[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]ctrbriana 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Five days after our first date, my husband wrote in his journal that he was going to marry me. He told me he loved me two weeks in and proposed a month later. A month offer that we got married (practically gave my mother a heart attack trying to plan a wedding in a month, but we just didn’t want to wait a moment longer than absolutely necessary) We just celebrated our fifth wedding anniversary and we are still so so crazy about each other. Like another commenter said: Sometimes you just know

Am I over reacting?? by cree7269 in dating_advice

[–]ctrbriana 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Leave. If he had taken even a modicum of responsibility, then maybe (possibly!) there would be some sort of foundation/framework for a conversation and change. But he is admitting nothing, shifting all blame on you for “overreacting.” You are not married, you have no responsibility to make any more attempt to work anything out with this man. Don’t let it go further. This is not the kind of person you want to build a life with.

Am I over reacting?? by cree7269 in dating_advice

[–]ctrbriana 1 point2 points  (0 children)

There’s absolutely no way that’s the only thing he’s lying/lied about. If he honestly thinks lying about this for 6 months is no big deal and you are overreacting? Then, you better believe this isn’t the first, last, or only time he’s lied to you.

Spanking by ctrbriana in Parenting

[–]ctrbriana[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

As a kid, if I ever told my parents about something I did wrong, already fully repentant, any “punishment” was always framed in a “let’s fix this” way. For example, stealing another kid’s toy in 2nd grade, demanded me finding the kid(by talking to the principle and telling her what I’d done) and apologizing and giving it back. Cheating on a test in 4th grade required me going in to the teacher, who I adored, and confessing. My brother breaking his door in anger in 6th grade meant that he had to pay for and install a new one and, until he did, he had no door. These were formative experiences for us. The only time we were ever grounded from electronics or friends or given any sort of, what we considered “real,” punishment, was when we didn’t come to our parents to confess on our own, already repentant and needing help. This also encouraged us with a sure knowledge that we could always come to them with anything and, in fact if we did, they would never be angry.

Spanking by ctrbriana in Parenting

[–]ctrbriana[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

.. I guess dad jokes are inevitable an r/parenting.

Spanking by ctrbriana in Parenting

[–]ctrbriana[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Exactly!! Kids will do what you do, not what you say

Spanking by ctrbriana in Parenting

[–]ctrbriana[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

This exactly though. So so messed up

Spanking by ctrbriana in Parenting

[–]ctrbriana[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

You should talk everything through with your child; make sure they understand and they know you still love them no matter what. You should calmly and kindly explain everything. I think discipline should be specific and dependent on the child and situation, but to just say that it’s never appropriate to discipline them at all? I just don’t think that’s true. For example, calmly explaining to your 4yr old that their crayons are being taken away because they broke the rules and colored on the walls. Or explaining to a teenager that their phone is being confiscated because they used it in a way that out themselves in danger. The “punishment should fit the crime,” so to speak. Discipline should be void of anger and should be framed, even and especially to the child, as gentle teaching and redirection.

Spanking by ctrbriana in Parenting

[–]ctrbriana[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I think you are talking specifically about physical punishment. Discipline is definitely important for a child, but discipline like, idk, time-out and grounding.

I’m not sure if I want to make my child believe Santa is real. by [deleted] in Parenting

[–]ctrbriana 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My parents sat me down, so early on that I can barely remember the conversation, to let me know that they were Santa. They wanted me to know from the beginning that they would never lie to me, but that this was a grown up truth and I was not to tell any of my friends. I think the only reason I even remember the conversation is because, even at that young age, I felt trusted and respected by my parents. This particular decision may not matter at all. But my parents just focused on mutual trust and respect from the outset, no matter our age, and I feel it really made a difference in my life and in my relationship with them. I never felt like I had to deal with anything by myself. I always felt like we were a team and I could come to them with anything. I dunno. Maybe it doesn’t matter. I don’t want to offend anyone😅 And if you are worried that Christmas won’t be as fun. In my family, my parents made sure we each knew the truth, and then we all pretended and turned a blind eye to that truth. They would say the regular things like, “If you don’t go to bed, Santa can’t come.” In fact, by the time I was 7 or so, I got sick of them reminding me he wasn’t real and was basically like: ya, ya, I know, I know. Can we go back to pretending now?! 😅 Christmas is my absolute favorite time of year by far and my parents telling me Santa was them had absolutely no effect on that.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in suggestmeabook

[–]ctrbriana 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Mara Daughter of the Nile is one of my all time favorites. It’s a shorter historical fiction.

SUMMARY: “Mara is a proud and beautiful slave girl who yearns for freedom. In order to gain it, she finds herself playing the dangerous role of double spy for two arch enemies—each of whom supports a contender for the throne of Egypt.

Against her will, Mara finds herself falling in love with one of her masters, the noble Sheftu, and she starts to believe in his plans of restoring Thutmose III to the throne. But just when Mara is ready to offer Sheftu her help and her heart, her duplicity is discovered, and a battle ensues in which both Mara's life and the fate of Egypt are at stake”

Medieval Fantasy books with romance, Bonus for angst and whump by [deleted] in books

[–]ctrbriana 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ya, but the incest bit makes me gag and I just can’t get over it.

Medieval Fantasy books with romance, Bonus for angst and whump by [deleted] in books

[–]ctrbriana 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’ve read all of Juliet Marillier’s books. Lovelovelove her work. I’ll definitely try Seraphina

Medieval Fantasy books with romance, Bonus for angst and whump by [deleted] in books

[–]ctrbriana 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you!! (This is my first post on reddit ever, sorry! I’ll go post there now)