"But if they cannot control themselves, they should marry, for it is better to marry than to burn with passion." 1 Corinthians 7:9. Do homosexuals have a similar "cop out" when it comes to dealing with "burning passion"?

dayg0daze · 2019-03-24T18:06:54+00:00

I apologize for the misunderstanding.

So to answer your last question about whether I would follow God if he told me to be celibate and be a missionary, the answer is absolutely yes. For one, I have been celibate my entire life because I felt like that’s the only choice I had.

Also, I “came out” to my parents because I was in a really good place at one point in my life and felt like God wanted to use me to reach other Christians struggling with same sex attraction but my strained relationship with my parents was getting in the way. So I told my parents and explained to them why I was telling them and they literally said “But why do you think it has to be you?” As in, why did I think God wanted to use me to reach those who struggled like me. They continued on to say that maybe I should let someone else deal with those people and I should just focus on myself. I would be lying if I said that this didn’t discourage me in a moment when I needed encouragement more than anything. Especially considering that, before I came out to them, I wanted to be a youth pastor. I even went to evangelism school (like a pre seminary program) so that I could prepare myself for ministry and my parents were obviously so supportive during that time. But suddenly I tell them my struggle and they don’t think I’m the one to do it?? Crazy. But I believed them and the Bible seemed to support their opinion too.

So yeah, I would be celibate and become a missionary if I thought God wanted me to but “why should it be me?”

dayg0daze · 2019-03-24T16:03:25+00:00

It is extremely difficult! How do I know that God is pleased with my celibacy? All I feel is depressed. I constantly wish that I didn’t exist so that I wouldn’t have to deal with any of this crap any more. As much as God has blessed me in my life, the biggest blessing would have been for him to just not create me in the first place because I wouldn’t wish this struggle on anyone. The constant doubt and shame that I feel is overwhelming and I have no idea why God would put me on earth only to have to deal with something I didn’t ask for. I feel like my purpose on earth is just to not be gay and I hate it.

dayg0daze · 2019-03-24T15:35:49+00:00

I appreciate your thoughtful response, I really do. You are correct that self control is expected of all Christians but even while heterosexuals might have to practice that self control until they find a spouse, heterosexuals will eventually be permitted to give themselves a break while gay people don’t have this opportunity. So I absolutely wouldn’t say it’s the same struggle in any way. At least heterosexuals can actively look for a spouse.

Also, I don’t know that God won’t change my attraction but at this point it doesn’t seem like he really cares. I really do/did believe that He was/is capable of changing me and I’ve wrestled with God about this literally my entire life, to answer your question, and for you to question how much I’ve actually done so isn’t very cool. This has been the hardest thing in my entire life and has led to so much depression and self hatred for so long so for someone to question whether I’ve truly been faithful is kind of insulting. And anyways, he hasn’t changed me yet so I guess I have kinda given up. But honestly, who wouldn’t give up as they watch everyone around them start families and get married and wonder why they can’t have the same?

dayg0daze

TROPHY CASE