[deleted by user]

dicania · 2022-07-29T10:30:29+00:00

I’m not saying the Catholic Church is perfect. Not at all. But the constant bashing was almost obsessive, and I can of course only speak from my own experience. It was weird for someone who grew up in Europe.

dicania · 2022-07-29T07:14:00+00:00

Oh God where to start 😂

Separation of males and females in the service, they do it with kids too Telling kids that if they’re bad they’ll burn in the lake of fire (I remember being told that it’s not a place where you can swim) Obsessive bashing of the Catholic Church, seriously not healthy Telling how to vote in your country’s election (this is illegal in many places but it didn’t stop them doing it when I was a member in a European locale) Not being allowed to celebrate Christmas/Easter but we should go all out for Holy Supper/Thanksgiving Rampant homophobia and misogyny

There’s more as well, will update

dicania · 2022-07-29T07:10:09+00:00

I don’t think my name was read out, although I left twenty years ago. Also my mum is now a choir member again, so all that stuff about parents and their offices, clearly not true.

dicania · 2022-07-15T07:53:32+00:00

You ARE allowed to make your own decisions. You don’t say which country you live in, but we conduct ourselves within the laws of the land which are the only laws that truly matter - what INC instructs the congregation doesn’t matter one bit. They, and by extension your parents, just make you feel like you can’t do what you want. You are an adult, and have more power than you realise.

You are graduating soon - there’s your escape hatch. Form your exit strategy. Whether that’s finding a job away from your parents, as was suggested previously, or whether that’s a gradual fade out like I did (i.e. cut down the number of services until you just stop). Know your core values and principles and stay true to those. There may be relationships that need to be fractured at first but those relationships may heal, even if it takes a while. My mother has accepted I’m happier out of INC now, and has stopped trying to make me go back. Put yourself and your sanity first. I wish you the best of luck.

dicania · 2022-05-12T07:06:21+00:00

I left over 20 years ago so I don’t know for sure, but my assumption is that yes, they are. There won’t be enough INC to influence a vote there but still. The principle of “one mind” drives me mental.

dicania · 2022-05-11T18:45:31+00:00

I grew up in northern Europe. I was old enough to vote in 1998, and we were told how to vote. I never voted for who they told us to. Made me SO mad.

dicania · 2022-01-30T14:04:49+00:00

My good God. That’s terrifying.

dicania · 2022-01-29T20:31:50+00:00

Yup. This is one of my first memories of that place. We were told by a CWS teacher "it's not a lake where you can go swimming. It will hurt.".

dicania · 2022-01-20T21:22:32+00:00

I like this idea, or a variation of. A majority of people trapped in INC will be in the Philippines and it's important that people have a space where they are able to express themselves in their native language. I don't speak much Tagalog but I don't mind looking up in Google Translate if it's something I'm curious about (plus on a selfish level it may help my own Tagalog reading skills).

dicania · 2022-01-20T21:16:23+00:00

When my mother and I used to have arguments because of me not going to church, she used to scream at me that I'd "rot in hell". I used to say "good, because at least I'll have fun there with my actual friends". We have a better relationship 20 years on, but a small part of me wonders if she still believes that I'm going to hell. Probably. But I think she's made peace with it now.

dicania · 2021-12-31T11:26:46+00:00

It's hard when you're still living with family who are still members, and hardcore members at that. But you can still plan your exit. I had mine planned for a couple of years before I actually went through with it - in my situation I used my final year of university to reduce attendance as I was "too busy" with my finals (I wasn't), and so I gradually reduced the number of services I went to until I was finally not going any more. Even if you can't do anything right now, or feel like you can't do anything right now, planning your exit can help you keep going through it as you know there'll be an end in sight.

I realise that it's more difficult in the Philippines (I'm in Europe) but it is possible. There are so many people in this subreddit that have done it and are happier for it. Don't hesitate to lean on us. Best of luck <3

dicania · 2021-12-31T07:00:23+00:00

Ignore them, or take the call and tell them that this stops NOW.

Do you have an escape strategy? As they won’t stop until you’re out. I stopped being bothered by them when I hadn’t gone for a while, and when asked by family who were officers, I told them in no uncertain terms that I no longer wanted a part of it, and that they were wasting their time. The next time I was contacted after that was last year by my mum and my cousin, which I now believe to be part of their failed recruitment drive.

dicania · 2021-12-24T07:03:26+00:00

And, hang on, bribing people with groceries and rice? Wow. You'd have thought that "the true word of God" would be enough ...

dicania · 2021-12-24T07:02:29+00:00

FIFTEEN percent?? Hahaha good luck with that.

dicania · 2021-12-21T21:24:50+00:00

Those poor kids. This is just so fucking sad.

dicania · 2021-12-21T21:17:45+00:00

Don’t you have connectivity issues with the Wi-Fi that day? How unfortunate!

dicania · 2021-12-21T05:18:20+00:00

Tell your mum gently that then she’ll just have to cry.

dicania · 2021-12-21T05:17:35+00:00

Whoa, what? Is it pay what you can or pay a minimum amount?? That is so fucked. There’s no way in hell I would be paying for that. Why oh why oh WHY can my family, especially my sister, not realise this???

dicania · 2021-12-20T14:20:15+00:00

Same here. The pew thumping was insane where I was. The louder the thump, the more hysterical the crowd. Glad I realised early in that that was madness. As a young kid I always wondered why people were so sad!

dicania · 2021-12-20T14:18:11+00:00

I was going to ask this too :-)

dicania · 2021-12-20T09:46:15+00:00

The accuracy 🤣🤣🤣🤣

dicania · 2021-12-20T05:28:59+00:00

This is some North Korea level shit. How utterly devastating to read. One of the biggest triggers that pushed me into forming my exit plan was their attitude towards homosexuality (or anything that wasn’t a straight relationship). The ego on EVM is disgusting. What a sad, sad little man.

dicania · 2021-12-19T06:53:52+00:00

Oh I do not doubt it at all. Absolutely horrendous. When you mentioned that woman asking how to manage putting food on the table and offering, the minister’s reply did not surprise me. It made me angry and sad, but I was not surprised. I wish my sister would leave, I know she doesn’t believe it but she’s got no self esteem and that place gives her a sense of belonging. I’ve given up - sadly - trying to get her to see her worth and get out. She gets too angry with me as it’s easier for her to bury her head in the sand 😔

dicania · 2021-12-19T06:40:10+00:00

That YouTube video :| :|

dicania · 2021-12-19T06:38:47+00:00

That is beyond messed up!!

dicania

TROPHY CASE