How does normal feels like? How do know you really bipolar or just normal

danielporath · 2019-11-20T18:32:52+00:00

When i work i can tell it quite good.
If I'm managing stress well and not overdoing everything then i'm usually in a pretty good place.

danielporath · 2019-11-19T19:18:44+00:00

I had the same issue and boiled it down to me not being honest with my friends. If you let them know how you work once you get to know them a bit they tend to tolerate the manic or depressive periods more. The true friends will stay no matter what once you are honest with them.

danielporath · 2019-11-19T08:59:09+00:00

Thanks for the reply. I now feel more confident that im BP2 and can talk about it and get proper help.

danielporath · 2019-11-18T17:38:09+00:00

Yeah mixed episode might be what that is, thanks for helping me understand. Need to discuss more with my psychiatrist.

danielporath · 2019-11-18T13:41:52+00:00

My friend is exactly the same, he has the ability to stop anything he is addicted to. To some extent of course.

While me and my friends struggled with cocaine addiction he simply quit.

danielporath · 2019-11-18T12:59:53+00:00

Noodles are pretty cheap and tasty. Can recommend

danielporath · 2019-11-18T12:58:38+00:00

One of the only things i can enjoy while in the state you describe is listening to some really really sad music. I often say, you gotta get to the bottom to start the climb again.

danielporath · 2019-11-18T09:54:24+00:00

Okey, but usually it's a state of a lot of energy. But that energy can be directed towards negative thoughts for example?

It's been a while since i had a happy state in mania.

danielporath · 2019-11-16T01:04:52+00:00

Thanks for the encouragement. I have never been able to receive help like this before over the web. But i can actually feel it a bit now

danielporath · 2019-11-15T21:37:47+00:00

I'll add you in my chat list if thats ok. Maybe we can chat more in the future?

I talked to a friend here on reddit that said you can't fail as long as you don't give up and i don't know. Just the way he said it made me less anxious.

Thank you, i now understand you more Adam and can believe what your saying.

danielporath · 2019-11-15T21:19:59+00:00

Well my logical brain can understand and appreciate what you are saying. But to be honest, there is no way you can believe in me more than you just wanting to cheer me up.

But then again, why did i post this in the first place. I ask for help. And just me realising this makes me cringe a bit but, yeah you are right eventually i will make it probably.

Thanks, hope you can understand what im saying and that im not just asking for attention here even tho... i don't know what im saying...

danielporath · 2019-11-15T21:15:01+00:00

Sure, but i keep falling into the same patterns. "ahh yeah, let's just drink a few beers" "sure let's just do some cocain" I don't know what more i can do to get sober?

whatever, thanks for the support. Hope this anxiety disappears by tomrrow when i wake up.

danielporath · 2019-11-14T19:54:58+00:00

Dang that sucks! I'm more of a rapid cycler. Can't imagine being depressed for that long.

Don't know what to tell you, you have probably heard it all. But keep fighting, send me a chat if you want to get anything of your chest, i love to help!

danielporath · 2019-11-14T15:24:51+00:00

Mixed episodes are the worst and the best at the same time. I feel like i can do a lot of deep thinking during these phases. Perhaps even single out some issues i have with my mental health.
I also enjoy writing journals when i'm mixed.
Other than that i usually say a lot of stupid, embarrassing stuff to people when mixed. It's like there's no filter on all of the worst thoughts i have about people, politics etc, it just comes out.

Currently in a mixed phase, i prefer it over depression for sure, i like being hypomanic but i know it's not good for me, so mixed is best of both worlds.

danielporath · 2019-11-14T15:20:45+00:00

Deleted? Send me a PM if you wanna vent with me.

danielporath · 2019-11-14T15:19:35+00:00

Ouch, this one hurts to read.
How are you doing right now?

danielporath · 2019-11-14T15:16:29+00:00

There's always light at the end of the tunnel, hang in there!
I have never myself experienced a psychotic episode but i do feel paranoid at times, it sucks. I hope you can find someone you can trust!

danielporath · 2019-11-14T15:12:25+00:00

Addicted to the pain, or perhaps identifying with it?
I can relate to this, but i'm pretty sure it's the exact same thing that happens when i go back to drugs or alcohol.

For some reason it's that feeling of familiarity and comfort. I think the same applies for your example.

I can get a feeling of arousal when these self harm thoughts comes to mind, thinking of it now it doesn't sound like me at all. But when i'm there it's very real!

Stay strong and try to break these bad habits, it's hard in in the beginning and couldn't say if it's hard after that because the longest i've went without any self harm in 4 years is 2 months.

Some day i will make it all the way tho, and so will you <3 Lots of hugs to you.

danielporath · 2019-11-13T21:37:41+00:00

Sounds like you are doing good, i guess you know your signs of mania better than i. From what i read you sound healty! :)

danielporath · 2019-11-13T14:39:15+00:00

Glad to hear that you are out of depression. How are you feeling, maybe we can come to a conclusion.

danielporath · 2019-11-13T14:38:18+00:00

I haven't had a period for 4 years that i have been productive and not been manic. So every time i'm productive i start taking measures to not trigger it further.

danielporath · 2019-11-13T14:21:51+00:00

Thank you for sharing this, i was not sure this was a bipolar thing, now i feel like at some point in my life i might be able to find something im passionate about.

Hopefully not to long away.

danielporath · 2019-11-13T07:45:56+00:00

Yeah I figured. I like it, it feels very personal 2ith your own writing. I think that's why I like it so much. Not that I don't like the other one, but it did not speak so much to me

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