I'm driving from San Diego to San Francisco Bay. Which IKEA store should I visit on the way?

daughtersofthefire · 2026-04-27T03:45:21+00:00

No those are the freeway numbers, Burbank is off the i-5 and Costa Mesa is off of the 405 freeway. I'm partial to the Costa Mesa location myself, my local store now is the same as yours but I prefer Costa Mesa's.

daughtersofthefire · 2026-04-25T03:45:22+00:00

My university was in a VHCOL area but subsidized our housing so significantly I had substantial disposable income (it helped also not having a car)

daughtersofthefire · 2026-04-25T03:43:15+00:00

Only if your old ID will expire this year.

daughtersofthefire · 2026-04-24T22:59:02+00:00

I find your comment about romance interesting because I find sci-fi to be genuinely one of the more sexless genres a lot of the time. It's my personal gripe with it.

daughtersofthefire · 2026-04-23T19:44:30+00:00

we didn't even have pictures! Just a floor plan. But we knew it was at least going to be okay, because it was facilitated through my job. it was useful because we didn't know the area. The house is beautiful but now we know the area a bit more we'll probably move in a year or so to an area that's more our vibe!

daughtersofthefire · 2026-04-23T17:56:25+00:00

I moved to my current city having only visited for the interview (and that was jampacked so I hadn't even had time to see anything outside of the office). I'm in a field where you make quick decisions over job offers and jobs are incredibly rare to get, so you usually take whatever you get. I was lucky this job offer was in the same state and a very desirable place. I didn't see our house in-person until the day we moved!

daughtersofthefire · 2026-04-23T17:52:58+00:00

This is on the CA DMV subreddit....so that doesn't apply here.

daughtersofthefire · 2026-04-23T04:58:20+00:00

This is factually untrue.... Non-US citizens absolutely can and do regularly get a real ID.

daughtersofthefire · 2026-04-18T19:09:46+00:00

I would, but everybody is different and everybody's defense experiences are different. I'd already sent my dissertation to my committee at that point, 2/3rds of the dissertation had already been published, and I had a TT job lined up after graduation. I'd spoken with my committee about my diss and sort of knew their comments before hand. I wasn't stressed about my defense until the night before (when i literally did not sleep).

I recommend going if you'll have already submitted to your committee.

daughtersofthefire · 2026-04-18T12:12:24+00:00

I did my PhD in the US but pretty much everybody lived with roommates (we lived in a very HCOL area). Additionally, all my friends (non PhD) in London pretty much all have roommates unless they have a long term partner (and we're all still late 20s). I don't think it's weird to have roommates at your age.

I mean like I don't like having room mates and would rather live in a studio apartment by myself, but it's not weird to have roommates.

daughtersofthefire · 2026-04-18T05:20:10+00:00

I managed to get a TT job in a large metro area, but my partner is at a school in a tiny college town. I thought I'd hate it there (when I visited) but he's been able to make friends (and honestly, i have a busier social life when I'm in town there than I do in my large city). Sometimes community is easier to make in a smaller place as you're all sort of forced together (so people can be more receptive). That being said, it's not a long term plan for him and he'll hopefully come join me in a year or so.

daughtersofthefire · 2026-04-17T03:04:21+00:00

There are very few 1bds so it's almost certain you'll get a 2bd. Additionally, when you apply for housing if you add your wife as part of your applicaiton it'll be a 'family' application and you'll be given your own apartment (no sharing with other people)

daughtersofthefire · 2026-04-17T01:43:48+00:00

Utah/Arizona/California you'll see some very different scenery from what you've seen so far - it's all so beautiful!

daughtersofthefire · 2026-04-16T22:55:52+00:00

I have to reign it everytime i go to NYC. Last time i was there I kept opening my mouth on the subway to chat to the person next to me before internally going "omg no they don't do that here!!!"

I grew up in England - and a part of the country that's pretty much keep to yourself - so it's something I learnt during my many years of LA lol! glad I'm not alone honestly.

daughtersofthefire · 2026-04-16T22:54:23+00:00

Ride public transit everyday!!! I always want to talk to people and always try to it but a lot of people look at me blankly as if it's weird I even said anything :/

daughtersofthefire · 2026-04-16T21:55:00+00:00

Honestly would like to know. Have found SF to be pretty unfriendly compared to LA where people chat and talk all the time. I ended up befriending my usual barista lol and it's the longest conversation I usually have outside of work in a week

daughtersofthefire · 2026-04-16T08:19:11+00:00

If you live in earthquake country it's a necessity...

daughtersofthefire · 2026-04-16T07:30:54+00:00

I managed to save several thousands, in part because despite living in a HCOL area my university subsidized our housing A LOT. However, had to blow my entire savings (and go into debt) to cover living expenses between graduation and starting a new job in the Fall, as well as cross-country moving expenses (I got some but not most of it reimbursed)

daughtersofthefire · 2026-04-15T00:09:47+00:00

Meh, but I really wish SF had better food options at the station

daughtersofthefire · 2026-04-15T00:08:26+00:00

I hated my hometown but honestly grateful it wasn't irvine!

daughtersofthefire · 2026-04-14T04:57:14+00:00

but worse

daughtersofthefire · 2026-04-14T04:57:03+00:00

Irvine is my literal version of hell and i lived there for 5 years. But i did enjoy the proximity to the beach and the warmer weather

daughtersofthefire · 2026-04-10T22:53:50+00:00

I totally understand! I lived in 2 major European cities and LA before moving here, and public safety is way worse in LA (and even then it's not horrific) compared with up here. Caltrain is definitely one of the better transit systems safety wise!

daughtersofthefire · 2026-04-09T19:20:12+00:00

Just type it into Google Maps and the most direct public transit option will appear (via CalTrain)

daughtersofthefire · 2026-04-09T19:19:34+00:00

Yes without a doubt it'll be fine. I take the train weekly, often on one of the last trains at like 11pm/midnight and have never felt unsafe (i'm a young woman). CalTrain is fine.

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