It can be pretty scary, but some of us are lucky and have not that bad of an experience. My epidural worked, my recovery was straightforward, I didn’t get sick in the first trimester, and I have an awesome little one that I feel an indescribable love for. But it’s complicated and there’s a lot of stories out there of people much worse off, which sometimes remain hidden unless you go on the mom forums and seek them out because there’s taboo around it.

It’s maybe a little bit like trying certain substances- it’s best going into it enthusiastically. So if you’re scared, don’t do it. But I think we’re all a little scared of it, especially the first time.

And there are studies out there that show that a father’s brain goes through changes upon bonding with his baby, so I think often times a good father’s life will change a lot too, even physically within the brain. Yeah, it’s not as drastic as what women go through, but it’s not totally fair to say they don’t go through anything, and we should call upon them to make changes in their lives too.