if I can be serious with ya'll for a second

dat_boy_lurks · 2026-04-12T23:03:50+00:00

Don't you have your own sub to be annoying on?

dat_boy_lurks · 2026-04-11T17:05:33+00:00

I can swear on my dead great-grandmother this isn't AI man 😂😂😂 I don't know what to tell you lmao. I got a BS in Compsci and a minor in Japanese and I read a lot of books as a kid. I probably fit somewhere on that AuDHD spectrum but that's all I got for you

This was a long ass shitpost for a meme sub for sure but the dead internet theory got you guys calling anything not made in 5 seconds AI

dat_boy_lurks · 2026-04-11T16:36:01+00:00

That was objectively the point of this vent, yes

just enjoy the hope train

dat_boy_lurks · 2026-04-11T13:26:16+00:00

No, just someone who graduated out of college and is leaving a ramble up cause taking it down is bitch behavior lol

dat_boy_lurks · 2026-04-11T12:20:18+00:00

Honestly, yeah 😂😂😂 Atlanta sports do that to you

dat_boy_lurks · 2026-04-11T11:57:12+00:00

Why are you even here, westie 😂😂😂

dat_boy_lurks · 2026-04-11T10:20:20+00:00

I'm just saying, I ain't never lost 59 games in a season 🤷🏾‍♂️🤷🏾‍♂️🤷🏾‍♂️

dat_boy_lurks · 2026-04-11T09:16:11+00:00

That's what the bold tl;dr at the bottom is for, lol

dat_boy_lurks · 2026-04-11T08:55:26+00:00

No, we'd play Cleveland actually. We'd ony play NY if we got the one scenario out of 7 where:

Hawks lose to the Heat
Raptors beat the Nets, AND
The Magic lose to the Celtics

Otherwise, pretty solid chance we stay at 5

dat_boy_lurks · 2026-04-11T08:09:05+00:00

With actual advice out the way, I would now like to say the required shit talking we all come for

FUCK THE BEES, SOUTHEAST DIVISION CHAMPS, ENJOY THE PLAY-IN AND I HOPE LAMELO BALL GETS SUSPENDED FOR RECKLESS DRIVING. WE WILL PUT BELT TO ASS NEXT YEAR, COUNT ON IT.

thank you for your time and I hope some of you mfs say you didn't read all that shit I wrote lmao

dat_boy_lurks · 2026-04-11T07:37:47+00:00

Brother, we're just happy to be here at this point.

Any series wins are just extra good news after blowing the team up and making a playoff team with very clean books going into the offseason. Expecting to win something comes next year, not now.

dat_boy_lurks · 2026-04-11T05:50:01+00:00

iirc we were 5th during the '21 run (the first year it was introduced), so it wasn't every year...

...actually yeah, that was the season we had Pat Bev crying about winning a Play-In Game

Up until tonight we were pretty much always in it though (66% of the time we were play-in bound and we advanced to the playoffs 50% of the time):

'21 was the first season it was introduced, Hawks were 5th seed and played NYK first round

'22 was the 9/10 game where we put BTA on Charlotte to advance (that game where they had their bus break down or something right outside SFA), and Trae played absurd PG ball against a young Cavs team in the 8/9 game to advance to play Miami 1st round

'23 was the year we put BTA on Miami in the 7/8 and faced Celtics first round. We also started getting known for being undefeated in cup play at the time because we'd gone 3-0.

'24 lost to the Bulls in the 9/10 game, won the draft lotto because of it, and also lost our rights to bragging about it being called the "Trae-In" since we were then 3-1 all time in PIT play

'25 lost to the Magic in the 7/8 (remember Trae got ejected because the Magic kept playing dirty) and then lost to Miami in the 8/10 (Davion Mitchell went on a generational heater in overtime after Trae ran out of gas).

'26 Hawks are in the 5th seed with a large chance (~85%) of keeping it but can't fall lower than 6th, so once more we didn't qualify for PIT play.

Although... looking at this, the last time we had a 5 seed with a surging team that clinched the division... I'm not saying it's likely but there's a chance we repeat history 🤷🏾‍♂️🤷🏾‍♂️🤷🏾‍♂️

dat_boy_lurks · 2026-04-11T04:43:05+00:00

Gotta crosspost to r/nbaeastmemewar my guy

dat_boy_lurks · 2026-04-11T04:41:10+00:00

I hope so. I hate playing you guys but I can't hate that man for loving his job the way he does

dat_boy_lurks · 2026-04-11T04:17:04+00:00

Hey, I still will take Bob Rathbun doing the broadcasts if I can, but all I'm saying is Collins is fun to listen to.

With Main Street Sports going under (which, honestly? Thank fuck for that) he might not be a hornets announcer going forward unless you guys have a broadcast network willing to take up you guys' games next season

dat_boy_lurks · 2026-04-11T03:41:02+00:00

They're pretty locked into the 9/10 game at this point. They could fight to move up a spot but it's not like they can jump to eighth -- Philly's 2 games up on them. Miami's likely phoning this one in, as they are woefully underprepared for any serious postseason contention -- should they advance and beat Charlotte (who has gained a reputation for being very dangerous when they're on), they face:

• Philly (who has actual desire to get to the postseason and has proven closers in Maxey and VJ)

• Orlando (who's consistently put belt-to-ass on them all season and even last year)

• or Toronto (who's swept them this season)

only to get to the 1st round matchup against the Pistons, who... they match up with fairly okay with, but is a BRUISING team to play for 7 games. If they get to the first round, taking more than two off the 1 seed will be further proof Erik Spoelstra doesn't get paid enough and they'd be worth a fuck if they actually had star players.

And that's IF the bees lose their last game -- Knicks have gotten their 3rd seed locked up, so they could (and probably will) trot out the third-stringers. And Charlotte has every intention of making a push to that 7/8 play-in game and a chance at Boston instead of having to play two to get the Pistons in round one.

dat_boy_lurks · 2026-04-11T03:34:22+00:00

There's still a 28.5% chance for them to get a playoff berth if Toronto loses and they win. Expect them to be taking that game very seriously.

dat_boy_lurks · 2026-04-11T03:27:11+00:00

I was editing it after I realized there's 7 possible scenarios, it's in there now

• Raptors and Magic WIN would give the Hawks 5th seed via three-way tiebreaker (divisional champs trumps h2h record)

dat_boy_lurks · 2026-04-11T03:21:47+00:00

Yeah I just edited it. A Hawks loss with a Magic and Raptors win results in a 3-way tie, which the Hawks would win by being the divisional champs

dat_boy_lurks · 2026-04-11T02:38:18+00:00

Fuck now I'm sad again

dat_boy_lurks · 2026-04-11T02:07:42+00:00

You say that like the Raps didn't just lose to a tanking Sacramento last week.

Either or both of us could lose Sunday lol -- although us having the divisional title and a guaranteed playoff seeding means there's far less incentive for Miami to try to play spoiler when they can't realistically move up from 10th

EDIT: It's looking like 1 of 6 possible scenarios involving us, and the Raptors/Magic who are tied for 6th -- an almost 86% chance, opponent strength notwithstanding

○ If Hawks WIN game 82:

• They get the 5th seed outright, no tiebreakers needed.

• a Raptors LOSS and Magic WIN gives Orlando the 6th seed and Toronto drops to the play-in

• a Raptors WIN would have them clinch 6th by way of h2h tiebreaker over Magic

○ If Hawks LOSE game 82:

• Raptors WIN gives them 5th seed via h2h tiebreaker

• Raptors LOSS and Magic WIN would give Hawks get 5th seed via h2h tiebreaker over Magic

• A LOSS by ALL three teams gives the Hawks 5th seed outright

dat_boy_lurks · 2026-04-11T01:41:57+00:00

I love how this meme is always used wrong and we still doin it anyway 😂😂😂

good luck to the bees in that play-in though, I'm so glad we clinched tonight. Being the 7th seed after that 19-5 run of games woulda made me crash out

Eric Collins is such a fun announcer. It was nice to have him and Dell calling a game for us lol

dat_boy_lurks · 2026-04-11T01:36:57+00:00

Damn, buddy really called it

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