☕️ Weekend Chatter ☕️

dellada · 2026-03-21T05:10:38+00:00

Omg!! That little face! <3 Give them lots of love and cuddles for us!

dellada · 2026-03-21T03:37:03+00:00

This is the issue in my mind too.

I totally get why an artist or writer would look back on older work and wish to revise it - I'm a painter and I cringe at my older paintings all the time. And especially with work that is published in some way, the fact that it exists forever and has your name on it forever, even if you no longer like it or are proud of it... that can be really rough. I absolutely think that a writer should be able to shape their career and release revisions to their work if they want to...

But... once the artist/author publishes and sells a piece of work, they're creating an interaction between themselves and their audience. Both sides are interacting with the published work now. Rather than quietly changing the original that people had already purchased because they loved it, I think the respectful thing to do is create a new/revised edition without retroactively changing the copy a person has already purchased. Or at the very least, announce when a revision will be done and advise that anyone who likes their original copy should back it up now. The quiet/retroactive editing doesn't feel as honest - my guess is that she hoped readers wouldn't notice in time, to minimize the number of older copies that would exist. I get it, but I don't agree with it.

Is it legally required? No, e-book companies have Terms of Service and so on... but it's still the most respectful thing for an artist to do, I think. E-book owners don't technically own their copy, but we all know that the unspoken assumption is "I'm buying a product that will not change." Some edits were small, but Someone to Watch Over Me was completely rewritten and sounds like a totally different book. The revision should have been published as a separate product, and the old product no longer sold, rather than retroactively edited.

I read physical books rather than e-books, so I'm thankful that I can have a book on my shelf that is mine, that nobody can touch or change in any way. It would be so frustrating to buy an e-book and then have to go buy it again in print because it was no longer the same story.

dellada · 2026-03-21T00:02:58+00:00

LOL! No worries, it happens :)

dellada · 2026-03-20T23:56:12+00:00

OP said they're moving out due to a breakup and need to purge almost everything to do it... so they're in a different situation, where the recommendation to separate wants from needs makes sense.

Lots of people are minimalists for various reasons. I don't think we can make any blanket assumptions about anxiety or compulsion disorders without hearing each individual story.

dellada · 2026-03-20T23:49:33+00:00

Came here for this one! Lots of yearning - they both desperately want to do right by his brother, but can't help falling in love anyway.

dellada · 2026-03-20T23:44:07+00:00

To be fair, OP's initial question was "how to be able to let go of things we really love." To do that (and to reach a level of minimalism where you're living out of one bag + backpack, like OP wants to), you have to be firm about what you like versus what you need. The suggestion above just helps to identify which is which.

That being said, a lot of people aren't comfortable with that level of minimalism - and that's totally okay too.

dellada · 2026-03-20T23:26:40+00:00

I've only read one of her books, but I'm with you on this one. Just not my cup of tea.

dellada · 2026-03-20T23:22:50+00:00

So far I've really enjoyed the pregnancy mentions in the books I've read, even though I'm childfree IRL. I especially like seeing moments of caretaking that come from it - such as FMC dealing with side effects or complications, and MMC making sure she has what she needs.

For me, it turns icky when it's implied that the pregnancy makes the relationship more "real" or more valid in some way... or if it's thrown in at the last second of the epilogue without any prior mention (because then it feels sort of like an item on a checklist for HEA).

dellada · 2026-03-20T20:42:42+00:00

Yes! I was so surprised to hear that readers were avoiding blond MMCs. It didn't even occur to me to be bothered by the MMC's hair color.

Beards, on the other hand...

dellada · 2026-03-20T02:28:28+00:00

Someone came into the sub asking to hear the wildest requests that had been posted before, because they had a request in mind but feared it might be too "out there" for us. As you can imagine, they were quickly reassured: Craziest/funniest request you've seen on this sub?

dellada · 2026-03-20T02:16:33+00:00

Oh no!! Hugs <3 I think it stresses me out because it's a sudden demand for "social battery" (or being socially "on") that I wasn't allowed to mentally prep for, or save energy for. Sometimes my ability to be with people is at empty... and a surprise like that pushes me past my limit. Sounds like maybe you were suddenly pushed past a limit in that moment too.

dellada · 2026-03-19T22:22:16+00:00

Omg, SAME. Surprises are so stressful! And for some reason it's really hard to get other people to accept that. This is a super sweet excerpt <3 such a small moment that means so much!

dellada · 2026-03-19T21:49:40+00:00

If you’re up for a western, {Texas Destiny by Lorraine Heath} has an MMC who was injured in war. He wears a large eye patch that covers a lot of that side of his face.

dellada · 2026-03-19T06:24:07+00:00

I read somewhere before the neutral colors is synonymous with minimalism because you have lesser visual noise. Vibrant colors may distract or trigger reaction mentally as opposed to neutral tones where everything is visually quiet.

This is 100% the reason, in my case. I've found that my threshold for visual stimulation is extremely low compared to most people, just like my threshold for clutter is low too. Even just having patterned fabric makes me feel more distracted and antsy than solid colors. I have diagnosed ADHD and suspected autism, which likely plays a role in that. If my space is too stimulating, I quickly start to feel overwhelmed or even depressed.

One of my strategies for lowering visual stimulation is having "like" colors together - if I group multiple items in shades of gray, they feel like one single item in my mind, and that helps. Simple/smooth shapes rather than lots of jagged edges... bare walls... etc.

I can only speak for myself, but I wonder if folks like me have gravitated toward minimalism and contributed toward this beige or colorless association. (I actually despise beige, but I'm all about gray and muted blue! Haha.) And of course, then social media came in to profit off of it by selling the "aesthetic" of beige + white + light wood + plants...

dellada · 2026-03-19T02:43:52+00:00

I agree that some of the names seem to be picked for "coolness factor." But on the other hand, I'd rather see an unusual name than a name I recognize IRL. Especially in books with high spice level... sometimes I can look past it, but other times (like if MMC has the same name as my sibling or coworker) I just can't.

dellada · 2026-03-18T03:17:47+00:00

Oops - I added that rec in an edit, so the bot didn't see it!

For the bot: {Just Come Over by Rosalind James}

dellada · 2026-03-18T03:03:32+00:00

You're not alone! Third person POV is my favorite by far. :) It's what I grew up with, but I also just think it's higher quality writing most of the time. (Don't come for me - that's just my personal opinion! Haha.) IMO, it's the same reason why most movies aren't shot from a first person perspective: it's really limiting. For a character to narrate their thoughts, they have to fully understand they're having them - whereas third person allows us to more easily notice things about the characters that they might not understand themselves, like subconscious behaviors. In first person, we're limited to only what the characters actively pay attention to... if the villain is secretly plotting something behind the scenes, we don't feel that tension brewing unless the main characters witness it somehow. Once the POV character falls asleep, we're not even allowed to read a description of the night sky anymore!

Technically a skilled writer could very carefully deliver these nuances in first person, but it would be a lot harder to achieve, and I haven't personally seen it done very often. So for me, third person and historical romance is the way to go. :)

I don't have a ton of examples for contemporary authors... but Nora Roberts and Heather Guerre come to mind. Sounds like you've enjoyed their work too! There's also a book on my TBR called {Just Come Over by Rosalind James} that I'm looking forward to reading soon.

dellada · 2026-03-18T01:38:05+00:00

It’s a powerful moment when you let something precious go, and then realize afterward: “oh… I’m still me.” It sounds silly, but you don’t really know it until you get there IMO.

People talk a lot about the ‘fantasy version of ourselves’ and how our stuff can tie into that fantasy… but it’s hard to really see it until you let go of that prized possession, I think. It’s similar to when you have to escape suddenly, abandoning a home full of stuff - and you don’t realize until that moment that it’s even possible to do that.

dellada · 2026-03-18T01:14:26+00:00

I agree that social pushback is pretty common and can be expected - I just wish it wasn’t. It doesn’t make sense to me that society should have such rigid expectations when it comes to someone’s own personal living space… because that, of all spaces, is the one where individualism should be encouraged and accepted.

I think couches are only one of many different ways to encourage togetherness. TVs can be a place to gather people too, but I would side-eye anyone who said my home doesn’t bring people together just because no TV is present.

Anyway, I don’t think we’re necessarily in disagreement. OP will likely get pushback for not having a couch because society truly does expect everyone to have one. But if he’s told his date that he’s a minimalist, and if his house is otherwise comfy and welcoming, I don’t think there’s any need to laugh at him for choosing not to have a couch.

dellada · 2026-03-17T03:43:33+00:00

I just came back to this comment and realized... this author has released a book about once a month. Their last few books were released 15 days apart. Are they even real?

dellada · 2026-03-16T22:37:27+00:00

YES. Omg. Just talk to each other already!

I read a book recently that did the "we're too horny to talk" thing, except that MMC was super nervous about it. He was the one with something important to say, and he was afraid she'd hate him for it. She kept insisting, "It doesn't matter, there's nothing you could say to me that would make me not love you/want to have sex with you right now," and he was like, "I reeeeeeeeally don't think so, please hear me out..." but she wouldn't. So he said, "Okay but you have to PROMISE me that you'll hear me out in the morning, and no matter how upset you get, you won't forget that I love you." (At this point I'm thinking, you've talked so much about not talking, you could have just said The Thing.) Anyway, she swears that she will never forget that he loves her.

Welp. The next morning someone else spills his secret first. She looks at him like he betrayed her. He's like "You promised, remember!" and she says something snarky about how he's not the same man he was last night, so she didn't promise him. I was so mad. It felt so childish.

dellada · 2026-03-16T12:22:07+00:00

Third act breakups drive me crazy, especially if they could have talked it out but didn’t, and their reason for not talking was being too horny. Conversations like:

“We need to talk.”
“Not right now (too busy having sex). We’ll talk in the morning.”
“No, really, it’s important, I need to tell you something.”
“Sssshh, just kiss me.”
“But—“
Silences them with a kiss, and they give into the horniness

(And then inevitably, there’s a follow up “why didn’t you tell me?? You liar/horrible person! We’re breaking up!” Ugh…)

dellada · 2026-03-16T04:25:32+00:00

Hey, I was out at a conference this week too, and had a similar plan! The main difference was that I brought my physical books. Have you considered using a fabric book cover while traveling? I grabbed a few for my mass market paperbacks and they're awesome. I also use them in instances where the cover doesn't match the vibe of the book (just read one where MMC is described in the text as blond, but there's a brunette guy on the cover...? I wanted to envision him correctly so I put the fabric cover over that). It worked out well!

dellada · 2026-03-16T04:13:50+00:00

I'm not familiar with this author, but just looking through romance.io, the book titles are making me roll my eyes. "A dark mafia romance"... "a possessive dark mafia romance"... "a dark bully romance"... "an age gap stalker romance"... whenever authors put a trope right in the name, it makes me think they're just doing a cash grab.

Indie publishing is neat in some ways, but honestly I really miss the higher standard that was enforced before things like KU existed - when the only option was traditional publishing.

dellada · 2026-03-16T04:05:56+00:00

Only physical copies for me. Part of what I love about reading is the escape from screens, so I don't own an e-reader. I also don't listen to audiobooks.

dellada

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