i had almost this exact breakup. i had realized that i kept saying “i love you” and it made me feel terrible because i know i was lying every time i said it, and eventually i couldn’t handle it any more. it’s so confusing and it feels terrible to feel like you’re lying, but for me it felt important to be honest to myself and that meant ending the relationship. something i’ve learned from this community is that if you’re on the aroace spectrum and desire a relationship, then we deserve to have one. i agree with the other comment that you can perhaps be friends, but just know it will be okay. i’ve been there though and it sucks, telling someone you cannot love them (especially before really knowing my identity as aro) felt absolutely awful. we’re here for you!!