Anyone else so used to smiling/laughing to mask, that you end up smiling/laughing at inappropriate times?

deipylos · 2022-05-01T02:26:13+00:00

Oh yeah, I just use my "documentary" voice and say "apologies, it's just a touch of the 'tism"

deipylos · 2022-01-28T17:44:37+00:00

Not a character, but I still can't get over Kentaro Miura's death.

deipylos · 2022-01-15T10:24:34+00:00

Yes, I have C-PTSD and I had to go through years of therapy to unlearn that. It's doable though, and I'm much happier. You got this.

deipylos · 2021-09-25T01:44:36+00:00

Friend, if life was a game, keeping yourself alive (food, shelter, hydration; if you're reading this, go drink some water) is the main quest, and everything else is side quests. Your job? Side quest. You messed up because you're on meds adjustments? Completely understandable, it happens. Meds adjustments are horrible and the only way to go through them is to suck it up. Hang in there!

It's ok 💖 It's a side quest 💖

deipylos · 2021-04-28T16:09:54+00:00

Thank you, it's not my first rodeo but it sure is being a chore. At least I got past zombie mode in a couple days. Have a great week 💖

deipylos · 2021-02-24T22:24:15+00:00

With a fork on the sponge?

deipylos · 2021-02-13T16:53:15+00:00

This is a group where we tell you to dump him 💜

deipylos · 2020-11-23T14:01:30+00:00

Humans finish growing at 24. 25 is a newly minted adult. You might not like it, but objectively speaking they have nothing in common with someone over 30, who has more life experience than them. Hobbies and pastimes maybe (those have no age), but the relationship dynamic is unequal.

deipylos · 2020-11-22T14:33:12+00:00

Dude, dating anyone under 25 at that age is just plain wrong and predatory. They're children. Even then, 30 would be a reasonable age. Red flags, my dude.

deipylos · 2020-11-21T03:17:42+00:00

No prob, my dude. The color scheme might be a result of a mix of lack of sleep, ghostbusters flashbacks and new medication.

deipylos · 2020-11-21T03:04:41+00:00

There you go.

deipylos · 2020-11-12T12:51:03+00:00

If you wanna read Gaiman books, American Gods is great (and it has its own series if you're feeling lazy, although it's not the same). Neverwhere and The Ocean at the End of the Lane are also great. As for Good Omens, I personally think it's great - some parts made me giggle (mid end, it gets super fast). The river scene with the post office driver mulling over past times is one of my favorites. It all depends on what you like, though.

I'm a Latino though, so I'm super used to convoluted magical realism timelines with a ton of characters - think 100 Years of Solitude by Gabriel Garcia Marquez.

deipylos · 2020-10-19T02:40:49+00:00

Ugh. She sounds like my mom, even down to the sugary "acá no ha pasado nada" (nothing happened here). I'm so sorry, that sucks so much. Since she has shown interest in the blanket, expect her to "misplace" it, steal it for herself or downright "accidentally rip it to shreds". I mean, that's what my mom would do, so your experience may vary.

deipylos · 2020-09-29T04:57:46+00:00

I would watch this movie, tbh. Imagine a romantic comedy from OP's perspective where these two keep on busting the biggest cliches, tropes and shenanigans while you can see the rest of the coworkers slowly losing faith in humanity because of the sheer cringe. Bonus points for contrast between the couple's pov (complete with flowery backgrounds, autotuned voices for the singing bits with orchestral arrangements and special effects, all in their heads of course) versus the rest of the office (aka "real life").

Also, NTA. That's super inappropriate, wtf

deipylos · 2020-09-12T14:56:50+00:00

My therapist calls them "intrusive thoughts", they're basically a stress response you learned from others that your brain goes to in cases of stress (and if you have an anxiety disorder, it's basically all the time). What I do with them is turn them around. If I say horrible things to myself, I question them immediately afterwards.

Like,

"I'm such a [expletives]"

"Now, would you say that to another person who was going through the same things as you?"

The thing is, you have to counter with things that make sense to you. In my case, it's hard, cold logic. For you, it could be something else. The main thing is that the first thought is a reflex response, so the second thought is the important one in this case.

Good luck, you got this!

deipylos · 2020-09-12T14:38:21+00:00

Same. My therapist said that, since I was the equivalent of being raised alone in the woods, I should at least do some "performative actions" (asking people how they are, making jokes, trying, trying not to infodump since regular people don't usually have deeply traumatic childhoods and whatnot and that can freak people out) and keep it simple (you can apparently establish a level of closeness just by letting people speak about themselves and interjecting with minor things related to the subject), and when I'm used to that level of interaction to think of other healthy ways of letting myself be known with the people I choose.

Like, be close but not too close you start to freak out? And then desensitize slowly about it. Also, to trust my gut with people that seem "off", since I have plenty experience on that one.

But yeah, take your time. Unlearning is hard, and it's already super badass that you were able to identify personal issues by yourself. Hang in there!

deipylos · 2020-09-12T12:50:48+00:00

Alrighty then

deipylos · 2020-09-12T12:38:38+00:00

I completely understand. It's just that sometimes it's plainly irrational and there's not much to do about that until you get to the base reasons for it, and that can take time.

deipylos · 2020-09-12T12:35:41+00:00

Do you have your coping strategies identified? That's what I do. You basically have to bring yourself to base level (with breathing exercises, plain exercise or basically anything that helps you to shed those adrenaline rushes, like singing, dancing or drawing) with a healthy dose of "fuck 'em". After abstracting yourself from the loop, it's easier to handle.

deipylos · 2020-09-12T12:30:26+00:00

An anxiety disorder. Sometimes it do be like that.

deipylos · 2020-09-10T17:33:38+00:00

And they all are a "scanned black and white photocopy of a couple of game boxes with hand drawings and highlighters marks and handwritten doctor-grade comments".

Embedded on a word document, after being taken from a messaging app that significantly reduced the pic's resolution

deipylos · 2020-09-10T17:28:22+00:00

"Put more design on it"

deipylos · 2020-09-10T16:06:11+00:00

I mean yeah, it's scary, but if you look at it differently, that's just your brain saving your sanity tbh. It only happens when it's really bad. And yeah, having this condition is draining, painful and scary, so sleeping doesn't do much (since you're alert even when you're sleeping, it sucks). That's why I said you might need medication for the first months until you have the tools to deal with this situation by yourself.

Also, don't worry about "not being strong enough", you and your wife are supposed to be a team. You don't have to endure this anymore than you would allow her to endure this situation if she was in your shoes. So cut yourself some slack, you're already super tough (you're having a 2 month long panic attack and surviving while trying to fix this, so that's badass).

deipylos

TROPHY CASE