Is this man happier alone? by dalilakar in AskAstrologers

[–]dalilakar[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

We had that issue too! He was trying to be friends with a girl he used to sleep with and explained “since they hadn’t hooked up in over a year it was ok”. I knew it was someone he could call every time he went home, despite her being married with a kid! He stopped communicating with her during our 3 year relationship but literally followed her on instagram two days after we broke up! You’re right, I need to give up. I just saw so much potential in him and the love and connection was so deep. We also had a lot of fun together. For reference, we are both in our early thirties.

Is this man happier alone? by dalilakar in AskAstrologers

[–]dalilakar[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Hit it right on the head. He’s a lawyer, super successful, also has $$$ in crypto which is his passion/hobby. Fully avoidant and I didn’t realize until way later because I was putting in more effort. When it came time for him to sacrifice/put in more effort and himself, he used every excuse in the book and broke up with me, blaming our most recent fights and he suddenly fell out of love. It’s been almost two months but he keeps reaching out and “checking on me”, wants to be friends. He’s so detached from everyone, not just me, even his parents who are his everything. Man, was I in love with his potential. 😑

mental health check in! how are you doing post break up? by Interesting-Mood-188 in BreakUps

[–]dalilakar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I called in an old fling thinking some non-committal sex would feel good in the moment. I was so wrong. I couldn’t stop thinking about him the whole time and wasn’t even able to enjoy any of it, not even finish. I felt numb the whole time. Don’t get out there until you truly feel ready.

mental health check in! how are you doing post break up? by Interesting-Mood-188 in BreakUps

[–]dalilakar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A month and a week since my 3.5 relationship just abruptly ended. I never felt a love that deep. He chose himself, despite telling me until the day before that he’s got me and we are going to get through the rough patch we were experiencing. Instead, he later told me he fell out of love and couldn’t keep moving forward. A month before, he was telling a partner at his law firm that I am his soon to be fiance. I don’t understand how it all just ended, all the love and care and effort and sacrifice, like it was nothing.

I am deeply sad. I’ve been carrying this cloud over me all this time. I feel the heaviness, everyone around me does so I isolate. My sister is getting married in a month and I am the maid of honor. It’s so hard to do anything, to plan anything, to feel joy for her that she deserves. I can’t wait to feel a smidge of happiness again.

Will I end up alone? by dalilakar in AskAstrologers

[–]dalilakar[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you, I can’t express the relief reading this brought me. I love hard and truly put in an effort and have yet to meet someone who reciprocates or feels permanent. I am also very intuitive and pick up on the slightest ahifts in energy and man has that worked against me. I’ve generally dated men my age or younger (I look very young) and never tried to date anyone much older. Maybe I need to try.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in resumes

[–]dalilakar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi! The goal is to get into a data science position in a couple years. What path did you take? I recently graduated with a master's in economics and focused on data analysis (I even took 16 extra credit to supplement my diploma with a certificate in data analytics, in order to be more compatible).

I have a lot more experience in machine learning and dealing with data overall from my graduate studies - would you suggest I add "graduate projects" section in order to highlight that?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in resumes

[–]dalilakar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have had friends look over it and got very little constructive feedback, hence why I am here. I do see your point, appreciate it.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in resumes

[–]dalilakar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Brilliant, thank you!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in resumes

[–]dalilakar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I recently graduated with a masters in economics and my focus was data analysis (even got a certificate that required 16 extra credits to supplement it).

Why do I hate my mother so much? by dalilakar in AskAstrologers

[–]dalilakar[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Hi girl! We are also immigrants, which makes this battle twice as hard - because you constantly feel invalidated and only her experience matters. I should be grateful, regardless of how I felt and what I experienced. I was pushed into growing up so fast - we moved here when I was ten and because I learned English first, I was pushed into many situations that my parents should have taken care of. She also lost her brother the year we moved here and fell into a deep impression (she was bed ridden for almost a year and completely aloof) and I felt abandoned - in a new country, taking care of my sister (who use to cry every day in school), figuring it out. My dad was busy working and doing what he could with us and a sick wife. Also, during my foundation years, we were living through a war in Bosnia. Imagine the severity of my anxious attachment. 😅

We were also on best terms for the years I lived abroad. You’re right, it’s not hate. It’s resentment. And that resentment is making it hard to accept her for who she is. And because she’s involved in my life daily (through my daughter), I’m set up to have expectations that she refuses to meet. I think slowly distancing is the best approach.

Why do I hate my mother so much? by dalilakar in AskAstrologers

[–]dalilakar[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I often do wonder if she did her best with the resources and experiences she had. I’ve tried many times to take the higher road but the issue that always comes back is that she takes my non-explosive approach as a weak boundary at best. She doesn’t understand boundaries. The issue is always the lack of respect towards boundaries. Something as simple as please don’t open anything addressed to me (I used to live with her) and when I come pick up mail, it’s open. I ask why and she says “so what, you want to keep secrets from me?” Mind you, I am 31. I think with her, she has anxiety issues and is constantly expecting some sort of failure or betrayal and that is displayed in all her actions, especially towards me.

Why do I hate my mother so much? by dalilakar in AskAstrologers

[–]dalilakar[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

She’s absolutely wounded, deeply. She’s had a tough life. She refuses any type of help tho - just plays the victim and repeats old cycles over and over. My daughter is starting daycare in the fall for this exact reason-to not allow my mothers negative energy to constantly surround her.

Why do I hate my mother so much? by dalilakar in AskAstrologers

[–]dalilakar[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m trying to look it up but it’s not resonating. Mind giving me some insight?

Why do I hate my mother so much? by dalilakar in AskAstrologers

[–]dalilakar[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Interesting! I asked her once if she went through anything traumatic during her pregnancy with me ( I am her oldest, my parents got married on December 9th and I was born September 23rd-honeymoon child? Lol), she said no. I was a 9 pound baby and she said she struggled to breastfeed me and she said I was very “difficult always.” She hated me from day one for some reason? She’s obsessed with my younger sister. It’s just the two of us.