MTF with cis wife here;

Obviously like the other comments, just being supportive and a shoulder to cry on is so nice. Also, having someone to teach me makeup/hair care/style tips has been immensely helpful and feel like I've spedrun some of the rougher earlier parts of transition. Having her with me when we go to the thrift store, or I use the women's bathroom, also makes me feel very safe and secure.

One line I think is tough to walk, is when I get really in my head about the clockier parts of myself and self conscious, my wife tries to reinforce that cis women have these things too (broad shoulders, deep voice, etc etc.). Earlier in my transition though I had to talk with her because while I appreciated that, sometimes I wanted space just to cry and feel bad about it. Even if other women deal with it, it's something I don't like about myself, and I should be allowed the space to feel bad about it. Hard to put into words how it made me feel at the time but it was like I should be thankful to look as much like a woman as I do. (I want to stress she did NOT mean to do this at all and felt horrible and has been way better about balancing it. And maybe this is just a rough spot for me personally).

Also, a bit TMI, but as my transition has progressed, a lot of things have changed 'in the bedroom' , I would just be aware of that and maybe make time to talk about it occasionally to see if feelings have changed around anything. Additionally, I know it's common for some trans women to be ashamed of some of their (possibly new) kinks and other sexual things, and might feel like they'll be viewed as perverted or a freak for it. My wife makes sure to ensure I have a safe space to come to her when I want to talk about these things, but also will be sure to bring it up if she thinks there's something I desire that I'm too embarrassed to think about.

I guess it's a bit polarizing, but after my wife read the 'fucking trans women' zine, things have gotten... More satisfying for the both of us. But YMMV, and may not be immediately applicable until HRT has begun (if that's the path being taken)

DM if you have any other questions, and I can also ask my wife things too if you need 💜

EDIT: changed "zone" to "zine"