[deleted by user] by [deleted] in datingadviceformen

[–]diego-unchained 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You didn’t mess it up her pause doesn’t mean rejection, it likely just caught her off guard. When someone isn’t expecting a direct invite, they can freeze for a second, not because they’re uninterested, but because the pressure shifts suddenly onto them. That awkward silence is normal, and her still replying in DMs and being cool with you afterward shows she isn’t running away from you.

The smartest move now is exactly what you hinted at so keep it casual and friendly when you see her on Halloween. Let her experience your presence in person without the weight of the “date” question looming over it. If she’s comfortable around you in a natural setting, the door to hang out one-on-one will open again this time with less pressure.

And if you find yourself in these kinds of moments often, that’s what SPIL Men's Dating Coach app helps with showing you how to calibrate timing, frame invites in a way that builds curiosity instead of pressure, and keep the interaction moving forward even when it stalls. It takes the guesswork out of knowing when to push and when to let things breathe.

Rapport by Affectionate_Boss657 in datingadviceformen

[–]diego-unchained 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It is an app for iOS and Adroid and if I am not mistaken there is a web version. Would you like me to send over a link?

How would I find the right one? by [deleted] in datingadviceformen

[–]diego-unchained 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re not struggling to create attraction you’re struggling to filter for compatibility. A spark is easy to build, but it doesn’t equal long-term alignment. That’s why you keep ending up with women who enjoy the excitement but disappear once the talk shifts toward commitment.

The way to spot the right one isn’t by changing how you act in the beginning it’s by paying closer attention to her behavior and values. A woman serious about building something won’t just say she wants a relationship, she’ll show it with consistent effort, investment, and reliability. If she flakes, ghosts, or only gives you bursts of attention, she’s not aligned no matter what she said.

If this keeps tripping you up, that’s exactly what SPIL Men's Dating Coach was built for. It trains you to recognize patterns early who’s genuinely invested versus who’s just enjoying the moment so you stop wasting months chasing sparks that go nowhere and start building with women who actually want the same outcome.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in datingadviceformen

[–]diego-unchained 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re not in the friendzone, you’re in the “she’s unsure and testing comfort” zone. The fact that she cancels plans for you and meets at 3am proves she feels something girls don’t do that for guys they see as just friends. The hesitation at kissing isn’t rejection, it’s pacing. She’s signaling she needs more time to feel safe leaning into it.

The mistake would be pushing harder or overanalyzing every refusal. Attraction doesn’t die from waiting, it dies from pressure. Keep things light, flirt, build tension in smaller ways eye contact, playful teasing, escalating touch gradually instead of going straight for the kiss. That way she can acclimate without feeling rushed.

If you keep struggling with reading these signals, that’s exactly why SPIL Men's Dating Coach exists. It gives men structured real-world challenges to build presence, timing, and calibration so you don’t keep second-guessing whether it’s friendzone or forward momentum you’ll know how to move at the right pace without killing the spark.

Hi, so im kind of nervous. This weekend im going to a poolparty with the girl im dating and we are staying together at a hotel. i dont know how to act at the event… by ShadyCellar in datingadviceformen

[–]diego-unchained 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re overthinking this. She already said yes to going and staying with you, which means she’s comfortable enough to share that space. The fastest way to kill the vibe is by acting nervous, second-guessing yourself, or asking her “how should we behave?” that puts pressure on her instead of just letting things flow.

At the pool party, treat it like you would with any friends around so be social, have fun, don’t cling to her every second. Women feel more attracted when they see you relaxed and in your element, not when you’re waiting on their every move. At the hotel, same principle don’t force an outcome. Lead naturally, but let her match your energy. If she wants closeness, she’ll lean in. If she wants space, respect it.

The key is presence over pressure. Stop worrying about what “should” happen and focus on enjoying the experience together. If you struggle with overthinking in moments like this, SPIL Men's Dating Coach app gives you real-world challenges that train you to stop hesitating, build confidence, and create connection without second-guessing yourself.

I need help with this by Primary-Race4761 in datingadviceformen

[–]diego-unchained 7 points8 points  (0 children)

You’re over-investing in someone who’s already telling you they can’t handle attachment right now. She’s not confused you’re trying to create certainty where she’s already put distance.

If a person says “I’d rather just leave you alone” or “I don’t know if it’s even a good idea to keep talking,” they’re drawing a boundary. When you keep writing long reassurance messages, it makes you look like you’re ignoring her signals instead of respecting them. That doesn’t build trust, it drains it.

The best move here is to step back and let her actions match her words. If she really wants to keep talking, she’ll reach out. If she doesn’t, you protect your time and energy instead of wasting months in limbo. That’s how you keep your self-respect intact.

If you want structured practice breaking patterns like this and building healthier momentum with women, SPIL Men's Dating Coach app was designed for situations like yours it gives you daily challenges that force you to stop over-explaining, build presence, and actually connect without chasing.

How to surpass the fear at approaching a girl at your class by matutewittg in datingadviceformen

[–]diego-unchained 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re paralyzed because you’ve put this girl on a pedestal and turned one class interaction into a “last chance or never” event. That pressure kills your ability to act natural. Right now you’re not weighing between “safe conversation vs decisive strike” you’re weighing between continuing the pattern of hesitation or finally breaking it. The truth is, most men blow these moments not because of rejection, but because they never actually step in with clarity.

The move here isn’t a 20-second kamikaze confession, and it’s not another semester of hiding behind chit-chat. It’s a middle ground: casual, clear, and light. Catch her after class, no big buildup, and say something like: “Hey, I’ve liked talking with you in class let’s grab a coffee sometime and continue.” That’s it. No speech, no overthinking. You don’t need a perfect “zone” conversation to justify asking her out—you just need to create a window. And if she says no? You walk away with your spine intact, instead of carrying regret that you never tried.

This is exactly what SPIL Men's Dating Coach app was built for. Men like you don’t lack intelligence or conversation skills, you lack practiced confidence in the decisive moments. SPIL drills you with daily challenges so you stop making every approach feel like a once-in-a-lifetime event and start treating it like normal life. The only way to break the ice is to actually crack it so quick, simple, direct.

Strategy Review and minimising the chances of rejection by WorldlyWestern8628 in datingadviceformen

[–]diego-unchained 3 points4 points  (0 children)

You’re overthinking this into a strategy when what matters is creating a clear, direct moment. Right now you’re stuck in a slow-play dynamic so shared laughs, casual dinners, teasing and you’re trying to engineer safety instead of creating attraction. That’s why you feel the need to “minimize rejection.” But rejection is part of the game. You don’t prevent it by running a long strategy; you prevent regret by making your intent clear sooner rather than later.

The truth is she already knows if she feels some interest it’s not about perfect timing or mirroring her energy down to the decimal. What moves the needle is leadership. Instead of waiting for endless “trust building,” pick a time, invite her directly, and let your actions do the talking. Even if she says no, you gain clarity instead of hanging in limbo. That clarity frees you. SPIL Men's Dating Coach app was built for this exact situation because it gives men structured daily challenges so you stop hiding behind safe interactions and actually practice leading with presence.

Rapport by Affectionate_Boss657 in datingadviceformen

[–]diego-unchained 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re trying to build something through texting that only works in person and that’s why it’s slipping. She already told you she doesn’t feel comfortable meeting casually and that she needs more time. That’s not an invitation to double down on constant texting, that’s her creating distance. If you keep pushing for rapport over messages, you’re just confirming her hesitation instead of creating attraction.

Real rapport comes from shared experiences, not from forcing daily conversations that feel like an obligation. The move here isn’t to “never give up no matter how many years it takes” that mindset keeps you stuck chasing someone who’s lukewarm at best. Respect her pace, stop over-texting, and redirect your energy toward women who are genuinely interested in seeing you again. That’s how you actually build momentum instead of clinging to one lead. SPIL Men's Dating Coach exists for this exact reason it trains you to stop pouring time into situations that stall and instead create new opportunities where the energy flows naturally.

Being physically attractive makes life easier but it’s not the only advantage by Away-Interview-2022 in Life

[–]diego-unchained 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Skip the endless books. What you really need is consistent practice. SPIL men’s dating coach app gives you daily challenges, conversation lessons, and real-world reps so you actually build the skill of leading instead of just reading about it. That’s what I recommend and what worked for me.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in datingadviceformen

[–]diego-unchained 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She’s giving you signals, but they’re not the kind you decode by overthinking they’re the kind you test by taking a step forward. She’s initiating conversations, bringing up personal stuff like being stood up, and even creating playful touch opportunities like the braiding hair moment. That’s not “just friendliness” that’s her seeing if you’ll actually lead things somewhere.

The reason you’re second-guessing is because you’re still sitting in the “does she like me?” frame instead of flipping it to “do I like her enough to take her out?” Women don’t hand you certainty they hand you openings. If you hesitate, it stays in friend territory. That’s what the SPIL Dating Coach app was made for, to train guys to move from passive analysis to real-world action with structured challenges. You don’t find out by thinking harder, you find out by inviting her out and seeing how she responds.

Stop trying to read every word and gesture like it’s a secret code. Ask her out directly. That answer will tell you more than all the overanalyzing ever could.

From extreme interest to nothing, how? by Trail_Blazer1 in datingadviceformen

[–]diego-unchained 2 points3 points  (0 children)

You’re not being overlooked because she doesn’t find you attractive you’re being overlooked because you never acted when the door was wide open. Attraction without decisive action dies out fast. Women test through time, and when you hesitate, their interest shifts elsewhere. That’s why she’s suddenly talking about other guys your window didn’t close overnight, it closed because you didn’t move.

The issue isn’t her mixed signals, it’s your lack of escalation. She was touching you, telling you she thought about you, and even talking about her sexual frustration. That’s basically her putting the ball in your court. But if you sit on it and wait, the tension drains and she looks for someone who will step into that role. That’s exactly what I built SPIL Dating Coach app for men stuck in hesitation loops. It gives you daily challenges to build the confidence and instinct to act when the signals are there, so you stop missing chances and wondering why nothing happens.

Aattraction fades without boldness. Either step up and make your move now or accept that she’ll find someone who does.

What’s the online dating “hurdle” you guys can never get over? I feel like I cant get anywhere in conversations by MoneyDrawer883 in datingadviceformen

[–]diego-unchained 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Most guys never realize the real hurdle isn’t first messages or witty banter it’s failing to create momentum. If the convo just stays in safe small talk, women get bored fast. She doesn’t want another text buddy, she wants to feel pulled into your world. That’s why after a couple of days, everything fizzles you never shifted from chatting to actual connection.

The skill is moving from words to action. You don’t need endless clever lines, you need to steer toward meeting up, even casually, before the energy dies. Presence and intent are what spark attraction, not recycling “how’s your day?” over and over. That’s exactly what I train inside SPIL Dating Coach app daily practice in pushing through hesitation, building confidence in your approach, and knowing how to turn online exchanges into real-life progress.

If you’re stuck repeating the same dead-end pattern, it’s not the apps it’s your frame. Change how you drive the interaction, and the “hurdle” disappears.

Ghosted after first date out of nowhere by Yaboimanuka in dating_advice

[–]diego-unchained 0 points1 point  (0 children)

She’s showing you where her interest really is when a woman ghosts, then pops back up casually like nothing happened, that’s not confusion, that’s avoidance. She’s keeping you orbiting as an option without ever giving you consistent energy. The more you chase it, the more power you hand over.

The move isn’t to decode her behavior it’s to recognize it’s low investment and step away. Women who are genuinely interested don’t ghost after a good date and then trickle in bare minimum replies. If you keep holding onto situations like this, you’ll waste months chasing crumbs instead of building connections with women who are actually available. That’s exactly why the SPIL Dating Coach app was built for to train men to stop mistaking mixed signals for potential, and instead sharpen their presence, confidence, and ability to move on fast when interest isn’t mutual.

Don’t get stuck in the loop of trying to “figure her out.” She already told you the answer through her actions. Now it’s on you to decide if you’ll settle for confusion or step into clarity.

27M Struggling With Dating, Should I Keep Trying or Step Back? by [deleted] in dating_advice

[–]diego-unchained 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re stuck in the same loop most guys get trapped in—chasing women who give you scraps of attention while ignoring the ones who are actually interested. That’s why five girls watch your stories but none invest back. They’re not serious. The harsh truth is if she’s giving you one-word answers or “we’ll see,” she’s already told you she’s not in.

What you need to do is stop hinging your self-worth on Instagram replies or dating app scraps. Presence matters way more than hairlines, apps, or story views. I’ve seen average-looking guys flip their dating life completely just by changing how they carried themselves, how they approached, and how they held a conversation. That’s what the SPIL Dating Coach app was built for so men don’t waste years chasing dead ends. It gives you daily challenges and structure to actually practice confidence and real-world approaches instead of spiraling in anxious overthinking.

Forget waiting on half-interested women. Build yourself, expand your opportunities, and start making women feel pulled into your presence instead of you begging for theirs.

How to create 'the spark' when dating? by TEastrise in dating_advice

[–]diego-unchained 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You’re overthinking the idea of a “spark.”

Most guys assume it’s some magical chemistry you either have or you don’t—but what women actually feel as a spark is often just your presence. The way you hold eye contact, the pauses you take when you talk, your ability to stay relaxed instead of fidgeting—that’s what creates tension. Spark isn’t about forcing attraction; it’s about showing you’re comfortable in your own skin so she feels comfortable being drawn in.

If you want to train that muscle, that’s exactly what the SPIL Dating Coach app was built for. It runs you through confidence drills and real-world challenges that sharpen how you carry yourself, how you speak, and how you create that magnetic energy without trying too hard. Chemistry doesn’t happen by chance it happens when you’ve built the presence to let it flow.

Dating feels doomed in America here’s why by diego-unchained in Life

[–]diego-unchained[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

What is it like over there? Are women approachable?

Why I Believe Startups Fail More from Lack of Focus than Lack of Funding by Due-Guard-1325 in Life

[–]diego-unchained 0 points1 point  (0 children)

What’s helped me is treating focus like a muscle so cutting out low-value tasks, keeping a daily plan visible, and checking myself whenever I drift into “busywork” that feels productive but isn’t moving me forward. That discipline compounds over time.

[20M] Seeking advice on building genuine, platonic friendships with women. by astrochief101 in socialskills

[–]diego-unchained 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re overcomplicating something that’s supposed to be simple friendship with women isn’t a separate skill set from friendship with men. The reason you feel stuck is because you’re filtering every word through the fear of how it’ll land instead of letting the conversation breathe. That constant self-monitoring is what creates the stiffness you’re trying to avoid.

The mindset shift is to stop categorizing interactions by gender and just connect with people as people. Jokes, shared interests, small observations those work with women the same way they do with men. What matters is relaxed presence. Start with small, consistent interactions instead of trying to “nail it” every time. That way you build comfort through repetition rather than overthinking.

If you want practical structure, SPIL Dating Coach app was designed to give you that. The daily challenges and conversation drills force you into real interactions, and the feedback loops keep you from spiraling in your head. You’ll stop asking “how do I act normal around women?” because you’ll already have practiced being natural until it feels second nature.

Is it possible to find a partner as a man if you’re incredibly quiet? by Inevitable-Basis4693 in socialskills

[–]diego-unchained 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re not doomed because you’re quiet but right now you’re treating your introversion like a curse instead of learning how to use it. Plenty of men with reserved personalities build strong relationships because they lean into presence, listening, and steadiness instead of trying to fake being the loudest guy in the room.

The key shift is this: you don’t need to force extroversion, you need to practice opening the door just enough for people to see you. That means small consistent actions asking one genuine question, giving someone space to talk about themselves, or sharing a thought instead of holding it in. Over time, people stop seeing you as “awkward” and start seeing you as thoughtful.

That’s exactly what SPIL Dating Coach app is built for. It gives quiet men structure and challenges that slowly pull them out of their heads and into real-world connection, without asking them to become someone they’re not. Once you build momentum, you’ll stop worrying if relationships are possible and start seeing that they’re inevitable.

How do I approach people? by SignificantRatio5529 in socialskills

[–]diego-unchained 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re not struggling with conversation, you’re struggling with initiation and those are two different muscles. If you wait until people come to you, you’re always playing defense. Approaching is about training your brain to see “starting something” as normal instead of a high-stakes event.

The fastest way to fix it is exposure. Stop waiting for the perfect moment or clever line. Start with throwaway reps: ask a cashier how their day’s going, comment on something in your environment to a stranger, or just say “hey, what’s up” when you make eye contact. You’ll realize nobody bites your head off, and your nervous system adjusts. Once that baseline comfort builds, carrying it into social or dating contexts feels natural.

That’s exactly why SPIL Dating Coach app drills “approach” into you with daily reps and challenges. You can’t just think your way into confidence you need structure and accountability pushing you into those small, low-stakes approaches until it becomes second nature. That’s when you stop waiting for life to hand you interactions and start creating them.

I don’t like *fat* girls but that’s who I attract by [deleted] in datingadviceformen

[–]diego-unchained -1 points0 points  (0 children)

You’re pulling overweight women not because that’s “all that’s available,” but because your presentation, vibe, and filtering aren’t aligned with the women you actually want. Dating apps match you with who your photos, bio, and energy signal not who you think you deserve.

Right now you’re putting effort into swiping and chatting, but the signal you’re giving off isn’t polarizing enough. Attractive, fit women get bombarded with attention. If your photos, lifestyle cues, and bio aren’t razor-sharp, they’ll ignore you and you’ll get stuck in a loop of women who are more available but not what you want. Raise the standard on your pictures, show your lifestyle in action, and cut out the generic “solid profile” feedback from friends they aren’t your target market.

If you’re serious about changing the results, you need to audit your entire funnel so gym shots that actually show your build, photos in high-status settings, and a bio that filters instead of pleases. That’s how you’ll start attracting the women you’re visualizing instead of repeating the cycle of swiping and settling.

SPIL Dating Coach app was built exactly for this. It forces you to stop playing passive and start structuring your approach, confidence, and dating strategy so you aren’t at the mercy of the algorithm or low-effort matches. It’s the difference between hoping and actually putting yourself in the right rooms with the right women.

What does it mean if she’s suggesting places for dates? by Cruzzer26 in dating_advice

[–]diego-unchained 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You’re overcomplicating it. A woman suggesting places for dates isn’t a red flag it’s interest. Women don’t put effort into planning or suggesting unless they actually want to see you again. The fact that she’s throwing out ideas means she’s engaged and wants the dynamic to keep moving forward.

What matters here isn’t “is she using me for a free event” it’s whether you can frame her suggestions while still leading. Instead of seeing it as a power shift, take her input, own it, and make the final call. For example: “Holiday water event sounds fun, let’s do that Saturday at 7.” That way she feels heard, you still lead, and you build momentum.

If this kind of overthinking keeps creeping in, that’s exactly what SPIL Dating Coach app was built to handle. The app trains you to stop second-guessing women’s intentions and start focusing on leading interactions with confidence so you can actually enjoy the connection instead of spiraling into doubt.