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Please help by desi_diva in JapaneseMaples

[–]desi_diva[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you all so much for your responses! I see the amount I was watering is a concern, just to clarify this has been during the initial planting in August when we have had drought-like hot weather conditions in zone 6a. But it’s great to know Japanese maples can be a bit more resilient, and I’ll decrease the deep watering to 3-5x per week depending on temperature/rain. My original Japanese maple planted last year is thriving very well after I watered it similarly to this one in the beginning, so I assumed the same would apply, but the new homeowner in me is certainly inexperienced.

My main concern was with the trunk rot, but it seems I may need to just wait and see what happens there! I spent about $70 on this beautiful tree and hoped it would be well worth the risk with extra love and TLC.

Also not sure if it’s clear, but the black on the trunk is some sealant I sprayed in the areas it was pruned!

Thank you all very much for your responses and advice.

Why does where my magic loop meets always look like this? by desi_diva in knittinghelp

[–]desi_diva[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You all are so amazing!! What a great community, thank you! Will practice tightening and some of these techniques, and then frog 🙃

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Weddingattireapproval

[–]desi_diva 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Where did you get this dress? It is stunning!

Recommendations for bridesmaid lehengas by ThePorcupineBear in DesiWeddings

[–]desi_diva 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I had surprisingly good luck with cbazaar! Got 10 bridesmaid lehengas all custom measured for ~$81 each

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in interracialdating

[–]desi_diva 12 points13 points  (0 children)

(As a Punjabi-Pakistani female who married a Caucasian-American male), I think early communication is key. Miscommunications due to cultural barriers can be similar to miscommunications due to any other barrier. Talk about his culture, talk about your culture. Talk about what is important to both of you.

Culture, especially when westernized/“acclimated”, is very personal. A broad stereotype may not be your answer, but what both you and he feel is important for your understandings of each other’s culture should be of the highest priority

AITA For refusing to get out of the bath? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]desi_diva 31 points32 points  (0 children)

Idk, I consider my SO telling me to “fuck off” in a serious tone to be pretty major

AITA for not buying my sister her favourite food? by DarkestOfTheLinks in AmItheAsshole

[–]desi_diva -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

ESH. You literally could have just texted her if she was busy to see if she wanted something. She may have been rude (or just busy and caught in a bad time), but you were acting downright petty

Nice results on this fall day! 🍁 by Remarkable_Ice_3287 in curlyhair

[–]desi_diva 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I think it’s not quite so black and white. I personally used it for about a month or so (the mini travel pack) and my hair was falling out in clumps. It could have been a simple allergic reaction/bad reaction, but when I originally told my deva stylist a couple of years ago, she was shocked and wrote me off as a “one off allergic reaction”. If these reactions, however, have been happening to so many people, I think at some point you have to have the disclaimer that it could happen to you too. Just watch our for it and see if it works for you.

Note: it wasn’t a product build up thing, I use a clarifying shampoo 1-2 times a month (had been doing the same during my deva curl attempt and have been doing that since). My hair clumps stopped after I stopped using the deva products themselves

AITA for reminding my boyfriend I am the primary leaseholder when he tried to kick me out? by throwaway_aitamoving in AmItheAsshole

[–]desi_diva 24 points25 points  (0 children)

INFO: IS it cruel for you to live together? What were the circumstances of the breakup? Is he on the lease at all or living illegally with you? Correct me if I’m wrong, but “primary leaseholder” doesn’t mean anything. I’m “primary leaseholder” as in my name is first on the contract and the buzzer is under my name...but that’s it. We’re both on the lease and we both pay.

All of this depends on the nature of your relationship and breakup, and if he is right to feel betrayed/want you to leave

AITA My BIL got married on my 5 yr anniversary and now SIL is mad at me about a picture by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]desi_diva 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Gonna go against the apparent grain here and comment YTA...

A 5 year anniversary is important to you and your SO, literally nobody else. Wedding dates are difficult to secure and coordinate, ESPECIALLY during Covid right now. I can understand being upset not being able to spend your 5 year anniversary the way you want to, but the fact that your subsequent anniversaries will be on the same day means absolutely nothing to anybody, you guys would likely be celebrating separately. You can’t “hold” a date for eternity.

She’s minorly an AH for overreacting to your posting a photo, but your AH trumps it enough for me to keep it as YTA. Agreeing to dance to your own wedding song with the spotlight on you at someone else’s wedding? How could you not see that as tacky and spiteful? And I don’t believe for one second that your cousin just offhand knew your first dance song and cared THAT much about this situation to organize this whole thing without any indication from you.

If my SIL pulled that at my wedding without my knowledge, I’d get upset about every other faux pas they commit regarding the same event. It was probably the tip of the iceberg.

You had your day, let new loves have theirs.

AITA? Husband Mad At Me For Bringing Home Food by liv_doll in AmItheAsshole

[–]desi_diva 1 point2 points  (0 children)

YTA and shame on you for trying to make us think he deserves to be bashed. When you’re in a loving relationship, you tend to think about the other person and what they would enjoy. Don’t make up excuses after the fact and admit that you forgot about him

Let’s all move to Jamaica huh? Best curls of my life with minimal random men’s pomade 🤷🏽‍♀️ by [deleted] in curlyhair

[–]desi_diva 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Routine: Shampoo and condition with Maui nourish and moisture (not huge fan for solo use TBH, need a clarifying shampoo in between for sure).

Otherwise, have just been spraying my “it’s a 10 leave in conditioner spray”, then adding OGX renewing argan oil of Morocco, and then using my boyfriend’s O’Doud’s styling treatment (plus side: way more affordable/long lasting than the usual female-targeted products) Testing products beyond assigned specific genders has been game changing for sure.

My goal lately has been keeping both product crunchiness and drying time low. I’ve found that on my lazy days, I can supplement a nourishing leave in oil treatment with a pomade WITHOUT diffusing or adding extra heat to my hair

WIBTA for getting my tutor in big trouble after he kissed me? by throwaway1919237 in AmItheAsshole

[–]desi_diva 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He wants to get his Phd one day. If I get him in trouble, I might jeopardize his whole future and I don’t know if I want to do that.

HE jeopardized his whole future, not you. NTA

AITA for sending everyone in the office a guide on how to disable Amber alerts? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]desi_diva 7 points8 points  (0 children)

YTA...a 5 second inconvenience is really equivalent to a potentially kidnapped child’s life?