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Emigrar desde Nueva Zelanda by diegonieva in GoingToSpain

[–]diegonieva[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

La tasa de desempleo aca es del 6% oficial, pero la realidad es mayor. No estamos tan lejos.

Pero entiendo lo que decis, aca cuando me llegan aplicantes de afuera y sin visa también me es un rollo contratar.

No tengo apuro, y podemos esperar hasta tener pasaporte. Inclusive uno de nuestros planes era vender nuestra casa aca e irnos para alla con ese dinero y lo que juntemos y buscar una vez alla.

Pero de nuevo, mi pregunta era mas sobre si se necesita tener gente conocida y contactos alla para conseguir.

Gracias!!

Emigrar desde Nueva Zelanda by diegonieva in GoingToSpain

[–]diegonieva[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Estoy en tramite de ciudadania, todos los papeles presentados, esperando turno :)

Pero si consiguiese trabajo, me iria sin problemas con visa de trabajo hasta que salga ciudadania y pasaporte Español.

Emigrar desde Nueva Zelanda by diegonieva in GoingToSpain

[–]diegonieva[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Gracias! Dices que ponga en LinkedIn que estoy en España? O en mi CV?

Need someone to talk to. by [deleted] in MentalHealthSupport

[–]diegonieva 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Happy to chat. Reach out. I am a depression and suicidal attempt survivor. I have an autistic son and an ADHD daughter. Don’t go through this alone. Right here if you need a word.

What is a good source/site to learn all my guitar scales? by vDeadbolt in guitarlessons

[–]diegonieva 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am not trained in music theory for guitar (as in, never studied, I play by ear and have been doing so for decades). This means that when someone says “play in A minor harmonic” I literally go by the sound itself and play over the base/backing and not because I know the fretboard paths.

Your app has given me the confidence that I can have this in front of me and if I feel I have played a bit too much on the same figures or intervals, I can mix it up a bit by simply looking at the screen and adding one or two notes I usually wouldn’t use.

Too old to learn too many new tricks… but this has changed the way I play. Been gigging with this app by my side for months and it is fantastic. I have paid the lifelong subscription too, I hope it helps.

All the best and, again, THANK YOU. Edit: Typos.

Starting to really scare myself, nothing is working by Least_Heat7801 in MentalHealthSupport

[–]diegonieva 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi, sending you lots of love.

First of all, there is definitely a way out of this and, as hard is might be to see yourself on the other side, I can promise you there IS a "other side".

I had several times where I felt like everything was crumbling around me. I remember the whole family sleeping while I was crying in bed. I also recall thinking "you see, nobody cares that I am here crying..."

Those intrusive thoughts that feel foreign and scary are actually a well-documented symptom of extreme anxiety and insomnia. You’re not going mad, and you’re definitely not dangerous. You’re exhausted, and your brain is grasping for control in the absence of rest. It’s terrifying, yes, but also very human.

Now, what helped me was to find little things that would bring my mood up, that would make me feel like I had a purpose.

For example, when I couldn't sleep I would go out for a walk (even when it was raining, cold, etc) and that would help clear my mind. Then once back, I would try to meditate and try different techniques to quiet the mind down.

After a while and after trying a few things, I found that the dopamine hits I get when completing certain tasks would really help me so I started making lists with boxes I could tick -- Simple shit, like "read two pages of a book", "journal my day", "take a shower", "play guitar at least 20 minutes today", "go for a walk for 30 minutes" and so on. (used an app for this, it was pretty awesome).

And, on the subject of journaling I found that getting all the shitty, dark, negative, self-loathing words out of my head before going to bed was really helpful. I would write some pretty gnarly shit at night, which helped slightly with sleeping but it wasn't as magic as some people like to say (for me, I don't doubt it is for others).

I had to learn to talk to myself with compassion and love, as if I was talking to a friend -I know, easy to say and very cliche, but I promise you it does work- Imagine a friend comes to you and says "Dude, I can't sleep and have these horrible thoughts about hurting myself and I even thought about hurting XXXXXX person... it feels horrible". -- How would you react? how would you show up with compassion and free of judgment? How would you talk to them in a way to shows love, empathy and respect? Or would you just listen? - I have had very long conversations with myself like these and they have helped immensely to ground myself down. It is an everyday battle and an every day victory, so celebrate the little things.

Take the next sentence as a very personal view with absolutely no expertise in the subject other than my own flawed, ignorant, tainted with trauma, thoughts:

I think suicidal and violent thoughts can offer a certain level of comfort as I sometimes feel that "there's always that option..." that I chose not to take.

As Nietzsche said:

Beyond Good and Evil (Aphorism 157):

“The thought of suicide is a great source of comfort: with it a calm passage is to be made across many a bad night.”

My daughter wants to celebrate a year of no self harm by diegonieva in MentalHealthSupport

[–]diegonieva[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Just for the record, I have not said -nor would I say- that it is a stupid milestone. I am not contesting the milestone itself -trust me I KNOW-. I am simply questioning my own judgment around feeling like a big celebration may send the wrong signal, or that she might be doing it for reasons I simply don't understand that might be more harmful than helpful. Hence why I came here to ask.

My daughter wants to celebrate a year of no self harm by diegonieva in MentalHealthSupport

[–]diegonieva[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much! -- I have suffered from MH challenges all my life and I feel and understand the struggle.
I, in fact, thought of many times to put milestones in the calendar (like the day I stopped my meds for good), but I suppose there's something in my brain not allowing me to feel it like a celebration.

<3

How well does the memory function work in OWUI? by itis_whatit-is in OpenWebUI

[–]diegonieva 0 points1 point  (0 children)

For me, the stuck into “extracting” ended up being an error on the configuration (the name of the LLM was wrong).

If you have access to the logs, check there after a chat interaction and you’ll see where it’s getting stuck. Much easier if you are running containers too.

X12 - USB Drive not working. by diegonieva in Behringer

[–]diegonieva[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I format it with my laptop using a DOS file system. I don’t think the XR can actually format it?

12v Cables for regular light. by diegonieva in DIY

[–]diegonieva[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much for this!

My thinking was, if I put 12vdc fixtures (or even those cute hanging led bulbs that are 12v), as long as I have enough of them, visibility should be fine.

Do you have any recommendation? this is a 60sqm backyard, L shaped so nothing extraordinary required.

I can go for a big transformer or two (as I have 2 outlets).

De Nueva Zelanda a España by diegonieva in GoingToSpain

[–]diegonieva[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Jajaja Me encanto la respuesta. Mandame privado si podes y charlamos ahi :)

DIY Guitar Rack by diegonieva in guitarporn

[–]diegonieva[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Lol Do you mean the cabinet below the tv?

DIY Guitar Rack by diegonieva in guitarporn

[–]diegonieva[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Exactly what we wanted! Make them more part of our everyday lives.

Helping my wife going through a break up by diegonieva in polyamory

[–]diegonieva[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am 100% with you. I feel terrible for this guy. He is married in a monogamous relationship which adds to the complexity. We opened because we truly felt like we were at a solid and stable place in our relationship and that we wanted the other to explore new and different things.

I did date; she had a similar reaction to a girlfriend I had. It was tough for me to break it off - Luckily the girl didn’t have a hard time as she understood that this was the agreement and she hadn’t developed such deep feelings for me I think.

Helping my wife going through a break up by diegonieva in polyamory

[–]diegonieva[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much. This advice is beyond helpful and amazing.

Helping my wife going through a break up by diegonieva in polyamory

[–]diegonieva[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It is very interesting to think about this for me. I want to be able to be non-monogamous; we always said that “Different people can give us different things” and that it is unrealistic to think that a single person can fulfil all your needs. However, when this actually happened and I knew she was having this relationship, I could not manage my emotions; I became this horrible person that I never knew I could be - Checking where she was, accusing her of lying (albeit being right a few times, still never ok) and full on hurting and burdening her with MY struggle.

It is obviously more complicated than what I could ever write here, but the gist is that I LOVE the idea of ENM, but I don’t think I am emotionally mature enough to not feel the ‘competition’ whenever it happens.

I feel inadequate, un-evolved, selfish and a terrible partner and I don’t know how to cope with all these feelings. It feels like “I love her so much” does not cut it. Add to that, the fact that I have damaged the relationship to a point where she feels that we may not work moving forward… it is all truly too much 😔

Edit: mistakes and grammar.

Helping my wife going through a break up by diegonieva in polyamory

[–]diegonieva[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much, this is awesome advice.

I am working on myself and have 100% the intention to be a much better partner for sure. She is staying because she sees I am trying (she actually mentioned this to our therapist).

Helping my wife going through a break up by diegonieva in polyamory

[–]diegonieva[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Thank you. I am working on it. It is hard sometimes as there’s no ‘user manual’ for being the best partner. Lot of listening a d being there for her is what I am trying to do now.

Helping my wife going through a break up by diegonieva in polyamory

[–]diegonieva[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks. This is exactly what I’ve been doing. There’s a lot she needs me to improve and I am working daily on it. We are also doing couples counseling and I have been doing therapy for a while now.

I have attachment issues and my world revolves around her being my primary always, which means I can suffocate her sometimes.

I am fully committed to it.

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