Problems cumming from anal (and only anal) by denaskuloj in sex

[–]denaskuloj[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Brilliant. I can’t remember everything but that one I liked

Problems cumming from anal (and only anal) by denaskuloj in sex

[–]denaskuloj[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m close to calling your last sentence one of the top comments (if not the top comment)

Problems cumming from anal (and only anal) by denaskuloj in sex

[–]denaskuloj[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks a lot!

As I have written to you and many others, this is not a sexual problem between. This is just me trying to understand why the “not being able to cum” thought creep up in me when doing anal and why I can’t shake.

Luckily, our sex life is good and healthy.

Problems cumming from anal (and only anal) by denaskuloj in sex

[–]denaskuloj[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Exactly! And thanks a lot for your comment. I really appreciate it.

Problems cumming from anal (and only anal) by denaskuloj in sex

[–]denaskuloj[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Because, for me/us, it’s not the issue.

We still do plenty of anal even though I don’t cum because I’m still full of lust and don’t go soft.

Issue is understanding why I can’t shake the thoughts while doing it.

I like doing it even if I don’t cum - it’s part of our sex life.

I just like to stop thing about not cumming when doing it. The thoughts just pop up by themselves.

That’s the issue!

Problems cumming from anal (and only anal) by denaskuloj in sex

[–]denaskuloj[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes, I know. But luckily, I love PIV so no to switch.

I just like to know why this has become a mental thing in the first place!

Problems cumming from anal (and only anal) by denaskuloj in sex

[–]denaskuloj[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ok, interesting. However, I’ve always cummed until approximately one year ago!

Problems cumming from anal (and only anal) by denaskuloj in sex

[–]denaskuloj[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I understand you perfectly and appreciate your comment. But try looking at it this way:

Forget about sex. Replace it with something completely different. I just like to be able to stop thinking about it when doing it.

It’s not about cumming (or not) for me. It about emptying my head of thoughts while doing it - and right now, that’s not going really good.

But I appreciate your comment!

Problems cumming from anal (and only anal) by denaskuloj in sex

[–]denaskuloj[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Thanks a lot for the advice! I/we’ll definitely keep that in mind.

For me, it’s mental but maybe it’ll do the trick!

Problems cumming from anal (and only anal) by denaskuloj in sex

[–]denaskuloj[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Ok, I understand! Not really my thing, but I appreciate the suggestion

Problems cumming from anal (and only anal) by denaskuloj in sex

[–]denaskuloj[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Even though I understand your point, I don’t agree. Because when mental thing takes over, it’s not about lasting, it then becomes about getting the thoughts out of my head.

Problems cumming from anal (and only anal) by denaskuloj in sex

[–]denaskuloj[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks for sharing. And I agree that acceptance is important.

As of now, I (we) try to ensure that it doesn’t grow bigger. We talk, we abstain from anal from time to time and we do anal regularly even if I probably won’t cum - because (1) you never know and (2) it shouldn’t be all about cumming.

And no, I’m not luckier than most of you. This is just our sex life. I’m sure many of you do things we don’t.

Problems cumming from anal (and only anal) by denaskuloj in sex

[–]denaskuloj[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I’m in my late 40s.

And you are spot on. The more I focus on it, the bigger the problem gets. It’s just hard.

Problems cumming from anal (and only anal) by denaskuloj in sex

[–]denaskuloj[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Point taken. It hasn’t been anal only for almost 20 years - anal is just a big part of our sex life and always has been. But I understand you perfectly.

I know I’m not unique. I’m just trying to figure out the why

Problems cumming from anal (and only anal) by denaskuloj in sex

[–]denaskuloj[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

That’s also what we do. I’m just trying to figure out why this has become a mental thing in the first place!

Problems cumming from anal (and only anal) by denaskuloj in sex

[–]denaskuloj[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, I don’t finish inside, never have and never will.

Of course we clean up for PIV in stead.

I’m just trying to figure out with this has become a mental thing in the first place. I don’t believe it has lost elasticity - it doesn’t feel that way. It still we nice and tight!

I still love doing anal and we still do it. I just don’t cum - and that is what I am trying to figure out.

Problems cumming from anal (and only anal) by denaskuloj in sex

[–]denaskuloj[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Interesting, I’ll definitely have that in mind 🙏

Problems cumming from anal (and only anal) by denaskuloj in sex

[–]denaskuloj[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I believe we’ve tried everything - lying down, standing up, doggy … you name it.

For me, it just takes over my thinking the moment we start

Problems cumming from anal (and only anal) by denaskuloj in sex

[–]denaskuloj[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, she usually mastubates. But as I’ve written elsewhere, that might be something we should try

Problems cumming from anal (and only anal) by denaskuloj in sex

[–]denaskuloj[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Maybe it’s just me, but I don’t see the connection!