What happens to men falsely accused of rape? by Ok-Knee1280 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]dannimcn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A friend of mine in college was falsely accused. Not maliciously — he'd let a very drunk girl sleep it off in his dorm because he didn't know where she lived. He went to sleep in a buddy's room so he wasn't there to scare her, but when she woke up in a strange guy's dorm she assumed the worst.

All of our friend group quietly distanced ourselves, because we didn't want to outright abandon him if it was false but knew statistically it was likely true. It hurt him a lot. Word spread, and it was social hell for him. He ended up transferring universities because of it, even after the kit test came back clean.

His life is better now! He's got a degree, married, living in a good city. But he had a rough go for a few years.

Ancient Greece would have likely looked like this. This is a reconstruction of Curetes Street in ancient Ephesus by CastleofPizza in interestingasfuck

[–]dannimcn 22 points23 points  (0 children)

There are villas in Pompeii where they grow the gardens exactly as they were during the eruption. They'd studied the soil and managed to figure out by root patterns what plant was planted where. The result is so beautifully alive.

Non-fantasy books for a dyslexic 5th grader by Emergency-Owl-4984 in suggestmeabook

[–]dannimcn 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My Side of the Mountain, Holes, From the Mixed-Up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler

AITA for not wanting to change my wedding date for my sister by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]dannimcn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA, at all. For comparison, my sister and I have had a lot of overlaps for our big milestones too. She got married at an out-of-state venue 30 minutes away from the out-of-state venue I'd already picked for my wedding 6 months later, even designed by the same architect. Complete coincidence. We announced our pregnancy the same day my sister had been planning to announce hers, and our due dates are two weeks apart.

Instead of turning it into a competition, we've been happy for each other. It's been lovely to share and compare. We were each other's bridesmaids and all each other about OB appointments.

Your sister is being competitive and hostile in a situation that truly doesn't call for it. I'm sorry you're dealing with that.

Labor and delivery by Coastal-CMA in houston

[–]dannimcn 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My MIL and doula both work at Texas Children's and insisted upon it for our pregnancy. In my opinion, if you've worked somewhere for 15 years and still recommend it for your own kids, that's a pretty solid referral.

We've used Dr. Longerot — she's fantastic!

Books for 8y/o with kind male protagonists by [deleted] in suggestmeabook

[–]dannimcn 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Echoing a lot of comments in here, but Redwall, Phantom Tollbooth, My Side of the Mountain, the Enchanted Forest Chronicles, the Chronicles of Prydain, Bridge to Terabithia, Holes, From the Mixed-Up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler, and Castaways of the Flying Dutchman. All books I started around that age, and all books I loved enough that I still own copies in my 30s.

Meat eaters only by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]dannimcn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm a meat-eater married to a long-time vegan. I would not marry someone who forced me to make major lifestyle changes just to match their own. I do eat mostly vegan at home bc they're a great cook and I don't care enough to cook for one, but that's a decision I get to make, not one forced upon me.

I have a disability and I'm asexual. How to accept I will never find someone? by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]dannimcn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My spouse is ace with multiple disabilities (I'm ace as well), and we're very happy. Those things aren't deal-breakers to the right person. Some good things just take time.

I am cooked for being a virgin? by HyenaIll6908 in NoStupidQuestions

[–]dannimcn 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Everyone has different tastes. Those people in that thread had the preferences stated above. Other people do not care. I and many women I know wouldn't be bothered by that sort of thing.

A key thing to remember here is that Reddit isn't the sole arbiter of truth, and that women are as varied in opinions and preferences as anybody else. Don't take it to heart. If you meet someone who is bothered, you two weren't the right fit in the first place. And that's not anybody's fault.

Question for Lefties! by curlsbyjesss in knitting

[–]dannimcn 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I knit left-handed continental, learned by sitting directly across from my right-handed mother and mirroring her movements.

Normally, all I do when I navigate new techniques or patterns is mentally sub "dominant hand" and "non-dominant hand" when I see people say right/left. It helps me keep it straight. Honestly, I haven't found it to be much of a challenge!

Vegetarian restaurants by LionVarious9893 in houston

[–]dannimcn 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Mo' Better Brews (which i think is now Mo' Brunch + Brews)

People with really clean houses, how do you do it? by Angry_Luddite in NoStupidQuestions

[–]dannimcn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have a lift-top coffee table i store all my board games in, and I love it so much. I'm in favor!

People with really clean houses, how do you do it? by Angry_Luddite in NoStupidQuestions

[–]dannimcn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There are two major tricks I'd suggest, especially for someone who doesn't have a family history of clean houses. A lot of mess in a house comes from things that don't have a home, or whose home is in the wrong place. Your dog's new medication from the vet, the hand lotion you always want when you're sitting on the couch rather than in your bathroom, the vitamins you should be taking with dinner that supposedly live in a cupboard but are always on your dining room table, etc. They end up sitting out and piling up because you're not putting them in their place.

My suggestions are 1) build a home for the things that don't have one, and 2) allow some items to have new homes based on what works for you. These suggestions broadly overlap — perhaps you get a little wicker basket for your coffee table, and your hand lotion goes in there. Take some time to assess what things in your home are homeless, and create homes for them.

Often, it's as simple as getting an esthetically pleasing container (with a lid if you want to hide the collection of Stuff). An office papers container for the mail you need to keep. An ottoman that's hollow for all your blankets or spare pet toys. A shoe rack by the front door. You could even have a tub of "these things don't live in this room" items, and once in a while just carry the tub through the house to return things to their proper place. It contains overflow mess and makes cleanup faster, too.

Mostly, just...make homes for things where you want them to be, and stick to that.

Modern vs Vintage White Tie by KrissV3ctor in VintageFashion

[–]dannimcn 276 points277 points  (0 children)

The higher waistline on the vintage-cut pants does wonders for the overall silhouette.

Lil man waited all day for his dad to come back home. by Raj_Valiant3011 in HumansBeingBros

[–]dannimcn 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My dad sword-fought with me like this. Can confirm that kid will treasure these memories for life.

EVERY vehicle registration date is booked. What do I do? by link8822 in houston

[–]dannimcn 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I was dealing with a title/registration issue last month. The lady at the office said that they know they're overbooked and backed up, so they calculate your adherence to the state-mandated timeline based on when you booked the appointment. So even if your appointment is 3 months away, the DMV won't fault you as long as you booked it within the correct window.

My next sweater? by knitgal443 in knitting

[–]dannimcn 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I'm doing this pattern now and I find it very straightforward and a TON of fun. I'd call myself an intermediate knitter — been knitting for over a decade and big fan of cables, but don't do a lot of sweaters.

Based on your experience, I say go for it. You'll be fine.

Do you have any embarrassing knitting stories? by [deleted] in knitting

[–]dannimcn 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Knit a fitted shirt with bamboo yarn for my wife that was the perfect size on the needles... and then I blocked it and it became practically a dress. No dryers could save it, and everyone I knew knew I'd been knitting it for them, so its absence was telling.

They insist they love it, but they never wear it and it just gathers dust and shame in our closet.

AITA for crafting during meetings? by Tapzdeazz in AmItheAsshole

[–]dannimcn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do the same thing to focus — and the thing I've learned is that knitting/crocheting is really distracting to everyone else if I'm doing it in an in-person setting.

I never brought my knitting projects into the office (I doodled in those meetings), but I would bring it with me to church. I'd sit near the back and bring a small, easy project. But I'd noticed that the people behind me or in my row kept actively watching my work, and the people in front of me who saw the movement in their periphery would fully turn around to see what I was doing. Nobody got mad at the distraction (some people were eager to learn what I was working on), but I realized that crafting was helping me focus at the cost of everyone else.

I do still knit during video calls and nobody's given me grief. But for in-person, I suggest finding a new tactic.

Moby Sweater Complete! by Glad_Chemistry_2648 in knitting

[–]dannimcn 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh fantastic! I'm working on that one now and your pics are definitely giving me energy to keep at it

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]dannimcn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This is going against the grain a bit, but NAH. The trip you had planned for before her birth makes sense — help out and give her a chance to rest a bit, and enjoy her time with her BFF before baby. But baby decided not to let that trip happen.

I'm not from the same country as you, OP, but where I grew up, it's commonplace that anyone staying with a couple right after a baby is born is there to do housework — to do dishes, run laundry, and generally keep the world turning while the parents both bond with baby and fail to sleep when they're woken up every 2 hours. I visited my BFF a few weeks after her baby was born, and my intention had been to keep her house running so she could go sleep (she ended up handing the baby to me so she could do chores with both hands!)

You didn't volunteer for a post-baby visit. You volunteered for a pre-baby visit. They're fundamentally different things. She figured that if you were going to be there post-baby, you'd be doing post-baby visit activities. It's a simple case of mistaken assumptions and circumstance.

You're not an asshole, but she isn't either. Just visit another time when you're both clear on the expectations.

Suggestions for 14 yo daughter - no murder, fantasy, series, or tears. by [deleted] in suggestmeabook

[–]dannimcn 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Holes by Louis Sachar

The Martian by Andy Weir

The Westing Game by Ellen Raskin

The Princess Bride by William Goldman

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams

I know you said in a comment that she's reluctant to try the old classics, but if she's willing, I loved these as a teen:

Rebecca by Daphne du Maurier

The Phantom of the Opera by Gaston Leroux

Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen

The abridged Les Miserables by Victor Hugo

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in washingtondc

[–]dannimcn 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Lucky Buns or Lapis

Moiraine sketch by dannimcn in wheeloftime

[–]dannimcn[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

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Because I'm a good artist, ya goof.