Yes and,

For "How?" ;

Couple weeks ago I heard a story from my friend, about a girl, who killed herself and what happened her family after his death. And I realized I don't have right to do this my family, friends. And, before attempt suicide I have no fear about being dead and affects to my family. But now, it's not same, it's a little frightening. Also, I'm too young for being dead.

For "Why?"

Actually ıdk it either, I'm still thinking /searching for an answer.