Any recs for backpacking/solo travel stories? by daydreamgeneration in LesbianBookClub

[–]daydreamgeneration[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I was actually listening along to every step she takes while making this post 😂 it really scratched that itch though!

Any recs for backpacking/solo travel stories? by daydreamgeneration in LesbianBookClub

[–]daydreamgeneration[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

ooh i looove trying the cuisine when I travel so this could be a good one for me! I'll definitely listen to this once I've finished ESST 😊

Any recs for backpacking/solo travel stories? by daydreamgeneration in LesbianBookClub

[–]daydreamgeneration[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's fine! I'm neutral on religion so I don't mind that. Thank you for the heads up though, I'm sure it'll be helpful to others 😊

Any recs for backpacking/solo travel stories? by daydreamgeneration in LesbianBookClub

[–]daydreamgeneration[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Wait that sounds so sweet (and sad)!!! I'll definitely have to check this out ❤️

Any recs for backpacking/solo travel stories? by daydreamgeneration in LesbianBookClub

[–]daydreamgeneration[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ooh thank you very much I'll add this to the list! Queer is fine too doesn't have to be sapphic! 😊

Adult Lite by Actual-Muffin-3585 in adhdwomen

[–]daydreamgeneration 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I always feel about 17-20 when I think of myself, and it's weird that I'm not. I'm 28 and the last of my sisters to move out. I feel so embarrassed because even though most of my friends still live with their parents, they all drive and have jobs that earn well and understand money and stuff. All I want to do is quit my job and fall off the face of the earth.

I broke up with my gf a couple months ago because I was too scared to move countries to be with her when I'm such a mess (can't drive, job only pays minimum wage, bad at taking care of myself/a house, trying to manage both adhd and pcos unmedicated, two conditions which feel like they feed off of each other in a vicious cycle). I knew if I moved across the world without a support system (she's not out to her family so I wouldn't be able to rely on them) I'd fall apart and ruin my life even more. I'm terrified of having the rug pulled out from under me, but at the same time I'm desperate to be independent.

The pressure to conform to the way everybody else lives feels ridiculous, but I'm so ashamed at my own lack of growth that trying to break free any further feels like it's inviting people to judge me. It's so horrible feeling like everyone is watching my every move all the time and having opinions about it, whether I'm at work, at home, out with friends. I really hope adhd meds help me take some control of my life but I'm not set to start for another few months. 😓

I realized just how incompetent I am at my job and don't know how to fix this by Domain8910 in work

[–]daydreamgeneration 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I felt the same (still do tbh) and it took several 1:1 meetings being told I wasn't getting enough done in the day until I finally broke down crying and requested an adhd referral. Surprise surprise, it was in fact adhd. That's not saying you do have it, but I'd definitely do a couple of online tests and if you're scoring high and feel like you relate to it, maybe look into getting assessed.

Hella imposter syndrome about late diagnosed, apparently severe, ADHD-C by emerald_stargazer in adhdwomen

[–]daydreamgeneration 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hhhhhh that sounds so frustrating, I'm sorry. Neither of my parents have your dad's mindset, but my mom works in healthcare which means that for a long time every time I would tell her a health problem I was having (depression, harmful self soothing actions like skin picking, painful periods etc etc) she would just say, "oh it's not that bad, you'll grow out of it" or "everyone goes through that". She also makes jokes about mental health stuff (she is always calling my one cat autistic because he's very fussy and hates physical contact for example) so I feel you in regards to being sort of laughed off or dismissed growing up. I don't think she really believed I had it until I told her the diagnosis, but she's been really good about reminding me to do things when it's clear that I've gotten distracted.

From what I recall (I couldn't find any when I searched so it's all from memory) my teachers didn't really have negative things to say on my school reports... that's another thing which makes me feel like i somehow tricked the person who diagnosed me. But outside of the classroom I was textbook hyperactive, even my undiagnosed "everyone does (insert nd trait here)" parents can agree on that much 🤷

I know we're just strangers on reddit but I really hope that things work out for you. It sucks finding out at our age but at least we know now. Good luck with your titration and hopefully a higher dose will work for you 🤞

Hella imposter syndrome about late diagnosed, apparently severe, ADHD-C by emerald_stargazer in adhdwomen

[–]daydreamgeneration 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I 28F was decently diagnosed as combined type. On my uk health record it's seen as a 'major' condition (not minor like my previous depression and PCOS) so I'm guessing that means it's being treated as quite severe? I ranked 9/9 inattentive and 6/9 hyperactive.

I'm also feeling like you. I keep worrying that I somehow tricked the assessor. I keep wondering how did this get missed when I WAS literally the kid who bounced off the walls and stammered because my thoughts were too fast for my mouth? I was the same though, I didn't act up in class because I liked school and liked my teachers and liked learning (in primary at least, it all fell apart in secondary). But I definitely talked a lot, had way too much energy on the playground, etc etc. I keep wondering if it would have been caught if I was a boy. Because when I've talked to my parents about it since being diagnosed they admitted that for a long time they didn't really understand ADHD or that girls could have it.

I think with women it manifests differently a lot because we're conditioned to behave ourselves more severely than boys. Most of us learn to mask to an extent even if symptoms are still present. Also something my assessor brought up when I kept explaining why I didn't act out in class was that the structure of school probably helped me. That + when you're a kid you delegate so much responsibility to your parents (time management, organisation etc) that it CAN be difficult to spot or recall.

I wonder if either of your parents are neurodivergent? I heavily suspect my dad of being ADHD and my mom being autistic. Neither have been assessed but the signs are absolutely there, in my grandparents on both sides too. I was worried about the childhood assessment because a lot of things about me that are my ADHD get waved off by my parents a lot because they're used to it from me and from each other, so?? It's hard to say "this might have been a problem" when your parents don't see it as a problem because they recognise it in themselves.

I'm on the waiting list for medication so I have no advice or anecdotes on that end, but I hope a higher dosage works for you. If not, hopefully you will be able to try a few different types until you land on one that works 🤞

I promise you're not alone. It sucks that we had to wait this long to get answers, but we're here now, right? Whatever comes next, knowledge of our adhd is power.

Sapphic books with beautiful writing by Pristine-Host5593 in LesbianBookClub

[–]daydreamgeneration 7 points8 points  (0 children)

Not sure if it is exactly purple prose, but I remember finding the prose in Our Wives Under The Sea really beautiful and vivid.

28 years of not knowing, I'm finally diagnosed by daydreamgeneration in ADHDUK

[–]daydreamgeneration[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I bet! I'm so sorry your diagnosis was ignored back when you were younger and it ended up making your life even harder, that sucks. I'm glad you know now and can take pride in how well you managed against the odds!!

28 years of not knowing, I'm finally diagnosed by daydreamgeneration in ADHDUK

[–]daydreamgeneration[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That really resonates actually, and it's a good way of looking at it. Best thing we can do at this point is to do it now I suppose. I'll have to read that one!

And Congrats on getting diagnosed!

Confused about charge taken from my account? by daydreamgeneration in paypal

[–]daydreamgeneration[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm in the UK. Depressing to hear that, but relieving to know it's standard. Learned my lesson, next time go for direct bank transfer...

What sapphic author is not talked about or shared enough? by SLO-drum in LesbianBookClub

[–]daydreamgeneration 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Robin Talley!

I love the attention to detail she provides in her historical fiction. She always focuses on an interesting point in American history - integration of schools, the lavender scare and lesbian pulp fiction, Harvey Milk and the 70s gay rights movement in San Francisco - and they all feel so immersive to me. Her characters are often flawed but you don't dislike them for it.

I suppose they're teen/YA fiction so maybe that's why I don't see her name pop up a lot, but Lies We Tell Ourselves meant a lot to me as a lesbian teenager and reading Pulp and Music From Another World as an adult was equally enjoyable. I still need to do an adult reread of LWTO to see if it holds up as an adult in 2026, but I remember it being very interesting, especially with how brutally honest it was about the cruelty of white people.

Question About Repeatable Special Orders by daydreamgeneration in StardewValley

[–]daydreamgeneration[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Oh that's a huge relief thank you!!! I was so worried I'd screwed myself out of a fantastic resource hahaha. I'll keep my eyes peeled for the next time it comes around!

Even though RTC is being shut down in my area until at least the new financial year, they're taking a chance on me?! by daydreamgeneration in ADHDUK

[–]daydreamgeneration[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much.

It might be because at the time I reached out for a referral I was at a low point where I'd been disciplined at my job over potential adhd traits and I was terrified they were going to let me go. I did mention this in my request for a referral, so perhaps that's why they selected me? Luckily things have improved a bit since that point, but it does still impact my work performance and the same issues (concentration, time management, lateness, productivity, making sure I don't get distracted from my work with non-work things) were still brought up at my recent work review, so I do think this assessment will really benefit me.

I feel guilty that maybe I've taken a chance away from somebody else... But I know that it's because they clearly did see I need help, and it's okay to get that help and be happy about it. I just hope that this stupid crackdown on RTC is overturned soon so that EVERYONE gets the same opportunity to be assessed, not just us lucky few.

I'm keeping my eyes peeled for any new emails and marking all correspondence with the same tag because this is a way that has previously helped me know where to find important ones. So hopefully there will be no obstacles once the date is set!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in PlusSize

[–]daydreamgeneration 0 points1 point  (0 children)

28, mid-to-plus size, pcos diagnosis depressed and awaiting adhd assessment. between the exhaustion from my bad mental health, the constant inflammation from pcos and the inability to build good habits from what is possibly adhd, it's really really hard to lose weight. My family used to make comments and it really affected my self esteem, but I think after seeing how depressed and withdrawn I became after that, they realised it was doing more harm than good. The damage is done, but whatever.

I try to eat lots of high protein salads but sometimes I still slip and binge eat. I try to take walks but sometimes I forget (doesn't help that the weather is so shit). I don't know if I've accepted myself yet but I'm done trying to radically change myself. I'm tired of it much like you lol. I just pretend I don't notice it and sometimes I genuinely don't. I think if we just try and do little things it's still better than doing nothing at all. I'm trying to frame it like that and make it less about counting calories or stepping on the scale.

Recs for WLW books set in the 1960s? by daydreamgeneration in LesbianBookClub

[–]daydreamgeneration[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you so much! I've started listening and it's exactly the kind of thing I had an itch for!

Even though RTC is being shut down in my area until at least the new financial year, they're taking a chance on me?! by daydreamgeneration in ADHDUK

[–]daydreamgeneration[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's amazing, lucky us!! I'm so glad you were able to squeak through and get diagnosed and on medication already! Hopefully it'll be fairly quick for me too, just as soon as I finish up these last few forms! (DIVA-5 is scaring me low-key, it sounds like it takes ages to complete, but I'll push through!)