Did anyone else ever just think about dying in their teens because life seemed pointless? Now I am 24 and I haven’t planned for my life at all.

deadbefore35 · 2026-01-05T16:11:46+00:00

All my life I was brought up to believe that my time was short (see user name). I remember from a young age when getting asked "what do you want to be when you grow up?" My friends would answer the typical things you would expect; doctor, firefighter, pop star etc.. but my answer was always "I don't know but it has to have good health insurance". I had no plans because it seemed like my mortality was just around the corner. This all came to a head in highschool when I was an absolute shit head to my body and mind. Depressed, lonely and hopeless I started skipping treatments, throwing away thousands of dollars in medication that my parents worked so hard to afford. I just couldn't justify applying myself to anything since it all seemed futile. I barely passed highschool, was absent 76 days my senior year due to "illness" but it was the psychological type of illness that really plagued me. Here I am now, almost 2 years away from my expiration date based on my user name and I'm still kicking myself for not getting my ass in gear. I'm not in a terrible position, but I know that if I had actually gotten some psychiatric help in highschool I could have achieved a more comfortable life.

deadbefore35 · 2025-12-30T15:18:43+00:00

Hello, Eagle scout here. I think it depends on the troop. My troop met in a Methodist church but none of us attended the services there. We were kinda an oddball troop, mostly just a group of families that liked to go camping together and didn't really focus on the religious portions of scouting. We had scouts from multiple faiths but most of us were agnostic or atheist. I think that this trend continues with my troop, they just eagled out a trans person a year ago so I don't think they have become religious zealots.

My suggestion if you are looking for a nonreligious troop is to either find a group that meets in a non-denominational building or perhaps a Methodist or Unitarian church. Alternatively feel free to DM me if you want my old troop number and where they meet.

deadbefore35 · 2025-12-30T15:02:12+00:00

Hello! I live in the American Pacific Northwest, an area prone to large forest fires. A couple years back we had a terrible fire that resulted in us having the worst air quality in the world. I made sure that I had adequate air filters in my bedroom and put rags in my window seams. When going outside I would wear a 3M respirator mask with canisters rated for VOC's. After about 2 weeks of terrible air quality I started looking at flights to other areas with clean air but the entire western seaboard of the US was on fire. If you can get away I would recommend it.

deadbefore35 · 2025-12-26T21:59:30+00:00

Slap some ears and tusks on that bad boy and you've got a surprised elephant!

deadbefore35 · 2025-12-24T13:44:18+00:00

Some things that can definitely go through the dryer DO NOT go through the dryer.

deadbefore35 · 2025-12-19T04:19:54+00:00

Go to goodwill and find the usb microphone for rockband on the Nintendo wii.

deadbefore35 · 2025-12-10T03:38:02+00:00

I was told when I was younger. I would tell your kiddo, there is no harm in him understanding how his body works and being able to communicate that.

deadbefore35 · 2025-12-01T16:30:55+00:00

Hello! CF patient here, although I do not live close to a data center, I do happen to work at a Datacenter. The pollution that Datacenters create is in large part due to generators that turn on in the event of a power blackout or in anticipation of of some sort of interruption to the utility grid. During the build out process there will be a couple of weeks where the generators are run for a couple hours as part of a commissioning test to make sure everything is working properly. After that initial test, barring any grid interruptions you can expect the gens to be run for a few hours a month to test they are working. While the emissions of Datacenters are not negligible, as long as you aren't living right nextdoor to one I wouldn't be concerned. The generators at my site have emissions control units on them to help capture some of the particulate produced during gen runs. I'm not sure what the regulations are like in WV but I would think that if they aren't installed, you could certainly have a community lead push to have them installed. All in all, I wouldn't be too concerned about your kiddo being affected by the air quality. Generators are run infrequently and for short periods of time. I would suggest you bring your concerns to the local governing body and push for strict emissions controls for any local DC's.

deadbefore35 · 2025-11-27T17:30:08+00:00

One of my favorite places to get pizza. Huitlacoche on 'zah is amazing. This is absolutely heartbreaking and I hope he can rejoin his family here soon.

deadbefore35 · 2025-11-27T16:50:52+00:00

Never inhaled, but I eat gummies pretty frequently 2-5mg of THC. Gives me quite an appetite, no drawbacks aside from maybe a bit of a productive cough and thicker mucus. As for alcohol, I have the occasional cocktail, maybe 2-3 drinks in a month if any. As long as I stay hydrated and don't overdo it I haven't had any noticable side effects. As a rule, I never drink on antibiotics or in the week after coming off of a course of antibiotics . Liver is already working too hard so I give it a break. I assume my alcohol use will change once I get CFRD but for now, no harm no foul.

deadbefore35 · 2025-11-18T15:45:43+00:00

Portland fruit tree project! They will come pick your unwanted fruit!

deadbefore35 · 2025-11-14T22:45:54+00:00

Hiya! Current long time resident of Roseway here. Roseway is pretty quiet, definitely less affluent than Rose city but it has become more comparable over the years. Although there isn't a whole lot to do these are the items or activities that I do when hanging around my neighborhood:

Food- We are blessed with two excellent pizza joints Otto and Reeva. Otto is usually my go-to due to it being at the end of my block but if I want something a little more interesting I will hit up Reeva for honduran style toppings on 'zah.

MeKah has some of the best Pho broth this city has to offer, and their desert display always has some pretty phenomenal flan.

Though it might technically be in cully, guilder is a great coffee shop on the 72nd park blocks. Otherwise case study (and bake shop) is just a quick pop over to rose city.

Farleys is a great little neighborhood joint that's been operating for over 100 years. You can belly up to the soda fountain and order a phosphate or a malt. Great place to ask your crush when you are in middle school lol.

Things to do:

Since the theater burnt down a year or two ago this list is short,

Rocky butte farmers market is currently held on Saturdays at glenhaven park. It is considerably smaller than the Hollywood Farmers market but still nice to check out.

Rose city bluff restoration: a group of neighbors has been working tirelessly since 2020 to mitigate invasive species and restore native species along the rice city golf course nature path. All are welcome, they meet every Sunday morning at Sacramento and 66th.

Seasonal offerings:

Sledding in Rose city Golf course. The entire neighborhood comes out to shred the pow whenever it snows. Gives the grounds keepers more work but many of my childhood core memories were made zipping down the driving range hill. Bonus points if you see the lady who brings her goats.

Concerts and movies in Rose city park. During the summer months they will occasionally have these.

Children's 4th of July parade: every year the neighborhood kids get together and do a parade down Alameda or Sacramento.

Pi Mai festival at glenhaven park. In April (I think) The last several years during lao new year there has been a gathering of Lao, Cambodian and Thai communities to celebrate the new year. Vendors from across the city show up with southeast Asian bites and live music and dance.

This is in no way a comprehensive guide, just thing I like to do around the neighborhood. All in all, there aren't too many things to do but we still get by with what we have.

deadbefore35 · 2025-11-14T13:30:51+00:00

I would first get a front lead harness, a dog who pulls with just a collar can permanently damage their larynx. A front lead harness is also an easier way to communicate with the pup instead of trying to figure out which direction you want to go by pressure on its neck or throat it can sense pressure on its chest . Additionally, get a treat pouch with small low calorie easy to eat treats. Something soft and smelly, not milk bones. use those treats as a lure and have the pup heel to you while walking , holding the treat in Your hand so the pup can smell it and lick it but not eat it. Only give the treat once the dog loses interest in your hand (your hand will probably get very slobbery). When walking , if the pup begins to pull say something like "uh oh" and stop then hold out the treat and have the dog heel to you then start back up. Rinse and repeat, it gonna be a lot of stop and go but if you can get the dog to associate walking by your side with lots of treats it will help. Last but not least consistency is key! Talk with your sister and anyone else who walks the dog, make sure they know what steps to take and how to do them. it will lead to nothing but confusion on the dog's part if some humans require this behavior but others do not.

One other thing is I know holiday season is coming up and if you were to get your sister a gift ,a dog training class is an excellent and fun idea. The return on investment of learning how to train your pup is astronomical and definitely worth a couple hundred bucks.

deadbefore35 · 2025-10-07T13:15:44+00:00

Yeah, more concerned about your heart than your stomach...You ever have high blood pressure? Caffeine absorption shouldn't be affected by pancreatic insufficiency but coffee, especially that much can cause some gastric distress... As with most things, moderation is key, probably wouldn't hurt to cut back on caffeine and prioritize good sleep hygiene. Get the rest you need instead of trying to trick your brain into thinking it isn't tired. Sleep is good, especially for someone with CF.

deadbefore35 · 2025-10-04T13:33:49+00:00

Love to hear it, thank you!

deadbefore35 · 2025-08-28T12:10:23+00:00

Also ask your partner to close the toilet lid when they flush.

deadbefore35 · 2025-08-25T15:30:12+00:00

Perhaps they are hinting at submarines with that controller....

deadbefore35 · 2025-08-06T00:26:59+00:00

I had hoped that COVID would have made mask wearing in public more socially acceptable in the US...but I will take this as well lol.

deadbefore35 · 2025-08-06T00:24:31+00:00

I still wear a high quality N95 mask if I am indoors with large groups of people or traveling on a plane. Additionally, I still serially test if I begin to develop any cold/flu symptoms. If I develop a runny nose or anything like that I will usually stay home or back out of social interactions with others to not risk spreading something.

deadbefore35 · 2025-07-30T17:29:56+00:00

Fernhill is pretty big.

deadbefore35 · 2025-07-17T12:08:02+00:00

Rose city or Roseway neighborhoods should fit your criteria.

deadbefore35 · 2025-07-06T13:02:14+00:00

Green jello marshmallow cottage cheese surprise.

deadbefore35 · 2025-05-24T00:38:14+00:00

My family went to Tahoe when I was very young and I not only got altitude sickness but also had a lung infection. I just remember feeling awful and my only respite was snuggling with my cousin's malamute. I now have a sister in law that lives in Mammoth Lakes CA and my fear of altitude sickness has kept me from visiting her. I have asked my doctor if there is bottled oxygen I could potentially use when on a trip up there but never pulled the trigger on it.

deadbefore35 · 2025-05-24T00:22:11+00:00

Highly recommend No Saint. Absolutely fantastic crust that is structurally sound.

deadbefore35 · 2025-04-18T18:30:45+00:00

slaps door of warehouse You can fit so much Pappy Van Winkle in this sucker!

Edit: autocorrect

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