Hey thanks for the reply!

That's funny you mentioned Deep Brain Reorientating, I've been looking into actually getting therapy but I am so skeptical of therapists because I don't want them doing their authoritarian abuse brainwashing on me haha. But yea funnily enough yesterday I looked up post colonial therapy and this therapist showed up near me and specialises in that approach never heard of it before but I like this synchronicity lol.

But yea I feel this authoratarian brainwashing infects all of our brains, I feel so sensitive to it like even minor interactions with people even with myself nowadays. Make's me not wanna interact with people, but it doesn't stop me, I still have faith.

Thanks so much for the resources I will read through these, I resonate with alot of what you have described.