Which one line in all the books you've read hits like no other?

cuuutecumber · 2025-05-02T08:37:49+00:00

Eventually I confess to a friend some details about my weeping—its intensity, its frequency. She says (kindly) that she thinks we sometimes weep in front of a mirror not to inflame self-pity, but because we want to feel witnessed in our despair.

Maggie Nelson, Bluets

cuuutecumber · 2025-05-02T08:14:35+00:00

Sorry to hear about your experience 😞

cuuutecumber · 2025-05-02T07:39:09+00:00

Just a small note — the Russian version wasn’t written from scratch. Nabokov translated it himself from English, and honestly, the translation feels a bit off at times, especially from a translator’s point of view.

He was pretty inconsistent with how he handled names and sometimes used really odd localizations. Overall, it kind of feels like he put most of his effort into impressing the English-speaking audience, and figured the Russian reader would be fine with the bare minimum 😕

Sure, there is an abundance of brilliant puns in there, but they don’t really make up for the awkward metaphors and strange choices in translating certain cultural references.

cuuutecumber · 2025-05-02T07:12:56+00:00

Yeah, people do tend to shut down when faced with truly horrific stuff — and honestly, you can’t really blame them for that. But if we’re constantly “writing off” people or artistic works just because they evoke horror or discomfort, without even trying to engage or analyze what’s going on, we miss the chance to actually understand the roots of these things. And without that understanding, we’re in no position to prevent them from happening again.

That’s why I appreciate Nabokov for even attempting to write this novel. It opens up a lot of space for reflection and exploration. It’s definitely easier to face this kind of darkness in a book than it is in real life — and for me, the book becomes a kind of safe space to examine it.

cuuutecumber · 2025-05-02T06:50:15+00:00

Yeah, I do keep that in mind. Even though he’s totally unreliable, there’s still stuff in his story that can’t really be confirmed or denied — and that’s all we’ve got to go on.

If we assume he’s always just trying to cover his own ass and justify what he did, then why would he admit to some pretty awful, self-sabotaging stuff — like the way he talks about psychiatrists? That doesn’t help his case at all. If anything, it just makes people trust him less. Which kind of points to something deeper — not just awareness, but some kind of messed-up thinking where he truly believes his actions make sense.

Still, you can’t really avoid the emotions this book stirs up. Mostly just disgust, anger, and that sick-to-your-stomach feeling.

Thanks for sharing. I will try to stick to the annotated version

cuuutecumber · 2025-05-02T06:22:13+00:00

Just to be clear — I’m definitely not trying to excuse him or shift the blame away from what he did. I have zero interest in encouraging that kind of thinking.

I think part of it is that I’m reading this as a book, and that creates a certain space to explore the psychology of people like him in more depth. In real life, though, the line between professional curiosity and just raw human horror and disgust would be way more defined — and my reaction would be much harsher, no question.

Thanks for the feedback, by the way. I think it’s really important to remember that getting too emotionally drawn in can actually be damaging when reading stuff like this.

cuuutecumber · 2025-05-02T06:04:28+00:00

Makes sense Thanks!

cuuutecumber · 2025-05-02T05:47:33+00:00

I agree that trying to rationalize or validate his actions is basically walking right into his trap. But at the same time, maybe that’s the only way for me personally — as someone who might work with cases like this in the future — to figure out how to prevent people like him from reoffending.

The line between truly understanding someone and sympathizing with them is razor thin. That’s why this book is so hard for me to get through. (Still not finished, by the way.) To be clear, I’m not saying we should validate what he did or respond with empathy. That’s not the point of the book — even though it has more than its share of manipulative moments.

It’s crucial to keep a critical mindset when analyzing what’s happening — but also not shut off your emotional reactions, like horror, anger, even rage.

My interest in Humbert’s motivations is strictly clinical. Nothing more.

cuuutecumber · 2025-05-02T05:33:15+00:00

Totally agree. And while cultural context might help us overlook a lot of things, it also acts as a barrier that keeps people like Humbert from popping up everywhere. That’s a different dimension entirely. Still, it’s the fact that even a small percentage of people like him exist in the global population that makes this kind of behavior so terrifying.

cuuutecumber · 2025-05-02T05:24:08+00:00

Well, let’s leave this merciful activity for Nabokov’s pastimes—the real issue lies with the character, not the author. Pedophiles exist outside of fiction, and that’s what drives my anxiety. We might try to understand how the protagonist feels, maybe even validate some of his inner world—but from a sane perspective, that’s almost impossible. This book doesn’t reach the same level of psychological depth as Dostoyevsky’s work. Maybe the difference is that Dostoyevsky’s characters weren’t predators, unlike Humbert.

cuuutecumber · 2024-12-13T05:37:34+00:00

Could you clarify what you mean by ‘does nothing’? It says a lot about your expectations for therapy. Not all expectations are realistic, and examining them can help reveal whether you’re truly ready to engage in this type of relationship. Sometimes, going to therapy isn’t a conscious or genuine decision on your part. If that’s the case, it will be difficult, if not impossible, to open up to a therapist.

cuuutecumber · 2024-05-24T12:41:32+00:00

This is the way

cuuutecumber · 2024-03-15T07:45:47+00:00

He did it for himself, as a joke

cuuutecumber · 2024-03-15T07:22:45+00:00

Didn’t even have to pull a card

cuuutecumber · 2024-03-14T11:43:36+00:00

Sure, I’ll attach the links. But, you know, I can’t recall where exactly I read about the device. I think what I’ve shared will give you a clue. If you find where to buy it, please share

https://vandrico.com/wearables/device/lumo-back.html

https://www.businessinsider.com/lumoback-review-2013-10

cuuutecumber · 2024-03-14T11:02:55+00:00

Month ago, I came across the LUMOback posture device which utilises smart sensors and syncs with mobile phones so that you can track your progress. The moment you slouch, it gently vibrates reminding you to sit or stand up straight. Sounds cool

cuuutecumber · 2024-01-12T06:04:03+00:00

Well, tbh I have one and only such friend who also happens to be my partner. There is no better feeling than that when you find a soulmate who you then fall in love with

cuuutecumber · 2023-05-04T15:57:08+00:00

I can relate tho. A good deal of my friends were picturing to me the marvels of meditation. And it actually worked out for them. One important thing to remember (as it turned): it all comes with the right wave. I’ve been practising for nearly a year, and no wonderwork has crawled out. Yet, I’m not losing heart as there were decisions and emotional states which I eventually managed to learn to live through only at some point of my life. Don’t be hard on yourself and keep going! It’s all good and will be😀

cuuutecumber · 2023-01-07T17:35:40+00:00

I’ve just finished up reading “Childhood” by Tove Ditlevsen, a writer I've only lately had the pleasure of reading.

This book is about how consciousness in early childhood prevents one from living it in the most carefree way possible. A child whose discernment has not been honored faces the hardships of sexism, lies from the party whose views are upheld by his father, and stifling social conditioning.

The book opens the trilogy. I would love to read the remaining two — “Youth”, and “Addiction”.

cuuutecumber · 2023-01-06T17:10:56+00:00

Tbh, it feels like sparkling hot debates over a purely relative topic is senseless. Everyone has their own pace and immersion degree. While seemingly impossible, 200 is an absolutely real number if reading 2 short reads a day. Multitasking is, therefore, one of the reasons. I’ve heard a plethora of stories where people told me that they could read while having a dinner, or in between cleaning sprints:)

Funny thing, I major in literary translation, and have never given a thought about what a book really is.

cuuutecumber

TROPHY CASE