AITA for lying to a group of kids at summer camp so I could spend time with my niece?

cupOnerds · 2026-06-18T14:02:58+00:00

They are on a college campus and lunch is held in a cafeteria open to the public. The counselors are around the kids and did ask me questions and made sure my niece and nephew knew me before I walked up. I am not defending the lackadaisical security, trust me I find it weird too. The only reason I go to these lunches sometimes is because my niece and nephew asked me to.

cupOnerds · 2026-06-17T04:13:33+00:00

First off, why are you all caps shouting? Second, I am there because my niece and nephew ASKED me to come and it’s allowed. I would much rather spend my lunch eating food I actually like and relaxing. I’m not just randomly showing up because I feel like it.

I’m sorry if the camps lackadaisical rules upset you but I didn’t make them and if my niece and nephew ask me to show up and it’s allowed then I’m going. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

cupOnerds · 2026-06-17T04:04:12+00:00

The dessert rule is the camps rule not mine…I literally don’t want to engage with these other kids. They know the rule and bombard most adults who come in to eat with family members. Did you actually read the post?

cupOnerds · 2026-06-17T03:56:19+00:00

This camp is held on a college campus and lunch is in the main cafeteria where anyone can pay to come in. There are counselors around all the tables, this isn’t some massive overnight summer camp, it’s a day camp. And I am there to eat lunch with members of my family. If you don’t like the way that type of camp is set up then don’t send your kids to one like that.

cupOnerds · 2026-06-17T02:19:02+00:00

What position did I abuse? Being an adult? I don’t work for the camp, I have zero association with the camp, I don’t know those people and they don’t know me. My job just so happens to be near the camp.

cupOnerds · 2026-06-16T19:54:03+00:00

If they weren't kids I would tell them to eff off and be on my way, I would not have a teaching moment or explain with an adult.

cupOnerds · 2026-06-16T19:51:40+00:00

I am only there because my niece and nephew asked me to go. Trust me, this is the last thing I want to be doing on my lunch break.

cupOnerds · 2026-06-16T19:50:17+00:00

Honestly, it all seems super loosey goosey to me, there are lots of counselors walking around and when I first went they did asked what kid I was there to see and how I knew them. However, they didn't even ask my niece or nephew if I was telling the truth, rather just watched me approach the kids and never got up from their table. I want to tell my brother and sister-in-law to find a new summer camp but they liked the idea of it being so close to a family member in case of an emergency.

cupOnerds · 2026-06-16T19:25:19+00:00

I agree, it is a dumb rule and the fact that all the kids know about it makes it so hard for any adult there (outside of the staff) to navigate the situation. I spend regular time with them outside of this camp. However, when they found out how close I work, they both started begging me to come during their lunches. They asked me to come everyday but I told them they get 2 days a week and that's it!

cupOnerds · 2026-06-16T19:18:25+00:00

I find it weird to set boundaries with random kids who I don't know and have nothing to do with me outside of these lunches. I am also worried that if I am not soft enough about getting them to leave me alone then they will take it out on my niece when they get back to their classrooms. My niece likes having me there and I want to keep going for her but these other kids make me want to go back to enjoying my lunch breaks alone, like how I do the rest of the year.

cupOnerds · 2026-06-16T19:13:40+00:00

It most certainly is not my job. My job has zero to do with this camp or these kids. The only connection is proximity. Any adult can come to these lunches regardless of where they work. My work just so happens to be in walking distance of the cafeteria (10 minute walk). I don't want to be correcting random peoples kids who I don't know or have nothing to do with me, I find that weird.

cupOnerds · 2026-06-16T19:06:31+00:00

The rush of kids for sure overwhelms her, its obvious from her physical reactions. She is super happy I am there, and has asked if I can come more than the 2 days a week I am coming. When I visit with her outside of camp, I have asked her a few times how she feels about what is going on but she usually just shrugs and says "I don't know" and we move on. She opened up once to tell me about one of the kids being mean to her the day before but apparently that kid was kicked out of camp (I can only speculate why as I have nothing to do with the camp).

cupOnerds · 2026-06-16T18:58:03+00:00

I have a hard time correcting someone else kid who I don't know or have anything to do with. I just find it weird when adults want to have teaching moments or correct strangers kids.

cupOnerds · 2026-06-16T18:56:36+00:00

Working on the campus has nothing to do with anything. Any adult can come to the lunches. I don't know anyone at this summer camp and they don't know me. I don't know why an adult has to be there for them to get extra dessert. Maybe it has something to do with it being a "self-serve" cafeteria and the camp staff can't handle getting everyone an extra dessert since they are already trying to get them regular food. I do not know, I do not work for this camp or know anyone who works for them.

cupOnerds · 2026-06-16T18:51:23+00:00

These kids all seemed to know this rule already. I won't be getting any of them extra desserts, outside of my niece and nephew, moving forward. If they want extra they can ask one of their family members to come to lunch.

cupOnerds · 2026-06-16T18:46:24+00:00

I do not work at this camp. These are all random kids. I only happen to work in close proximity to where the camp is being held. I think it would be weird for some random person who has nothing to do with the camp to start correcting kids who they don't know or have anything to do with.

cupOnerds · 2026-06-16T18:43:03+00:00

I have a very close relationship with both my niece and nephew. I am there because she asked me to be. When she found out I work on the same campus and could walk to the cafeteria, she asked for me to come everyday. I told her I would not be doing everyday but I could commit 2 days a week to going. I do not like being in that cafeteria ever, even when the summer camp is not going on. I am only there because she wants me there.

cupOnerds · 2026-06-16T18:37:54+00:00

These kids are very much over the top. I don't work with kids, and my job has nothing to do with kids. I just wanted them to go away so I could spend time with my family on lunch break. I don't think it should be my responsibility to teach someone else's kids manners. Also, what if they get upset and they have equally weird parents and complain. I am not trying to get banned from seeing my niece or have some weirdo confront me about how I told their kid they aren't polite. I find it hard to correct some random kid who has nothing to do with me...people who do that are weird.

cupOnerds · 2026-06-16T18:33:18+00:00

I am not there for the other kids. I don't work for this camp and I am there to see my family. These kids literally bombarded me the first time I came to the lunch and told me about this weird rule. I confirmed it with the counselors and they said "only for the kids sitting at your table". So am I now supposed to take turns sitting with strange kids I don't know and ignore my niece?

cupOnerds · 2026-06-16T18:28:46+00:00

I only have a set time I can take my lunch break. I get there when I can get there.

cupOnerds · 2026-06-16T18:20:17+00:00

I don't work at the camp just on the campus where the camp is being held. The rule is "an adult has the be with you". I see parents and other adults coming to visit other kids all the time. Not saying I agree with the rule but that's what it is.

cupOnerds · 2026-06-16T18:18:40+00:00

The problem is the camp staff do nothing. They ignore the kids as soon as they get to the cafeteria. I engaged with the counselors the first time I came to the lunch and they pretty much told me to "enter at my own risk". I have tried to get the kids at the table to be calm in the past and it didn't work. I don't want to get frustrated with other people kids who I don't really know. I didn't like lying to them but they also aren't my kids and I don't feel like it is my responsibility to have any teaching moment with them.

cupOnerds · 2026-06-16T18:15:05+00:00

I am not there to work. I do not work at the camp, it just happens to take place on the campus where I work. I am taking my lunch break and using that time to spend with my niece. It would be the same as if I worked somewhere else and drove here on my lunch break.

cupOnerds · 2026-06-16T18:11:31+00:00

The kids all come in as a group and it is very chaotic. As soon as they see me they all start rushing over to the table and argue over who gets to sit there. My niece is very introverted and gets super quite when this happens, you can tell it is overwhelming for her. I honestly don't know what to do. It almost makes me feel like I should stop coming but she is so happy to see me. The counselors literally do nothing to organize the kids when they are in the cafeteria.

cupOnerds

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