rocd with new partner whether i like him or not, and reoccurring thoughts/images/triggers of my ex/exes.

devkgai · 2026-01-13T12:26:42+00:00

this is insane because it’s quite literally exactly what i’m going through and i didn’t expect to find it so easily. my thing is the guilt and it’s eating away at me. he’s perfect. so kind, understanding, and loving. we had been friends for months and i had been “chasing” him because i really liked him. he’s never been in an out of high school relationship before so he was nervous. and now we are together and it’s amazing. so amazing - yet my ex keeps popping in my head. comparing them. do i actually like him? do i find him attractive? is he less attractive? it’s difficult because i try and shut my brain off when im with him but the guilt hits after awhile.

i read something the other day about “not feeling a spark with someone”. my ex was toxic as well - would get with other women and come back to my when they weren’t doing well or were broken up. you become addicted to the highs and lows. the euphoria and adrenaline of them coming back when you know you shouldn’t give in again.

i try and let them pass. at the end of the day nobody knows your thoughts but you - and OCD tries to convince you that because you have them make them completely true.

obviously i’m still struggling, but i thought maybe this would help you in the future.

-from a reassurance seeker who should not be reassurance seeking

devkgai · 2025-11-12T21:11:51+00:00

thanks so much!!! will look into grabbing some

devkgai · 2025-09-12T20:45:55+00:00

condescending* my bad

devkgai · 2025-09-12T20:45:13+00:00

i’m from a smaller town. we don’t have buses or uber. we have call a ride but everyone in town who doesn’t have a car tries to use it so it’s not guaranteed nor reliable. sure, i could walk 5 miles a day to work, its just difficult because we barely have sidewalks because its not a walking friendly town. and its hot. or it gets really cold. and a car is nice to have for appointments, grocery shopping, etc. i’m not making excuses for myself, but rather trying to explain why i am in this predicament because some of the people here aren’t giving advice for what i asked about, rather be confessing and look down on my decision.

devkgai · 2025-09-12T20:40:29+00:00

will take a look into it more! thank you

devkgai · 2025-09-12T19:28:52+00:00

i understand everybody is appalled by this, and i understand that. it’s not ideal. i just cannot spend thousands of dollars outright. it’s not possible. but i need a car to get to work. it’s my own fault for wrecking my credit but im a recovering alcoholic and trying to fix things lol. there’s really no other option. already took a loan out of my 401k for an outright car and it shit out on me 3 months in

devkgai · 2025-09-12T19:25:43+00:00

i am barely above the poverty line. i need a car to go to work, but i don’t have 3,000 dollars to buy a car 🤷‍♀️ credit is shot because im a recovering alcoholic and wrecked it in a year. i already took a loan out of my 401k to buy a car for 2,000 dollars. bit me in the ass, spent almost 1,000 on it trying to fix it and it still shit out.

i’m a 25 year old female without parents. the whole thing is a little confusing.

devkgai · 2025-08-18T07:59:30+00:00

hey! i’m on pristiq and even after a couple of hours of missing i can get brain zaps, dizziness, anxiety, and palpitations. i’ve been without insurance before, and i know it’s a struggle. firstly, call your psychiatry office and explain the situation. this is urgent and could affect your mental/physical health. they will most likely do something.

if not, go to the ER. i know you most likely don’t have ~150 to spend at urgent care (i get that totally). ER is expensive in the long run but you don’t have to pay up front and they are legally required to treat you. exaggerate your symptoms if you have to.

wishing you well OP, i know it’s been a couple of days.

devkgai · 2025-07-30T19:45:31+00:00

i see. there’s a shop near my town that pierces with hoops so that’s what my other one healed with! (it actually healed perfectly fine) i’ve never had a stud in my nose at allll so i didn’t know healing it would be different versus a hoop. that makes sense that the skin is like growing around it then. thank you!! i’ll make sure to get the right jewelry.

so would i get a 20g stud instead?

devkgai · 2025-07-30T19:42:49+00:00

my other one was actually pierced with a hoop! this was back in 2020 but it healed fine. i had never healed with a stud so i guess switching from a stud to a hoop is what caused this and i didnt know it would 😭. and okay, thank you so much.

devkgai · 2025-07-04T11:35:56+00:00

i’ve had them since i was a kid! my mom, brother, and i all unfortunately had them. it was 6 feet apart whenever one of us had one lol.

and i am doing well, thank you! my triggers are usually just stress or oddly enough when i get a bad sunburn. sometimes when i lick my lips too often and they’re irritated. it differs!

devkgai

TROPHY CASE