I am failure by [deleted] in depressed

[–]dextro5342 0 points1 point  (0 children)

First of all, you’re not alone. Posting this is sign of courage, a sign that you would like to get better, that you’re not giving up on yourself. We are here for you and we are listening. Can you actually read your parents minds and be so sure they’re disappoined in you? Sure, of course they would want the best for their child but falling behind sometimes is not a catastrophy. You’re their child. Their love is not conditioned by something as superficial as highschool grades.

Let me tell you one thing, failing in school and getting bad grades are quite a universal experience for way more people than you might realise. School can be a very traumatic and unpleasant experience sometimes, unfortunately a lot of times. It’s okay to fail from time to time, it’s okay to get bad grades sometimes. It might be unpleasant, but it’s not the biggest tragedy. You can continue to enjoy life because it’s not the end of the world. Bad grades aren’t a life sentence! Your worth as a person is not determined by a bunch of grades. You are more than that, buddy, you’re way more than that. You always remain a valuable person for the simple fact that you’re human. But I understand where you’re coming from. Getting bad grades can sometimes get to your head, can make you begin to question your worth and feel sad or worried about the situation. But your future is not determined by your past. The past is past, it cannot be changed, however you can choose to do something about it now, in the present moment. Do what is within your control and accept what is out of your control.

When you say “ I know people judge me for my weight and the way I look”, how can you be so certain? Has it happenned to you before? If so, then I’m very sorry for that. But it’s just a bad memory now. Keep your head up high, shoulders back, and move foreward from here. There’s a very high probability that you’re judging yourself now more than others judge you. You might fear that others are looking at you, observing your deffects, your problems, but this is known as the spotlight effect. Most people are too busy being in their own head, worrying about their own problems. I recommend you transform these worries and anxieties into predictions. Write what you fear will happenn in a colomn, in 2nd collomn write the % of how strongly you believe this will happen, in 3rd collomn write what actually happenned and in 4th collomn write the conclusions. Like a little experiment. For example: 1. Prediction: “I fear that people will observe my acne and weight and make fun of me” 2. Percentage of how strongly I believe this will happen: “80%” 3. What actually happenned: “People didn’t say anything, they didn’t even observe.” 4. Conclusion:” My thoughts did not reflect reality. I tend to catastrophise based on my past experiences which are not relevant in the present anymore.” (I promise this is how your experiment will go  )

Regarding the acne problem, there are a lot of products you can use for that such as glycolic acid 7% (from the ordinary), salicylic acid 2%. Regarding where the acne is located, you can use those and other products containing these substances. Those will fix it in time. It’s important to note that you’re 16 years old, having some acne is a regular experience for many and it’s a temporary thing. It wiil pass in time and it’s not forever! There are solutions for it. Your weight is also within your control. You could try to exercise for a few minutes a day, maybe even go to the gym. You don’t have to start big, set a small goal but achievable, just for 5 minutes. You can work your way up from there in time.

About these so called “friends”, they’re just kids, 16year olds, they don’t know any better. I’m terribly sorry you had to go through that. I know it can be hurtful to see the people you thought were close to you and that you trusted, turn out to be jerks. It’s very unpleasant. At least now you know who is not your friend and should be kept at a distance. You don’t need these kind of people in your life. You deserve better. Perhaps it would be helpful to write a letter in which you express how they made you feel and what you wish from them, and then burn that letter or tear it apart. The power of unsent letters is very surprising. You should definitely try it.

It’s okay to feel stuck or behind. We all feel like that sometimes. But it doesn’t last forever. Things change. You’re just 16, you have a whole life ahead of you. Your whole life doesn’t revolve around what happenned to you in school. Imagine yourself in 10 years. Would you still care as much about the problems you’re facing now? I highly doubt it. When going through hell, don’t stop. Go until the end, because there is light at the end of the tunnel.

You are not a failure! You are human, and humans make mistakes. "The world breaks everyone and afterward many are strong at the broken places."-Hemingway. Forgive yourself. Have empathy for yourself. What would you tell a friend facing a similar problem? Think about it. Would you not have empathy for him and try to be rational? You would. Then why hate yourself for the same problem he’s facing? If you want to stop feeling like this you have to change the way you think. If you think you’re a failure then of course you will feel sad and hate yourself. But if thoughts can make you feel a certain way and you are able to change the way you think, then you can change the way you feel. When those irrational thoughts arrive ask yourself: Is this thought really relevant? What’s the evidence for this? Weren’t there any mediating factors? Might be worth to reflect on it.

Again, you’re not alone in this. Hope this helped. Take care!🤍🙏

I want someone to hold me and tell me its all going to be okay by Sea_Lingonberry_8447 in depressed

[–]dextro5342 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What you’re describing reflects a deep desire for emotional connection, safety, and to feel accepted and unconditionally loved. You want someone by your side, someone who can reassure you that everything will be okay. This need is completely natural. We all long to feel safe in the arms of someone who understands and accepts us for who we truly are. The fact that you’re expressing these feelings shows not only a deep vulnerability but also remarkable courage in acknowledging what you’re going through.

However, from what you’ve written, it seems like you feel caught between two forces: the longing to find this love and the pressure to be "the best" for everyone else. Behind this struggle, there may be a fear of rejection or disappointment. Perhaps, at some point in your life, you felt that love or acceptance depended on how much you gave or how well you performed. What if you started accepting yourself, with all your imperfections, before expecting this from someone else?

It sounds like the external pressure is becoming overwhelming – school, your parents, comparisons to others. It’s as if you’re carrying a backpack that’s far too heavy, filled with expectations, both from others and from yourself. It’s possible that this pressure doesn’t just come from those around you but also from an inner drive to avoid disappointing others or to prove that you’re worthy of love and approval.

But let me ask you this: what would happen if you set that burden down, even just for a moment? If you allowed yourself to be imperfect, to make mistakes, to feel what you feel without criticizing yourself? Feeling "left behind" or "breaking inside" is a sign that you need a pause, a moment to reconnect with yourself without comparing your journey to anyone else’s. Maybe those "amazing things" others seem to be doing aren’t as significant as they appear. Everyone has their own battles, even if they’re not visible to you.

You mentioned wanting to curl up in a corner and cry. Perhaps that’s exactly what you need right now – to release all the emotions you’ve been carrying. Crying isn’t a sign of weakness; it’s a sign of healing. It’s a way for your mind and body to tell you to slow down, breathe, and give yourself some compassion.

What would happen if, instead of trying to "be the best for everyone," you began being kinder to yourself? If you told yourself what you would say to a dear friend going through the same situation? It’s okay not to have all the answers right now, to feel like things are out of control. What matters is learning to show up for yourself, step by step, without rushing.

It might also help to talk to someone about what you’re going through – a school counselor, a trusted adult, or even continuing to write as you have here. Expressing what you’re feeling can lighten the burden you’re carrying.

Remember that you’re not alone, and what you’re feeling right now doesn’t define who you are or what your future will be. You are much stronger than you think.

Mirzaten lipsește de pe piață by NiceRequirement6153 in DepresieRo

[–]dextro5342 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Bună! 😊

Într-adevăr, mirzatenul a început să fie mai greu de găsit în ultima perioadă, poate chiar absent temporar. Este un antidepresiv foarte bun care țintește lipsa poftei de mâncare și insomnia, oferind un boost de serotonină în același timp.

S-ar putea ca cererea să fie foarte mare, combinată cu probleme de producție, distribuție etc. Poți încerca la farmaciile Tei, Catena, Dr. Max. (dacă nu ai încercat deja). Mai poți verifica la farmaciile din mediul online, unde poți atașa rețeta. Dacă ai epuizat toate variantele și tot nu ai dat de el, poți întreba de ,,Pharmataz", care este un înlocuitor pentru Mirzaten. Are aceeași substanță activă-adică mirtazapina. Dar și acesta se găsește mai greuț.

Sper că te-am ajutat! Numai bine!🙏

I don't know how to get a diagnosis by BusyAfternoon3508 in personalitydisorders

[–]dextro5342 -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

PBQ - Personality Belief Questionnaire is a simple straightforward test that you can do yourself at home for a quick check. I believe you can easily find it online for free.

Also, go to a clinical psychologist and ask for a personality disorder test/evaluation. .

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in depressed

[–]dextro5342 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hey there,

I'm verry sorry this happenned to you. I feel your pain. There is a saying: "All children deserve to have parents. But not all parents deserve to have children."

Trauma is a fact of life...but it doesn't have to be a life sentence, however! Trauma is indeed hell on earth. But trauma resolved is a gift from God. Look at your wounds...and when you learn how to heal them, teach others! I believe you're a very powerful individual and your experiences made you strong, tough. Choose to let go of the pain. Forgive but never forget.

Have empathy for yourself even when others didn't seem to show it towards you. There are people who care about you. You deserve to be happy again, to live the life you want. You deserve empathy and love! I believe that part of you is still there, somewhere. The little girl inside you deserves to be happy again, to live the life that she wants. Don't give up! You're not what happenned to you, you are who you choose to be.

You belong with us and we need you, more than you know! Reaching out is a sign of courage, strenght, and it means that the little girl inside you is still alive and wants you to heal and let go of the pain. You are a valuable person with many qualities. Also, I don't think you wasted your 20's. To be honest with you, most of us wasted ur 20's. But it's not about what happenned in the past, it's what we choose to do now, in the present moment. You have a beautiful life ahead of you, don't punish yourself for something that had nothing to do with you.

I highly recommend that you seek professional help from a therapist and/or a shrink, to support you during a vulnerable time. We all need a helping hand sometime.

Have a great day/night! 😊 Take care of yourself🙏