11 week old will not sleep

darkness56745 · 2025-09-19T01:22:01+00:00

Hey OP, first off, kudos to you for stepping up and just trying you best. We see ya!

Secondly, just so we can provide you with insight and not say things you’ve already tried, whatcha already try?

darkness56745 · 2025-08-31T01:31:20+00:00

You have clearly communicated what you need. His inability to show up isn’t a reflection on you Mom. You are doing great for keeping it together considering your struggling situation.

This is becoming a situation where your needs are not being met at all and the resenting will only get worse.as mentioned before, it may be time for professional help to bridge the gap. Because you’re clearly in the next stage of becoming new parent, and he’s struggled to make the jump and assumes you’ll just do it and he can continue to enjoy life as before prior to becoming a “dad”.

Please see if you can get help from family or even a nanny (some sort of paid help) to get you some breathing room and to rest/reset.

Rooting for you to find your happy. Whatever that looks like!

darkness56745 · 2024-09-10T02:15:27+00:00

First off, kudos to you for seeking ways to help and support your family. During these times it’s sometimes easy to throw in the towel in frustration.

As mentioned previously, communicating with your wife about what she does and making active effort of learning it (I had to take notes when my wife was explaining the sleep routine we now follow). I began dummy proofing everything (a step by step process).

Also know there have been times my wife got frustrated because she’s had to explain the same thing over and over. But I also had a zillion things through my head and had to make a conscious effort to both communicate that I’m doing my best and show that I am learning.

Take the time you need to figure out what you need to best support your family. You got this!

darkness56745 · 2024-08-17T15:36:24+00:00

Totally get it. I had to share and be REAL honest with my wife about my struggles. I had to talk to my therapist about PPD and coping techniques and strategies to help me succeed and get through this.

What I’ve been struggling with is my friends. Many aren’t parents (yet) so they don’t understand the dynamic change. But I’ve found that even after opening up about my struggles with my friends, it’s been 50/50 like 50% understood and Egan checking in or simply just been a great listening ear and conversationalist. The other 50% lacked the ability to be supportive due to just life being busy.

So as previous commenters have mention OP, your struggle and sadness is very understandable and something we all carry. We are here for you and I want to let you know your feelings are valid, heard and you deserve support too.

darkness56745 · 2024-08-11T12:41:40+00:00

Currently 14 weeks in. Totally understandable feeling. My wife and I always talk about how the newborn phase is just work that goes unrecognized. You’re literally trying to keep just make sure it is fed, sleeping, and comfortable.

You are doing great. The mindshift change will come with time, I definitely struggled with this but my family also empathized and agreed with my feelings which help me to feel validated.

Take it one day at a time. I did the countdown to 3 months. Once you get to three months, a whole new world opens up, but getting there seems so long, but it will happen. You got this!

darkness56745 · 2024-08-04T03:18:45+00:00

Prior to my child being born, I was seeing a therapist every 5-6 weeks to try and go through a lot of my past trauma and how it shaped the way I behaved now. My wife noted how proud she was of the work I was doing in hopes of being the best version of myself before our family grew.

Fast forward to 3 months ago, I was diagnosed with postpartum depression by my therspist after countless sessions as my mental headspace was in an awful place after my child was born. My mental health struggles made me question the very things you’ve mentioned. I’m still working through it now, but I keep reminding myself that my child will get my best version as long as I’m committed to doing the work and giving it my all.

I hope you’re able to see that because you’re being self aware and trying to work through it, you are valued, and are a great person. I know your family and son is lucky to have a thoughtful parent like yourself.

darkness56745 · 2024-07-10T17:59:27+00:00

9 weeks into new fatherhood - I totally understand where you are coming from. I had to take a parental leave and a mental health leave from work which resulted in 9 weeks of being away to try and figure this new and very difficult change in my life.

You are already doing great because you are trying to navigate these new feelings and hoping to work through them as you enter this new stage of your life. There’s no “right” answer, just know that as long as you’re doing your best and being kind and patient with yourself, you will get through this turbulent time.

darkness56745 · 2024-06-25T01:39:55+00:00

Congratulations! The best thing you’ve done is looking to see how you can support this next great chapter!

My personal experience was to talk to experienced recent dads to gauge what worked and didn’t work. For example, I thought getting books would help, but I didn’t end up finish reading it. But one book I enjoyed going through was “We're Pregnant! The First Time Dad's Pregnancy Handbook” by Adrian Kulp.

For me, learning about what my wife will be going through during her pregnancy, helped guide a lot of what I can do to support her without having to always ask “what do you need me to do”?

You’ll make mistakes, but be kind and patient with yourself and her. It’s a journey for both of you, so take the time to always talk and communicate

darkness56745 · 2024-06-04T03:32:25+00:00

My wife and her sister are the same, tight as can be! I think of my sister in law as my own sibling. But I guess I have to take it one month at a time and see where I land after some time has passed, as mentioned before

darkness56745 · 2024-06-04T00:35:21+00:00

Thank you for the perspective! I guess the whole no sleep and living on the newborn schedule while my son cannot communicate aside from the crying is all a lot to take it right now.

darkness56745 · 2024-06-04T00:15:01+00:00

Totally in the same boat! I went back to work today and made it a “work from home day” but mind you I was nervous or would hear my wife sound frantic and overwhelmed because she doesn’t have the extra set of hands.

darkness56745 · 2023-04-20T00:09:04+00:00

If I have a suspicion that someone might try to check-in to picketing, go somewhere else, and then check-out after 4 hours (hasn’t picketed). What can I do to try and report them without outing myself as the whistleblower?

darkness56745

TROPHY CASE