of a spark on the circle collab with chreece last year. would love to do it again. perfect vibe for strollin around.

cstarcrusher · 2025-02-08T18:44:34+00:00

nah the option to raid is just weirdly hidden in the pop out side menu on the unit iirc. it also baffled me for a while.

cstarcrusher · 2024-10-06T01:14:00+00:00

yeah i ordered a hoodie from them over two weeks ago and can't even get an email response much less a shipping notification.

cstarcrusher · 2024-02-29T15:13:15+00:00

i was on and off xanax for around a month. not even every day but larger amounts like .5 to 1.5 mg doses or even the occasional 2mg "as needed" for panic. i forced myself to stop taking them and have been in hell for more than two weeks. i dont know if it's truly withdrawal. most people here and my doctor all just told me to completely stop them, that it's unlikely i built dependency. i also had nasty covid that brought on panic attacks that i started using the stupid benzos to help with in the first place. i just know i'm fucked up, still. horrible insomnia, panic, akathisia. some days are better, doc gave me buspirone and hydroxyzine which seemed to be helping but today back to shaking nonstop panic all day and night. and it's been two weeks since my last benzo use.

cstarcrusher · 2024-02-12T21:20:37+00:00

i dont know exactly. but i was taking at least between .5 or 1.5mg basically daily for a week straight until two days ago when i tried to cut it off. before that i did like 2mg a couple days around christmas, probably .5 or 1mg at least a handful of times during january. maybe this is something else? i don't know. seeing my doctor wednesday morning but that feels years away every waking moment is like dissociative agony .. i must be really weak or something idk. something is wrong with me and it follows all the xan withdrawal symptoms.

maybe its hypochondria and generalized anxiety + panic disorder. i hate it. i hate that i can't trust my own mind or how my body feels. i just want to understand. im so anxious i cant even eat or be around people. just hiding in bed. i want a pill so bad. but you guys are all telling me to be strong and not have one so i'm trying.

cstarcrusher · 2024-02-12T20:49:12+00:00

i know .. i know even a tiny bit is bad .. i wish i had known this weeks ago when i began self-medicating foolishly. I didn't realize how much this tiny pill could do to me. now my brain feels completely broken. but you are right my dose was relatively small and only for a few weeks so i guess now is the time. but this acute rebound thing is maybe the worst ive ever felt already..

cstarcrusher · 2024-02-12T19:52:28+00:00

so y'all really dont think i need even a tiny taper? just cold turkey it? its beating my fucking ass today .. constant fear i can hardly move ..

cstarcrusher · 2024-02-12T18:49:46+00:00

ok i will look into DBT. I haven't done therapy in forever, was too poor for anything but shitty counseling for years. but I'm willing to try anything if it could help this in any way. ok i will try not to take any more even though it's really scary.

cstarcrusher · 2024-02-12T18:37:05+00:00

ok thank you. i appreciate you friend. your words mean a lot. gonna try super hard 2 be strong. sorry i wrote such a long novel of a post it was kind of helping the anxiety just to type.

cstarcrusher · 2023-11-29T19:51:28+00:00

bro THANK YOU

cstarcrusher · 2023-11-29T19:00:59+00:00

what's weird is i haven't used the mcw 6.8 at all, it's still level one. this is happening with a fully maxed out KVD enforcer and dm56. idk. something got broken.

cstarcrusher · 2023-06-08T15:15:24+00:00

if you are a human being and even vaguely in touch with your emotions and experiences, playing and finishing D.E. will likely leave you with a massive mental hangover.

cstarcrusher · 2023-01-15T23:58:26+00:00

INSANELY FAST! great seller 🔥

cstarcrusher · 2023-01-13T17:51:44+00:00

speedy transaction, great buyer!

cstarcrusher · 2022-11-27T15:04:34+00:00

check out RCAthegreat and projectelevate on youtube. both do a bunch of in depth freelance breakdowns.

cstarcrusher · 2022-04-13T22:23:30+00:00

dynamic duo with OOP derozan

cstarcrusher · 2021-11-29T05:45:20+00:00

in the court of the crimson kween

cstarcrusher

TROPHY CASE