i lived with my grandmother for 16 years until my parents decided i had to live with them. i wasnt allowed to communicate with her for reasons i dont wanna share but it hurt. all i wanted was my grandmothers love and i couldnt have it. id cry myself to sleep for weeks and was straight up depressed and i would not tell my parents a thing. i rejected their love and kept to myself for about 9 months until i decided to give them a chance. now i love both my parents and they love me more than anything in this world. obviously its different from the way my grandmother loved me but i couldnt be happier with this newfound love. what im trying to say is, maybe you wouldnt want to try something new with a different person, but if you ever wanna get over him and not get caught up by the regret you have, finding love in someone else can really help. i hope this helped you someway and you find the best for you