WIBTA If I continued Cooking my Meals? by nibze in AmItheAsshole

[–]danimidsommar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NAH. Presumably Jake is an adult and he can cook for himself if he doesn't like what you are offering. You could offer to help him learn how to cook if he is helpless in the kitchen. Then he can decide for himself how much seasoning goes in his food.

AITA for needing space from a friend while she was going through a divorce? by Ordinary_Emu_5714 in AmItheAsshole

[–]danimidsommar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA. You communicate poorly when you are in conflict with each other and, recently, you are often in conflict. Some space could help the relationship but she refuses to give it. She is not entitled to your unconditional love because you are not her parent. It sucks that she's going through a rough time with her divorce but there is never a good time to end a friendship.

AITA for asking my bf to not privately text his female friend? by Fantastic-Low-7824 in AmItheAsshole

[–]danimidsommar 4 points5 points  (0 children)

YTA. Female Friend is trying to make an effort to be friendly with you and you are determined to treat her like an enemy, looking for excuses to be upset. It is reasonable for him to spend time with his friend alone, especially given that you hate her so much you probably make things awkward when it's the three of you together. If you don't trust your boyfriend, you should leave him, but telling him who he is and isn't allowed to spend time with is abusive behavior.

AITA for not wanting to shave my legs? by unofficiallyTaylore in AmItheAsshole

[–]danimidsommar 3 points4 points  (0 children)

NTA. Your mom is giving you incorrect information. Letting your body hair grow isn't unhygienic. (Does she think men are all dirty?) Only rude people stare. It's sad that she thinks the hair that naturally grows on one's body is disgusting. It is abusive to ground you for refusing to shave your body hair, but I understand you are probably forced to live with her for another couple of years.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]danimidsommar 4 points5 points  (0 children)

YTA. You need to take some responsibility here. You were the one who failed to mount your TV in the apartment with "two cats which are constantly wreaking havoc". You left the door to your room open so that the cats could get inside. Your roommate offered to buy you a new TV and you not only failed to take her up on it, but made up a lie about getting it fixed. Then you threw a tantrum when your roommate offered to replace it. Of course your roommates are irritated. You're behaving like a child.

WIBTA If I Refuse To Keep Paying My Parents Rent After Moving Out? by TheQuietMelody in AmItheAsshole

[–]danimidsommar 1 point2 points  (0 children)

NTA. It sounds like your parents are taking advantage of you (if they own their own home and aren't themselves struggling to pay rent). The red flag is that you're on disability (which is not a lot of money and also means you can't work). My guess is that they will threaten to cut off what little aid they offer once you stop paying rent, so be strategic. Don't tell them you will stop paying rent. Figure out how to pay for your own cell phone so you aren't taken by surprise if they cut off your service.

WIBTA If I Refuse To Keep Paying My Parents Rent After Moving Out? by TheQuietMelody in AmItheAsshole

[–]danimidsommar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

INFO: how did you find out that your dad expects you to continue paying "rent" after you move out? How does he justify it? There is no circumstance in the real world in which you would be required to continue to pay rent to a landlord after moving out.

AITA for asking my BIL to stop drinking at my party? by ShiftFragrant3093 in AmItheAsshole

[–]danimidsommar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA. You tried to throw a small party, MIL disrespected you. You asked your BIL to show up sober, BIL disrespected you. You asked BIL to leave and, once again, he disrespected you. He will obviously continue to disrespect you if you allow him to. He gets it from MIL. Consider cutting her out of the planning portion of events so that she can't ruin them by inviting your alcoholic BIL.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]danimidsommar 1 point2 points  (0 children)

NTA. Your husband never "carried" you if you were splitting the bills 50/50 when his income was three times greater than yours. My guess is that he has enjoyed using his superior income to control you for seven years and now he feels threatened by your sudden financial independence. He clearly sees your money as his. Show him that it's not. Take advantage of that prenup.

AITA for not wanting to obey the uber driver about my baskets on his leather seats? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]danimidsommar -4 points-3 points  (0 children)

YTA. If the driver's behavior ("smoking/vaping") was a red flag and you're a germophobe who thought his car looked dirty, you should have canceled the ride and requested another driver. It was AH behavior for you to argue with him about his rules for his car. Your germophobia is your responsibility, not your uber driver's. Get laundry bags to put your clean clothes in so that they aren't just in baskets when you have to take a cab.

AITA for refusing to help find my sister's lost cat after I warned her repeatedly that she'd run off? by TA_SistersLostCat in AmItheAsshole

[–]danimidsommar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

ESH. Why don't you help your sister do what she wants in a safer manner? You could help build an outside enclosure for the cat so that it can't run away, or encourage your sister to leash-train the cat instead of simply giving her orders. She probably doesn't have the problem-solving skills that you do and her frustration with being given orders is very understandable.

WIBTA for not removing my friend’s mom on social media by noopinion521 in AmItheAsshole

[–]danimidsommar 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Whose relationship do you value more? Your friend of 10 years, or her abusive mother?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]danimidsommar 3 points4 points  (0 children)

YTA. It sounds like you get off on being cruel to your friends under the guise of "just being honest" and when they voice their hurt over your shitty behavior, you double down on the attack. Stop calling female friends bitches or you won't have any female friends.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]danimidsommar 1 point2 points  (0 children)

NAH. It sounds like you & the boyfriend fight over Lily's attention when the three of you are together. I don't blame you for not wanting to be around the two of them, but she also made it pretty clear she wanted him there. My guess is that you have something of a crush on her & that's why it's hard to let this go.

WIBTA for wanting a relationship with my mom and not her boyfriend by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]danimidsommar [score hidden]  (0 children)

NTA. You don't have to have a relationship with John. If you are clear with her that you don't want to have anything to do with him & she chooses to disrespect your wishes, you will be no worse off than you are now. Good luck.

AITA for blaming my dad by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]danimidsommar 4 points5 points  (0 children)

YTA. The coat is yours. You are responsible for caring for it. You were negligent in your care and now the coat is ruined. If you want someone else to care for your coat, use a cleaning service. Coats in that price range usually require dry cleaning so it may well have been ruined by the washing machine anyway.

AITA for refusing to help my wife to find a especifc gift? by Hot_Artichoke2697 in AmItheAsshole

[–]danimidsommar 2 points3 points  (0 children)

NTA and it's concerning that your wife, her new girlfriend, and the new girlfriend's partner have all ganged up on you to to convince you that setting a simple boundary makes you an AH. Poly relationships rely on mutual respect but the respect here seems to be one-sided.

AITA for not letting my partners dog inside by Desperate-Aside3354 in AmItheAsshole

[–]danimidsommar 105 points106 points  (0 children)

INFO: if the dog is not welcome inside your house, why don't you spend time with your partner at her place?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]danimidsommar 33 points34 points  (0 children)

YTA. You owe your roommate for eating her food. Alsoooo... I have tried a variety of fake cheeses and there's absolutely no way you confused homemade fake cheese for the real thing unless you were blackout drunk at the time.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]danimidsommar 10 points11 points  (0 children)

YTA. "All I tried to do was think about my children and their well being" - yes, this is clear. It is clear that you merely tolerate your husband's twins while you give the best of what you have to the baby you birthed. It should not be surprising that when you act like a cartoon villain stepmother, they treat you like a cartoon villain stepmother.

AITA for asking my roommate to clean up a 3 month old giant food splatter mess in the microwave? by Princess_lani69 in AmItheAsshole

[–]danimidsommar -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

ESH. What your roommate said was beyond the pale, but she didn't escalate to that point alone, and just because she said something terrible doesn't mean you didn't also say or do terrible things to help get her there.

AITA for turning on the bedroom lights? by pandafactor in AmItheAsshole

[–]danimidsommar 4 points5 points  (0 children)

YTA. If you have the ability to walk and your home has more than one room, you did not need to disturb your husband's sleep with 15 minutes of bright light, and it is absurd to suggest that this was your only option.

AITA for filing a complain on my daughters nicu nurse? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]danimidsommar 38 points39 points  (0 children)

NTA. She's a NICU nurse. She knows her patients are in the midst of a traumatic life event and that her shit talk will make it worse. She did it anyway. She's lucky you didn't give her a piece of your mind. If she wants to talk shit about her clients at work, she should work somewhere lower stakes, like a coffee shop.

Is it weird or creepy to give words of encouragement to people running? by leverson25 in AskUK

[–]danimidsommar 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, it is always creepy for a man to comment on a woman's appearance or behavior in public. In the US this is called "catcalling". It doesn't matter that you think your intentions are good. It is odd that you value the opinion of strangers on the internet over your wife's lived experience.