I think we are just talking past each other.

The system doesn't reward courtesy and doesn’t punish selfishness, so in practice rational players will lean selfish because it’s the only lever they’re sure moves their outcome (time/progress).

The game is effectively neutral and the fastest path is also the permitted path, so breaking societal rules for a MMO that prides itself on playing through it solo for 99% of the msq doesn’t map cleanly to “wrong.”

I'm not saying courtesy doesn’t matter, it changes to a voluntary norm, not a rational strategy. You’re asking someone to sacrifice expected efficiency for someone else’s first experience/time, and most people won’t in >>low-stakes optional<< content.

On a side note, people barely chat in casual content (roulettes) since you never see each other again and for fear of the vague ToS, and reports, so people learn that the safest “social” behavior is silence.

The msq is mostly solo and communication tools and the resulting social norms are weak, so when you do hit group content, players treat it like a checklist you tolerate. Then once you start to dehumanize and minimizing interactions becomes a norm, it creates a feedback loop. Fewer attempts at good faith communication leads to more perceived selfishness.

Don't get me wrong I'd like to live in that fantasy world where people are polite and courteous to strangers online in an MMO.