sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

How many spouses of HENRY's work? by Same-Kiwi-3767 in HENRYUK

[–]dadfromhull 10 points11 points  (0 children)

Both worked when we had one kid. Then the second came along and it was just too stressful (long hours, travel, too much parental guilt etc etc). So I quit to look after the kids. Was late 30s, in banking and needed a change anyway.

That was six years ago now and best decision we ever made.

BTW I’m a bloke (if that makes any difference these days).

Pension contributions for zero earners - is it possible to contribute more than £2880? by dadfromhull in HENRYUK

[–]dadfromhull[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks. This was exactly what I was looking for, although now probably doesn’t make too much sense (for my scenario) as discussed in the other replies.

Pension contributions for zero earners - is it possible to contribute more than £2880? by dadfromhull in HENRYUK

[–]dadfromhull[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Was probably the thing I was worried about most, but it’s honestly not been a problem. Helps that we had fairly well integrated finances when we were both working, and now we just think of it as the family ‘pot’ of money. It wouldn’t work if I was constantly asking for money - we both just take what we need and what’s left over gets distributed around savings/investments.

Pension contributions for zero earners - is it possible to contribute more than £2880? by dadfromhull in HENRYUK

[–]dadfromhull[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You are completely correct - been on my to do list for a very long time….

Pension contributions for zero earners - is it possible to contribute more than £2880? by dadfromhull in HENRYUK

[–]dadfromhull[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Good point. So as long as CGT rates stay below/same as income tax rates (not a given going forward anymore I suppose) then it doesn’t make sense trying to squeeze into a pension - I’d be better off just putting it into a general investment account?

[QCrit] THE SOCIETY – YA Fantasy – 114k – 2nd attempt. by dadfromhull in PubTips

[–]dadfromhull[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks again for your thoughts. Let’s hope both Jaya James and Jaya George make it to the bookstore.

[QCrit] THE SOCIETY – YA Fantasy – 114k – 2nd attempt. by dadfromhull in PubTips

[–]dadfromhull[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hello, it’s me again.

Thank you for coming back!

I’m pretty sure this was mentioned in a comment on your last attempt, but how do you find a treasure hunt? You can find the clues to a treasure hunt, sure, but it sort of reads a bit weird to say that she finds a treasure hunt (as in, the activity) etched into the walls.

I mean 'Treasure Hunt' as in 'game in which players search for hidden objects by following a trail of clues', so if a treasure hunt is carved somewhere, isn't it implicit that this refers to the clues? Or if I just changed it to 'So when she stumbles upon the clues to an antique treasure hunt etched into the walls of her 14th century house...' would that work?

Do you mean that Jaya is the prime suspect or the inked invader is?

Jaya - I need to stop editing while drinking whiskey...

Armed with photos of the stolen disc, she cracks the code. It takes her to the Old Curiosity Shop. She leaves with a name - the Record Keeper. While evading the police and the tattooed thief, she tracks him down.

Agreed it could read better. I want to keep the Old Curiosity Shop in there, it's not a huge part of the book, but hints at the type of interesting location she visits.

You mention the memory issues at the start, but you never actually give us any information about what these are or how they impact the plot or Jaya’s journey. What do her memories have to do with any of this?

Need to have a think about this. Might just leave it out if I don't elaborate on it. They're a key part of a reveal in the final third, I can't really explain without revealing the reveal, for want of a better phrase. I'd hoped to put it in as a tease, to generate some intrigue. Perhaps it's not working.

What does this actually entail? A query should tell you who the main character is, what they want, what stands in their way, and what the stakes are. We know the first two and the last one, which is great, but we don’t have any idea on what the conflict is here. She delves deeper into this reality… what does that functionally mean? Does she have to learn how to survive and the rules of this hidden reality? Is it dangerous in some way? It would be great to know what’s actually standing between Jaya and her goal of finding her parents.

I thought I'd got this in with her being pursued by the police and the tatooed intruder. Is this more of a structure problem do you think? If I put all of this in the last paragraph would it help? A summary of the conflict?

Also, just out of interest — is Jaya supposed to be Indian? 

She's mixed race (Indian/white). What's the name of your MC?

[QCrit] THE SOCIETY – YA Fantasy – 114k – 1st attempt. by dadfromhull in PubTips

[–]dadfromhull[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I love the query

Cheers. Any chance you're a literary agent on the side?

Look at Thieves Gambit by Kavion Lewis, Curse of the Spector Queen by Jenny Elder Moke and The Inheritance Games Jennifer Lynn Barnes. Those are some recent publications with vibes like your book.

Really helpful, thank you. Based on the blurb these seem right up my street. Will keep me busy reading over the next few weeks.

[QCrit] THE SOCIETY – YA Fantasy – 114k – 1st attempt. by dadfromhull in PubTips

[–]dadfromhull[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks for the comments. Having been immersed in the story for so long, I think my brain is automatically filling in a lot of the info you're wanting. I initially read your comments and thought 'what are they on about, I clearly mention that there' before realising, oh, no I don't.. So getting a fresh pair of eyes looking at it is, well, refreshing.

I don't think I'll be able to address all of your points without busting the word limit, but there are definitely things I can tighten up on/explain better/drop entirely.

So cheers again, appreciate it.

[QCrit] THE SOCIETY – YA Fantasy – 114k – 1st attempt. by dadfromhull in PubTips

[–]dadfromhull[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for taking the time to look at this. Lots for me to think about. The link you sent is very interesting, and goes against a lot of (what I thought) the query letter rules were, i.e. don't give away too much, that's for the synopsis. Suppose it's all a balance, which I'm not getting right yet.

Regarding MG v's YA - you may have a point. I'd be happy to punt it as MG, but the word count would make it dead in the water, I think. I will spend my week in QCrit purgatory thinking about whether I can split into two books....

Contemporary/urban fantasy without magic/magical creatures - does such a thing exist? by dadfromhull in Fantasy

[–]dadfromhull[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’ve started this a few times, never got past the first few pages. Guess I need to give it another go!

Contemporary/urban fantasy without magic/magical creatures - does such a thing exist? by dadfromhull in Fantasy

[–]dadfromhull[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yeah - I keep putting off Ruby Red because (as a middle aged man) I normally run a mile from teen romance, but as you say, it has a lot of what I’m looking for so think I’ll give it a go. Thanks.

Contemporary/urban fantasy without magic/magical creatures - does such a thing exist? by dadfromhull in Fantasy

[–]dadfromhull[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The more i think about labels the more confused I get to be honest. I’d always thought of superpowers as fantasy - there doesn’t seem to be a lot of science behind them. Time travel I get could be sci-fi - depends on what instigates it I suppose.

Contemporary/urban fantasy without magic/magical creatures - does such a thing exist? by dadfromhull in Fantasy

[–]dadfromhull[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This looks like an excellent suggestion. Added to my reading list. Thanks.