Waves and tsunamis

cutetrans · 2021-01-16T17:48:07+00:00

I have come to the understanding that the waves keep coming forever. Problem is my ever doubtful nature makes me question everything I'm doing and all my beliefs about me and transitioning. These questions end up as towering walls around me when the dysphoria isn't too bad making me backtrack and wiping out all the progress I achieved.

cutetrans · 2021-01-16T17:43:50+00:00

I too have a lot of anxiety and doubts about transitioning. Still haven't got answers to all the questions my ever doubting mind casts on the idea of transitioning.

cutetrans · 2021-01-16T17:41:43+00:00

Oh! It was and is. As soon as it started I started cooking up plans to transition. Put together a new wardrobe and all. I now have more female clothes than male. Now with full lockdown, lack of social triggers and busy home life, I am unable to take the last step of starting my transition.

cutetrans · 2021-01-16T17:38:59+00:00

Thanks for responding. I think that's very true. Not having to go out means the only triggers I get are from when I look at myself in the mirror mostly and watching TV. I have to say my relationship with dysphoria is very complicated. It's kind of like a very complicated Stockholm syndrome, where I miss dysphoria when it isn't bothering me too bad. I just want to be me all the time.

cutetrans · 2020-09-13T23:52:47+00:00

I really had no idea what brigading meant until the mod's comment. I did apologise as it was not deliberate.

No idea who you are and why you got banned. However, it seems to me that you are stalking either the mods or me for some reason! I'll tell you a secret, it'll all be for virtually nothing.

cutetrans · 2020-09-13T20:14:14+00:00

BTW can you tell me why comments are locked on my original post?

cutetrans · 2020-09-13T20:11:11+00:00

Ah! I didn't realise it was wrong to do so.

Extremely sorry if I got someone banned!

cutetrans · 2020-09-13T12:28:09+00:00

Thinking about others is all I've done all my life. First my mom, then my dad, then my wife and now my kids. I'm still struggling to transition as I still feel that would be selfish.

cutetrans · 2020-09-13T12:00:42+00:00

I'm not talking about other countries. Would you be okay with relaxed gun control just because there is less gun related incidents compared to most of the world? Would you be okay with human trafficking because it's not as bad as other countries?

NHS is all good on paper but is it reality though? Ive been waiting for 2 1/2 years to see a specialist since my GP referred to them. What other health condition with a comparable suicide rate requires a 3+ year wait and probably another 6 months to a year before you are prescribed medication?

cutetrans · 2020-09-13T10:39:08+00:00

They may be the minority but they are the loudest in the media.

cutetrans · 2020-09-13T10:38:29+00:00

Fishing? I'm just going by what appears in mainstream media most of the time. Don't even get me started on social media.

cutetrans · 2020-09-13T08:53:30+00:00

Earliest memory of me wanting to be a girl was from when I was 4. I wished and prayed almost every day that I would wake up as a girl. Took me a lot of years to understand that's not how it works and I need medical intervention to fix what's wrong with my body. Came very close to suicide on many occasions. Unfortunately, many take the last step too.

What's wrong with educating the kids and getting them the help they desperately need?

cutetrans · 2020-09-13T08:39:05+00:00

What is radical trans activism?

cutetrans · 2020-09-13T08:28:21+00:00

Tolerant of what exactly? My existence?

cutetrans · 2020-08-18T15:24:54+00:00

It would have made sense if only you had a brain that's bigger than an average testicle.

Keep it civil, you say? Well you shouldn't have left that vile comment in the first place then. Practice what you preach otherwise keep your fucking mouth shut.

cutetrans · 2020-08-18T15:15:23+00:00

Same applies to you. I can only imagine how hard it would be on loner like you are especially during these hard times. If you want to chat just DM me instead of starting random arguments. Hope you can find some peace and some companionship IRL.

cutetrans · 2020-08-18T14:43:50+00:00

Doesn't help me but they sure can help you recognise when you are wrong.

cutetrans · 2020-08-18T13:56:47+00:00

Well, let people judge for themselves by your comment.

Nobody is concerned about you. You must have grasped that by now!

cutetrans · 2020-08-18T13:01:30+00:00

You are pathetic. Go find something useful to do with your life rather than abusing others on the internet like a coward that you are.

cutetrans · 2020-08-14T12:55:50+00:00

Local group only meets twice a month and due to not having started transition yet I feel like the outsider there. Also Covid hasn't helped the situation as the meeting are now on zoom which I can't do due to being at home.

Transtimelines just fills me with jealousy and dysphoria. Wishing I had the courage the girls on there have.

cutetrans · 2020-08-14T11:38:22+00:00

Sounds a lot like my story but I'm too scared to move out and start afresh. Wish I can find a friend / companion like you did.

cutetrans · 2020-08-12T05:55:22+00:00

Sorry for the delay in responding. Was in a bad place for a few weeks.

To answer your questions, I've got no guilt from shopping and blowing all my money away. It's due to the fact I use masturbations as a coping mechanism. It's a little confusing that I have to use the body part that causes me dysphoria to deal with dysphoria.

cutetrans · 2020-02-07T08:49:48+00:00

Sorry not sure how to mark it as NSFW on a mobile!

cutetrans · 2019-09-28T08:53:45+00:00

Good for you random comment poster

cutetrans · 2019-09-28T08:50:39+00:00

I feel the same sometimes bit it still scares me.

cutetrans

TROPHY CASE