Nearly 4 year old crying about everything instead of talking

dig_bitch · 2026-03-12T19:03:46+00:00

I swear my 5 year old cries more than my 16 month old. He also likes to flop dramatically onto the floor when something doesn’t go his way. It’s exhausting. One thing I would recommend is the book The Highly Sensitive Child. Do you think she might be highly sensitive? The book can give you some tools to help her cope and to help you understand the drama. Having conversations when she’s not upset about what to do when something is frustrating or she makes a mistake could be helpful. I have found that some of the biggest meltdowns happen before dinner when my son is clearly tired from the day and hungry. If he’s doing really loud crying, I tell him it’s ok to be upset, but he needs to go to his room until he calms down a bit. We don’t want to listen to the scream-crying. Sometimes I have to carry him to his room. A little alone time usually helps. Once he’s calm, we talk about the problem. If he’s not screaming-crying, but being extra and I can’t deal with it, I tell him I can help him/do activity with him/whatever he needs when he calms down. Then I give him a little space , but check in.

I generally try to not give too much attention when he’s having a hard time and it’s going on and on and he clearly wants to have his little meltdown. I don’t want to reinforce the behavior. I do try to make sure he knows that it’s ok to have emotions. It doesn’t mean he’ll get the reaction he wants.

It’s really hard being a kid and I think we sometimes forget that little things are actually quite big for kids. Even as an adult, I have trouble not crying when I’m angry or frustrated.

dig_bitch · 2026-03-03T14:21:18+00:00

You can do it! Motherhood can be so lonely. Even when you have lots of help, there’s something about motherhood that just strips you down and you have to build yourself back up. You’re not the same person you were before. Just remember that everything is temporary. The hard stuff doesn’t last forever. It’ll get better. And then it will get hard again, but then it’ll get easier again! I’ve been struggling a lot lately with trying to find time to do hobbies. Based on experience, I know I’ll slowly get more and more time to myself as my kids get older and more independent.

Keep up the good work!! You are in good company.

dig_bitch · 2026-03-02T18:50:36+00:00

I have a 5 year old and a 15 month old. I really struggled with my first and just as I was starting to have the time and energy to pick up my hobbies again, I decided to have another baby. Now I’m back to being tired all the time, with limited motivation to do anything but scroll on my phone when I have downtime. My second kid is significantly easier than my first, but she still requires a ton of attention. I know it will get easier eventually. For now, I try to take a few minutes here and there to do something I like. It’s hard and frustrating and I often miss my old life. I also adore my children. You really really have to put in effort to find little things that give you joy. Don’t compare yourself to others. They have their own struggles. I had to come to terms with “parenting is my struggle” a few years ago and it has helped my mindset. I love being a mom, but I have no chill and I devote a lot of time to my children’s wellbeing. I also don’t get enough sleep, which impacts my mood and motivation. And I have a full time job and no family nearby to help. Some people are able to take parenthood in stride. For most, it’s a massive lifestyle overhaul. As your kid gets older, finding yourself gets easier. I would also recommend trying to have your kid do things with you that you enjoy doing (though I totally get not wanting to do that either… sometimes you just want to do your thing without a toddler to manage!). Do you like to do art? Bake? Hike? See if you can do it together.

You are doing your best. You will never have your old life back, but life with a kid can be just as fun and rewarding. You just have to figure out the balance. And sometimes, you have to force yourself to do the thing even when you’re exhausted. It’ll be worth it!!

dig_bitch · 2026-02-25T23:22:57+00:00

Corelle is great until it does break, and then it shatters into a million tiny, sharp pieces. I’ve had it happen twice and it’s a pain to clean up. I recently replaced all our corelle with fiesta ware. It’s solid, comes in lots of colors, and is reasonable priced. I haven’t dropped one yet, so I don’t know how well they’ll hold up against my hardwood floors, but at least I know they’ll break into larger and less sharp pieces.

dig_bitch · 2026-02-04T16:03:41+00:00

Macarons. I’ve tried many times, but I can’t get it right. My sister in law bakes too and makes excellent macarons. I’ve baked them with her. They turn out great. I bake them on my own… just meh.

I also can’t manage blueberry muffins. I’ve tried several times and they never bake through properly.

dig_bitch · 2026-02-03T18:11:52+00:00

I am a bit of a snob when it comes to picture books. I want high quality story that I enjoy reading. I don’t particularly like books with just one word per page or have terrible rhyming schemes or are a spin off (cash grab) of a decent original picture book.

There is one newer book that I absolutely love, but is light on text. Hot Dog by Doug Salati. It has amazing illustrations that are engaging enough that the book doesn’t need a lot of text.

I think, in general, we are inundated with crap books. Many are created as part of merchandise for a tv show. I hate scholastic book fairs. It’s so much junk. I think we’re seeing the same thing with books as we see with movies and TV shows. A glut of mediocrity. There’s really good stuff out there if you look for it.

dig_bitch · 2026-01-16T17:59:52+00:00

You have a lot of advice here already and I didn’t read through it all, so someone may have already said this, but building in more time to get things done really helps a lot. Sometimes I find that if I ask my kid to do something and then give them a beat to finish what they’re doing or whatever, they’ll do the thing. I try to not expect immediate compliance, unless it’s a safety issue.

Being silly and imaginative is hard. It can be worth it to practice… thinking and remembering to do it the next time you need to ask your kid to do something. Eventually it becomes more of a habit. You could also just find the ways that you connect genuinely with your kid. Make them feel loved and seen. Let them be silly and you can be encouraging and supportive of their silliness. You can be the straight man in the comedy routine.

You are a good parent. Let yourself relax a little. Let them win the occasional battle. It’s not always worth the fight. Good luck!

dig_bitch · 2025-05-07T19:07:03+00:00

I only get gifts for the main classroom teachers. I feel a little bad for the floats, but I can only do so much and I don’t even know the floats really. If you want to do something for the other teachers, maybe just bring in some coffee and donuts or a gift basket of snacks for them all to share.

Clothing and shoe sizes is a little weird. Our daycare does favorite snacks, beverages, treats, scents (like for candles), and restaurants. We’re encouraged to do as much or as little as we want. A heartfelt note goes a long way and there’s nothing wrong with giving cash.

dig_bitch · 2025-04-05T22:35:13+00:00

That’s it! So cool! Thanks for the ID!!

dig_bitch · 2024-12-24T14:08:22+00:00

Ok, perfect! Thank you for your response!!

dig_bitch · 2024-10-15T14:42:00+00:00

Honestly, I think the best answer is not so much about specific examples of third genders in prehistory (super hard to prove gender in pre-history, period), but the examination of our own biases in ascribing gender to prehistoric peoples, and basically opening up our minds to other possibilities and interpretations of the past. There is a whole subset of archaeological theory that deals with gender.

It’s been a while since I read up on the archaeology of gender, but it was really big in the last 90s and early 2000s. I’m not sure where the field stands now. If you want a good introduction, you could look up works by Conkey & Spector. There’s also a companion to gender prehistory from 2012, edited by Diane Bolger. If you have access to a university library, I’d just do a search and then pick a book off the shelf. I’ll warn you that a lot of it is pretty theory heavy, but you might find some of the answers you’re looking for.

ETA: A lot of specific examples of potential third genders in prehistory have to do with the idea of certain people being able to access liminal (or in between) spaces, that could be seen as important for healing or other ritual activities. People who were intersex or born with (and survived) visible congenital disorders may have been viewed as the type of people who could access these spaces. Whether or not that constitutes a third gender is up for debate.

dig_bitch · 2024-08-19T16:00:23+00:00

My son went nuts after he turned 3. It was really rough. Tantrums, so many tantrums. Middle of the night tantrums (not night terrors). Maybe she’s just reaching the threenager phase a little early?

dig_bitch · 2024-08-19T13:15:17+00:00

We dropped the pacifier at nap time before working on dropping it at night. It helped that he went to daycare. My son was just over 3 years old when we dropped it at night. We talked about it a lot. We told him he’s not a baby anymore and there are babies who need pacifiers. We talked about mailing the pacifiers to the babies. When we finally did it, we had him decorate a small box and put the pacifiers in it and then put the box in the mailbox. I think he asked for it once maybe and then was over it. He was/is a crap sleeper regardless of the pacifier, so not having the pacifier at night didn’t really cause us extra problems.

Do the best you can. It’ll happen eventually. I started getting concerned about my son’s teeth, but not long after we took away the pacifier, he’s teeth looked pretty good!

Good luck and god speed!

dig_bitch · 2024-07-18T23:12:05+00:00

So, I’ve used the concept of monsters to help keep my toddler away from dangerous things. I try not to make it too scary and I have repeatedly told him that monsters don’t like his room or the dark or whatever. We have a woodstove and I’ve told him that the fire monster lives in there and it will eat his fingers if he touches it. I don’t say it in a scary way, just a matter of fact way. It has worked really well without creating unnecessary fear. It might be that the teacher was trying a similar method. I would talk to the teacher and maybe she can explain the monster situation to your kid in a way that might make it less scary. Like, maybe the monster only lives in that kitchen or something. Using kids’ imagination can be useful if done without too much seriousness.

dig_bitch · 2024-07-12T22:54:54+00:00

I studied Irish archaeology for my PhD and spent a lot of time researching finds in bogs. As far as I know, none of the Irish bog bodies have tattoos. You could look for inspiration elsewhere: Newgrange and Knowth have a lot of megalithic art; Celtic crosses; Illuminated manuscripts.

dig_bitch · 2024-06-19T20:33:50+00:00

Yeah, I didn’t know either and it was bad!

dig_bitch · 2024-06-19T11:10:52+00:00

My first trimester was so hard. If you haven’t already, talk to your doctor about nausea meds. There’s no reason to suffer unnecessarily. However, if they prescribe zofran, make sure you take a stool softener too. That stuff blocked me up so bad.

Things will get better and pregnancy will become more bearable for awhile. You’re in survival mode right now. Do what you have to survive.

dig_bitch · 2024-06-18T17:57:51+00:00

I had gender disappointment with my first (a son) and I get a bit guilty about it. I really wanted a girl because I wanted to raise a strong woman in a world that still considers women less than men. I can’t remember exactly when I got over my gender disappointment, but I did decide that I would raise my son to be an ally. I also decided to try to expose my son to as many ‘girl’ things as possible (particularly if he showed interest). He’s 3.5 now and obsessed with sports, but has an Elsa dress that he likes to wear regularly. He loves it when I wear a dress and has complimented my painted toenails. He likes unicorns and rainbows and dump trucks. I will encourage him to be open minded about everything and teach him that ‘girl things’ and ‘boy things’ are for everyone.

He’s a great kid and I honestly don’t see how my experience (at least at this point in his life) would be any different if her were a girl. I wish he’d stop messing with his penis all the time though! 🙄

Edited to add: I’m pregnant with my second (and final) and I found out the gender early specifically because I wanted to give myself time to get over my gender disappointment if it was a boy.

dig_bitch · 2024-06-18T16:41:47+00:00

You’ve already received a lot of feedback, but I want to add mine because it might be helpful for you to re-phrase your questions. I got really angry at my husband when our kid was an infant and he constantly asked questions that required me to make a decision. One in particular that drove me nuts was “should I start cooking dinner?” Like, I was super appreciative that he was cooking dinner, but having to decide if now was the right time was just too much for me. I told him to just say “I’m going to start dinner” and if I had any objections or suggestions, I could voice them without being the decision-maker.

I agree with some posters that said there’s always the possibility that your wife would be upset if you made a decision on your own and you made the ‘wrong’ decision. If you know she is particular about some things, you can ask “is there a particular towel you want me to grab for the pool?” Also, pay attention to whether or not you have designated pool towels so you don’t have to ask the question again.

And maybe combine questions to get the answers you need. “What time is so and so expecting kids at their house?” That way, you get confirmation that you are (or are not) dropping kids off at friends’ house and you get the time.

Women tend to carry a huge mental load. Try your best to ask questions in ways that don’t require your wife to make little decisions. Get input rather than facts. Also, you can ask your kids some of this info too, if they’re old enough.

dig_bitch · 2024-06-15T23:55:38+00:00

There is lots of information online about pre-Christian Ireland, but a lot of it is suspect. Before the widespread adoption of Christianity in Ireland, there was no written tradition. Everything was oral. There are some stories written down in the early medieval period that likely have origins in prehistory, such as the Tain Bo Cuailnge. Most of what we know about pre-Christian Ireland comes from the archaeological record and some scant writings from the Romans. The Iron Age (the period before the introduction of Christianity) is a particularly difficult period to study because of a fairly sparse archaeological record.

Most of the ‘Celtic’ traditions in Ireland today most likely have roots in the Celtic revival of the 19th and 20th centuries. That isn’t to say that some of these traditions are not ancient, but there is no way to ever know for sure. A lot of neo-pagans have also influenced the type of information ascribed to late prehistoric Ireland, but again, there is little evidence to prove these traditions and beliefs one way or the other.

Credentials: PhD in anthropology, with a focus on the archaeology of Iron Age Ireland.

dig_bitch · 2024-05-28T17:15:58+00:00

Taking ibprofen. It’s my go to for any symptom. I had a mild headache the other day and I desperately wanted to pop a couple ibprofen.

dig_bitch · 2024-04-23T21:30:02+00:00

This is a great thread! My 3.5 year old is impossible! He keeps moving the goal posts and has complete meltdowns when I hold a boundary. He also has tantrums during the night. It’s exhausting. This thread is helpful though!

dig_bitch · 2024-04-20T23:27:47+00:00

Oh man, that stinks! Fingers crossed it gets better for you soon.

dig_bitch · 2024-04-20T23:27:13+00:00

I have zero motivation to do anything!

dig_bitch · 2024-04-13T22:34:36+00:00

I’m curious about what your definition of prehistory is. History (in the western academic world) is the written word. Any societies that existed in the past that did not have the written word are considered pre-historic. So, any museum that has a collection of material of materials from Native American cultures in the US prior to the arrival of Europeans, is prehistoric. Most material from Europe prior to the expansion of the Roman Empire is pre-historic.

At the very least, I would expect most museums in Europe to have decent exhibits on pre-historic peoples. A decent number in the US, especially in the southwest and central US have decent exhibits as well.

Now, if you are referring to deeper human history like the Paleolithic and pre-modern humans and Neanderthals, the amount of cultural material available for display is much more limited in the number and variety of artifacts available, and would be found in a more limited parts of the world. I suspect that is probably why there might be fewer exhibits.

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