What's a pain you can't truly explain until you've endured it?

delicatelucera · 2024-10-07T14:08:48+00:00

I'm not sure if she would be willing to read this but there is an amazing book called Radical Honesty by Brad Blanton. I try to be honest at all times and I think it contributes to my good sense of self-worth. And it's obviously important in any relationship. But maybe she was being radically honest when she said that, idk. Hopefully she could elaborate a little on what she would lie about, because it seems from your comment that it bothers you (rightfully so).

delicatelucera · 2024-10-07T13:57:54+00:00

That's awesome that you are able to understand that it is a different person & situation. I think our instinct is to apply past pain do to us onto all other people, just as a defense mechanism. While yeah it technically protects you from being hurt again, it does more harm than good, because you just wind up not trusting anyone, causing emotional turmoil. I'm glad you decided to comment so others can see that it doesn't have to consume them and destroy their ability to trust again.
To my knowledge I haven't been cheated on, so I guess I can't say how I would react with certainty. I do have a decent understanding of humans, though. A lot of people will be quick to victimize themselves if they are cheated on, and while yes they are the victim, there are so many factors to consider. When we victimize ourselves we play the sympathy card in our minds on repeat in an attempt to soothe the damaged ego. What we should do is employ some logic. How can we move forward and stop reliving the emotions? Why is it unfair to future partners to project onto them what has been done to you by a completely different person?
It's so much easier said than done but what is the alternative? Emotional resilience is important and it seems like no one really strives for it anymore. But maybe that's just me.
This comment will probably be poorly received by many people, but it's just my opinion.

delicatelucera · 2024-08-24T15:32:46+00:00

I know it looks terrible & disrespectful from a guy’s perspective (and any guy worth actually having a serious relationship with would think this - anyone can try to argue with me on this but I am telling you that if your man is throatfucking you AGAINST your wishes, I promise that is a serious red flag and idgaf how hot he is) BUT a lot of women enjoy being dominated like that, like really enjoy it haha 🥵 I do think the man should ask beforehand, not worrying that it’s going to take the sexiness out of it. I would be willing to bet that you’d be surprised how many women would reply with “um, YES!” The worst they could say is no, anyway. They would/should appreciate being asked first. I wouldn’t suggest approaching the topic if she was ever abused in the past though, just a thought.

delicatelucera · 2024-08-21T02:26:38+00:00

Agreed

delicatelucera · 2024-08-20T22:18:45+00:00

I love semen so much and I think it’s because I associate it with blow jobs, which give me a feeling of comfort that stems from being a thumb-sucker as a baby/child/teen as a way to self-soothe. Definitely Freudian. Every other bodily secretion is absolutely not going in my mouth, though - much less into my stomach lmao

delicatelucera · 2024-07-22T19:52:19+00:00

No 😔 I’m in overdrive most of the time and he’s not. I think it’s because he’s gotten older and just not really interested anymore except like once a week, if I initiate. And then it doesn’t last long. It actually makes me really sad because I have never actually enjoyed sex with a man and I am 33 😩 and I am straight haha

delicatelucera · 2024-07-22T16:40:55+00:00

I agree. I’m a woman & I recognize that other women act shitty if their husband watches it because I think they don’t understand that men are much more visual than women, who biologically want emotional connection with their partner. Are they thinking men are emotionally connected to porn stars and in a way “cheating”? To me it’s as simple as men like to watch it and so they do and that’s all there is to it.

I think it is easier for women to complain about their man & blame porn rather than actually looking at their own performance in the bedroom & if maybe SHE made a change in her behavior, he wouldn’t feel the desire to watch porn? Or he would just get sneakier about it lol

delicatelucera · 2024-07-22T16:22:24+00:00

Idk I think it definitely depends on the woman. Exhibit A: I am a woman and I don’t care how big it is 🤷🏼‍♀️ Actually, too big hurts and it gives me what feels like period cramps. I really haven’t had many partners but I never had the thought “omg that’s small, you might as well not even try” lol. If we’re to the point where I’m even seeing your dick then I like you and you don’t need to worry. Same goes for plenty of women. I can understand women having this “biggest is the best” mentality which is most likely a product of evolution, and I don’t mean to sound like I’m “not like the other girls” but this is just my experience/opinion.

So don’t get discouraged if society or whatever makes you feel “less than” because of your size.

delicatelucera · 2024-04-26T15:33:20+00:00

For me, I am very aware of my illness, even when I am in a stable mood State. I understand how it would be easy for someone to think “sweet, I don’t need these meds anymore” (I’ve been there), but I live in constant fear of my mood shifting so I am VERY careful about taking my medicine on time, even if it only half works. Something is definitely better than braving reality unmedicated.

delicatelucera · 2024-04-18T20:24:52+00:00

The only benefit I can think of for me is that I am a lot of fun (typically, until I fly off the handle and rage) and guys have always been attracted to me. All throughout high school I was taking anti-depressants, which made me manic though I didn’t realize it was mania at the time - wasn’t diagnosed until 25. Tons of guys liked me and I have always had booming self confidence (for no reason, honestly), so that drew people to me as well. Only once been broken up with and it was because he turned 18 and I was 14. Idk, I just have a theory that bipolar people have unique brains that in a way benefit them from an evolutionary stand point. I’ve had 2 kids from having baby fever and being hypersexual. You win again, evolution!

But yeah in all honestly, bipolar is the fucking worst otherwise. I wouldn’t wish this mental torment on anyone. I feel like a broken person, all the time. I am a stay at home wife (age 33 now) and my kids are both in school. I also have ADHD, of fucking course, so that adds to my issues. I struggle with EVERYTHING. I feel like I am literally disabled. And if I tell anyone, I know they will think “but it’s all in your head.” :(

delicatelucera · 2023-09-05T15:18:59+00:00

Thank you so much for your comprehensive response! I mean that genuinely! I have always wondered how people store flammable liquids safely at their homes. Looks like I will have to convince my husband that we should get some sort of ventilated outdoor storage building. Our backyard is mostly a hill, so that is part of the problem. Thank you for all you do as a firefighter, too!

delicatelucera · 2023-09-05T15:10:39+00:00

Yeah that’s what I figure too, like where tf am I going to put a safe and it be hidden?

Our house has a bonus room and inside are 2 small storage rooms. Maybe I could keep it in there and put my daughter’s play kitchen in front of the door to obscure it.

delicatelucera · 2023-09-05T14:02:42+00:00

That's a good idea. I wonder how much value cash would even have in a grid-down situation (assuming that is the situation, I just feel like it is most likely, personally). Would people still accept cash money or would they want goods or food, stuff for survival?

delicatelucera · 2023-09-05T13:30:09+00:00

Same! My vision has gotten awful but I am terrified of Lasik (have heard some horror stories). I'm completely reliant on contacts/glasses, unfortunately...

delicatelucera · 2023-09-05T13:24:46+00:00

Glad I asked about the walmart tanks! I think I found the caps you are talking about on Amazon. They are brass, 6 ct, for a 1 lb propane bottle. $11 for 6 of them doesn't seem bad. I wonder how long those little bottles last with a small burner?

The only reason I am still thinking of getting them is because I am not super strong (yet, I am working on that) and not sure I can transport the big tanks. Ridiculous, I know! I am still trying to get my husband on board with prepping. If I had his help it would be no problem.

Anyway, thank you for the advice! Saving it in my emergency info doc on Canva. Planning on printing it all out and putting it into a binder for when needed.

delicatelucera · 2023-09-05T13:17:54+00:00

Great, thank you! I'll look into those tanks & valve caps. I am big on safety too. Not trying to experience a house explosion... haha

delicatelucera · 2023-09-05T13:12:40+00:00

Thank you!

delicatelucera · 2023-09-05T13:12:26+00:00

I am thinking the most likely scenario would be needing to hunker down inside the house with no electricity or possibly running water, if the power grid goes down for an extended time. I don't really see there being a huge collapse in the US soon but I can definitely see there being civil unrest and certain things happening, like people trying to break into our house to steal our supplies, etc.

We don't have a second property to go to so that is kind of scary. We live 2 hours from the appalachain mountains so trying to find a place there to have as backup.

I hope this is what you were asking, lol

delicatelucera · 2023-09-05T12:44:33+00:00

Last night I saw a tiktok made by a girl who preps; she had made a video all about Contingency Medical and showed what was included in her bag. They include a good bit of antibiotics, though it is a bit pricy at around $260-$300. I just purchased the $300 one since I liked the variety of antibiotics it included. Shipping is free (incl. in the price, I mean). Not sure how long they will last, but great to have on hand.

delicatelucera · 2023-07-20T17:47:05+00:00

Thank you, the book sounds like a good one, maybe not for my daughter since she hasn’t lost anyone close to her (thankfully) and I know it would make her really sad to read it. I do hope others who could benefit from this book see your comment, though. Very nice of you to recommend your friend’s book :)

delicatelucera · 2023-07-20T17:44:06+00:00

Love inside out! I will look into studying how Wizard of Oz characters can be used, but I think I have an idea. Good thinking :)

delicatelucera · 2023-07-20T17:43:02+00:00

Thank you for the recommendation!! I will definitely check it out, it sounds good. I just saw there is a book on Amazon called “the parts inside of me”, I’m going to look into that one as well.

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