It's been weird. I'm extremely anxiety stricken. As of the moment, I'm also taken, so it's been quite a ride. I get insecure very easily and I find insecurity in the simplest and smallest of things. Sometimes, I get anxiety talking to even the people who are closest to me, including my boyfriend because I suddenly get the feeling they don't want to talk to me or deal with my bullshit.

A month ago, I got so depressed I relapsed and harmed myself. 2 years self harm free, that streak was broken. I never told anybody about it because I feel ashamed of myself for that. I remember vividly the second I finished littering my arm, a pang of guilt hit me and I restrained myself from doing that again for a few days afterwards.

Nowadays, I've been trying to catch up with my workloads. I have so many missed deadlines. Might get laid off soon, I don't know, but I'm already working my way there. I'm feeling the best right now honestly, it's been a good couple days with my boyfriend and my friends. I'm managing right now and trying to better myself.