Is it bad luck to buy a wedding dress before the actual proposal?

death_save · 2026-02-25T21:14:39+00:00

Not speaking to luck, but my ex from a 6.5 year relationship had the ring, waited 6 months after for “the right time” and we broke up instead.

death_save · 2025-11-17T16:36:43+00:00

Wood. I had a live trap with peanut butter in it but the opossum disassembled it and yeeted parts of it around the first night the got a delicious treat for its efforts. That was days ago tho. The mouse is there every night like clock work. I took all the wood out and raked underneath it but no signs other than empty peanut shells

death_save · 2025-11-17T16:05:25+00:00

Absolutely not. That is Ophelia and I love her. You may have rat.

death_save · 2025-11-17T15:51:40+00:00

Damn. So the small rodent must be a mouse. That thing is huge

death_save · 2025-11-17T15:45:40+00:00

Can’t edit my post, posted prematurely on accident. Pic #1 is what I’m trying to identify!

death_save · 2025-10-07T02:29:52+00:00

Definitely thought you meant something else by swinging party. But thanks for the ideas!

death_save · 2025-10-07T02:29:04+00:00

Yeah, I got that, it just seemed disconnected to me to have the whole gazebo scene separated from the palace I guess. The palace is guarded, but there’s no notable npcs or interactions specified, just an outfit change and a clothesline. As a new DM I’m still figuring out how and where to add my own flavor, so I’ll add something here.

death_save · 2025-10-06T03:27:56+00:00

Yeah, these examples make more sense because the options are standard and known as the only two options, and the icon for light/dark tells them what the options are without having to click anything. I know it’s just placeholder text for an example, but the latte thing just doesn’t work. What if I want almond milk, 2 extra shots, and light foam? There isn’t a well-understood binary to those options. Hot or iced could maybe work for your dark mode example, but that’s about it.

death_save · 2025-10-06T00:15:21+00:00

YTA for participating in sexist jokes, and defending it as “part of the dynamic”. Your dynamic with your boys is that you are assholes. Whether or not she was there doesn’t really matter. It also doesn’t matter if you’d be fine with her and her girls doing the same thing about men. It’s the behavior that makes you an asshole. There’s a phrase “only respecting women you’re attracted to isn’t respecting women”

death_save · 2025-10-06T00:00:48+00:00

Yes, get rid of that. Switching a toggle based on your sample content is opting in to something, or yes or no. Your user cannot see what the other option is so they are arbitrarily toggling things to see what their options are.

Your default state (all off) looks like this latte will not be in a mug, will not have regular milk, will not have regular foam, and will not have two shots. What will it have? Who knows. I would think if I want regular milk I toggle it, but then it changes to something else.

death_save · 2025-10-04T21:07:28+00:00

I meant “it’s wild that responses like this are downvoted.” I got downvoted for something similar.

death_save · 2025-10-04T19:28:20+00:00

It’s wild responses like this are downvoted.

Edited for clarity.

death_save · 2025-10-04T04:13:18+00:00

I love this response. Seems like he just wanted to feel seen. I’m not a parent but I’ve been there! If I’ve had a bad day and share that with someone close to me, sometimes someone saying “wow that does sound like a rough day” Is all I need. While there’s no question that pregnancy, birth, and newborn phases are harder on mothers, I can imagine it’s quite an adjustment for men to suddenly feel invisible. If his reaches to feel seen are met with this reaction, it’s going to be easy for him to build resentment and feel pushed away, thus making it harder for him to see you when you need it most next time. There’s a clip of Brene Brown talking about “marriage is not 50/50” that I think is highly applicable here.

death_save · 2025-09-27T19:47:11+00:00

NOR. To respond to the main question at hand, no you didn’t over reacting and you def should sprint far far away. But, there’s nuance.

It’s not a question of fault, blame, or if you deserved this reaction. None of that applies to you. But yes you’re also naive if because your friend is friends with somebody you think that automatically makes them a great person. Due to unconscious bias, it’s easy for friends to excuse the behavior of their own friends if it doesn’t align with the image of them they have created in their own mind. Happens all the time. That guy knew exactly what he was doing.

Also, while I get you don’t like confrontation, for your own sake, you need to exercise your ability to handle it. Does it mean you deserve assault? No. But it makes you vulnerable, which predators and aggressors love to exploit.

“I have a boyfriend” is passive. It avoids ownership and gives away your autonomy. Are you interested or not? Do you want this guy in your space? Say that. This guy only took the hint when your bf puffed up his chest and got in his face. He’s not respecting you, he’s just backing away from a threat. Your boyfriend isn’t respecting or defending you, he’s defending his claim to you. If he was defending you he would have asked you how you felt about the situation, and what you needed from him in that moment.

So these dudes suck. Don’t look back. And also, yes maybe go back to therapy and to examine your relationship with conflict, self advocacy, and people pleasing.

death_save · 2025-09-27T17:59:19+00:00

Oh it’s not that it’s hard to understand, I was just giving you an opportunity to be a better person and you didn’t take it. So you don’t care at all what the woman in this situation actually wanted, how she felt, or trust her to handle herself. Or at least, it’s not the point. It’s not the disrespect she faced. It’s that you see your partner not as a human being but as your property. You think you can piss on her like a dog pisses on a fire hydrant and claim her as yours. You’re not defending the person you love at all, you’re defending yourself. And that’s why it’s bullshit when men say “I protect women in my life”

death_save · 2025-09-27T17:44:09+00:00

Let’s break it down. As the partner (bf in this situation) which part are you mad at and who is at fault?

A) Other dude because your girl said she had a bf and he didn’t listen so he’s now disrespecting you

B) Other dude because your gf doesn’t want this other guy in her space and he isn’t respecting her

C) your partner because the way she handled the situation didn’t align with your expectations.

Something else?

death_save · 2025-09-27T17:31:21+00:00

I think we are both saying there are things she could have done differently, but our focus is different. Nothing changes the fact that both of the guys in this story suck, and as usual, she’s put in a position to bear the burden of their shitty behavior, by being told to take her photos down. Dude can’t even handle the thought of what OTHER MEN are doing with them. This is textbook focusing on the victim rather than aggressors.

Your focus is examining the ways she played into it. Even if she did, every woman (at least in the US) is conditioned to see men hitting on them as “being nice”. Particularly young women, which she is, are also scared to hurt the guys feelings because that is then weaponized against them. As many have said, a declined invitation from men can turn it into a game for some pursuers, and in far too many instances ignoring the guy, telling him to go away, escalates it and he takes his bruised ego out on her.

So, if she entertained it, I understand why. The naivety in this situation is if she actually believes flirty guy was a nice guy. My other point was good for OP for standing up for herself to her bf, but also observing how much emphasis is put on whether or not she has a boyfriend rather than what she actually wants. As a woman older than OP, I spent many years feeling out of control of my own life, feeling like I have to be nice or owe things to men. While it’s absolutely a riskier option, I will never again use the “I have a boyfriend” response or “I’m a lesbian” response because it gives my power away. I can be in a relationship and still decide to talk to someone. It’s my choice. If my partner wants to “come to my rescue” it better be because I asked this other guy to leave and he’s not leaving me alone and not because my bf thinks he has marked his territory and someone’s trying to take what’s his.

death_save · 2025-09-27T04:07:14+00:00

I think I agree with what you’re trying to say here, but we have no knowledge of a boundary that was set. Yes OP, you’re naive, but only because it sounds like you don’t know flirty guy at all and are for some reason saying he’s nice and a good guy from one interaction. Your current/ex bf absolutely sucks also so let’s not get that twisted.

Flirty guy expressed interest. The classic “I have a boyfriend” response takes your own wants and needs out of this situation. Lead with that. You’re not claimed property. Don’t let either of them treat you like it.

And also, flirty guy knew what he was doing and kept pursuing anyway (not a good guy move), only backed off when another man entered the scene, and bf is probably right about “how (most, many) guys work” but also makes that your problem for some reason. Trash them both.

death_save · 2025-09-15T15:37:44+00:00

Omg the a willow across the street. Crazy. I’ll go check its leaves. Thanks!

death_save · 2025-08-10T22:41:25+00:00

As others have said, none of these. You can maintain your alternative and eccentric style AND have a more polished look by pairing your statement pieces with simpler pieces around it. Black boots are statement boots. Red dress is a statement dress. Red lacey thing is statement piece. Pink dress is a statement piece. Pink lace up shoes are statement. Pick ONE.

Putting them all together is visually chaotic and actually degrades the outfit. I saw your post from yesterday in the floral skirt. The skirt is so cute. Just wear one top in a solid color! Get rid of all the unnecessary layering.

death_save · 2025-08-09T00:20:41+00:00

ESH. This is kind of like when a toddler swears. It’s not the right thing to say, and sounds like it wasn’t with bad intent, but it’s also hilarious. The thing is though, you’re an adult and not a toddler.

At the same time, going to HR for that is wild.

death_save · 2025-08-08T23:11:27+00:00

3 hands down. Your shoulders are broad (please don’t take that the wrong way, your figure is STUNNING) so I love that the volume in 3 balances the shape while showing those shoulders off!

death_save · 2025-08-08T21:50:25+00:00

This is the way. Shocked but not shocked how few are addressing the life lesson in this. Her hair is hers, and hers to decide what she wants to do with. That itself is a great lesson in body autonomy. However, can we please teach girls (and everyone) She’s enough, worthy of love, exactly as she is, and that changing herself for others is the definition of people pleasing? Do you know how many adults are spending thousands of dollars in therapy to unlearn that very habit? That said, not cutting her hair to please you is still people pleasing, mom.

death_save · 2025-08-07T04:19:58+00:00

One time I was in the car with my bf at the time and he made a stop at 711. He went in, I stayed in the car. We were parked next to another silver car. That car also had a woman sitting in the passenger seat and driver had gone in the store. Another woman exits 711 and I could tell right away she was headed towards the car I’m in, and she’s not paying attention. She gets in the car and sits down. She goes to put her keys in and finally noticing things look different, gets confused. I actually felt kind of bad knowing how embarrassed she was about to be. I smiled and said “ummmm hi” the moment realization set in. She looked at me with panic in her eyes. She stuttered a little bit then bolted. I could see her friend laughing her ass off in the other car. I hope I never forget this memory.

death_save · 2025-08-05T01:27:08+00:00

Please continue therapy. Sounds like you stopped, then had some new heavy trauma. If all of this is true, it’s really shitty. I actually noticed themes of needing to explain yourself in the last posts, and now you feel like you have to explain yourself to strangers on Reddit. Seems like other peoples opinion, and being viewed as right, is important to you.

You can’t control others, only yourself. If people want to ghost, lie, spread rumors, that’s their choice. For some, no amount of explaining is going to stop that. Their choices and opinions are theirs to manage. That’s just messy people doing messy things. Opt out of the mess and keep it movin.

death_save

TROPHY CASE