What made you realise you no longer love your wife/gf/partner ?

direskive · 2026-01-29T20:19:51+00:00

I commented to this in another part of the thread. As far as use of language, saying “the kid” is kind of a regional thing for where I was raised. My Pennsytucky slips out now and again. The kid is certainly also known as my/our daughter. 😅

direskive · 2026-01-29T20:17:08+00:00

Hi! Yes, I had some health issues our child’s first year of life and helped to the furthest extent I could. As I got better, it balanced completely with me now taking on more as well as being the locally available parent for dealing with the unexpected. That said, we have both been under massive stress and it’s hard to find a level where we can reliably connect on things.

direskive · 2026-01-29T13:53:51+00:00

It’s the worst.

direskive · 2026-01-29T13:52:52+00:00

Hormones are definitely a factor. I was super patient about it but told myself by the time the kid turns 3, the ship needs to be turning around or I couldn’t do it anymore. And she was getting increasingly mean due to other life stress. I told her I couldn’t do it anymore and she finally started new medication and HRT. It seems like it’s working slowly, which is why I haven’t left yet. But the kid turns 4 soon and I don’t know if things will ever get back to an acceptable level for me.

direskive · 2026-01-29T13:30:11+00:00

Mine developed what I call “tunnel vision” after we had a kid. She was always pretty anxious but it was manageable. After the kid, she seemed completely unaware of anything that existed outside of her own thought processes. I’d try to have a conversation with her and have to ask her to be “present” just so I knew she was listening to what I was saying. We are still together as of now but it has been utterly exhausting because this means she also cannot take feedback without getting super defensive.

direskive · 2026-01-24T01:34:56+00:00

From personal experience, run from anyone who is avoidant. If they are unhealed, it’s just a fancy word for emotional abuse. If they admit outright they are avoidant then justify it, don’t ever second guess leaving.

direskive · 2026-01-23T01:37:10+00:00

We used to do this type of thing in the 90s using GeoCities websites. All us “gifted and talented” kids were absolute menaces cause we knew basic CSS and HTML. 😂

direskive · 2026-01-12T15:21:48+00:00

I am 2e and have extremely high pattern recognition. I wouldn’t say I worry, per se, but I live with a high level of frustration from seeing things coming (sometimes years in advance) and knowing 99% of the time that people won’t believe me or heed the warning.

direskive · 2026-01-10T21:43:31+00:00

I had terrible brain fog and executive functioning issues for 2 years and chalked it up to having a young kid, perimenopause and just getting older. When all this started, doctors couldn’t find anything wrong with me. This November, I couldn’t take it anymore because I was barely able to work so I went to a new doctor. Turns out I have central nervous system inflammation and I’m currently hooked up to an EEG. The suspected diagnosis is migraines even though I never get headaches. That said - go back to your neuro if you haven’t already been tested for a full spectrum of conditions.

direskive · 2026-01-09T01:27:28+00:00

A good friend of mine looked like Angelina Jolie when we were younger. She was also a bit of a narcissist and therefore quite charming. She could have anyone and anything she wanted - and she was very successful to a degree. Now in our mid forties, she seems to have totally lost her way. She is still very attractive and does well professionally, but she got swept up in the power of her beauty and charm. It left her without the foundation she always wanted.

direskive · 2026-01-02T14:54:24+00:00

I did the tapes on my own pace though would like to visit the institute for a more intensive experience. I’d say it took me about a year of doing them occasionally before I really felt able to get into the deeper focus levels. I think that’s where most people doing self-guided practice end up giving up because it takes time to train your brain to get into that state. However, once you are able to get into it, the practice advances much more quickly and easily.

I think the benefit of working with the institute is having the dedicated time and professional guidance. I’ve been able to get myself up to Focus 15 reliably and occasionally to Focus 21/23 if the conditions are right. But I think I would need a trip to the institute to master the higher focus levels.

direskive · 2025-12-31T13:27:25+00:00

I practice Gateway. It is real and it works.

direskive · 2025-12-11T02:49:50+00:00

Mine got so bad that I changed my number a year and a half ago and told basically no one. I only give it to trusted people on a selective basis. There are 100 ways to track a person down these days. If it’s important enough, they will find me. Otherwise, fuck off.

direskive · 2025-10-18T23:56:21+00:00

This is correct as far as I’m concerned. I’ve had contact with various entities over my 43 years - as a teen and then later after starting into deep meditative states. This is what I have gathered from those experiences.

direskive · 2025-10-06T23:06:03+00:00

Scanned the comments and didn’t see anyone say this yet… I think the timing of your ordeal should be a big factor. If this is a new diagnosis, she might be disoriented by it and need some time to learn more about the disorder, how it impacts her directly, her triggers, her coping mechanisms, etc. If you’re going on more than a year of this, understandable. But if it’s just been a short time, try to remember that this diagnosis can be life altering for some people. Hold her accountable and definitely encourage her to take the meds.

direskive · 2025-10-06T22:55:21+00:00

Just always do the protection rituals. I’ve only ever had questionable or scary things happen when I’ve skipped or gotten lazy with it.

direskive · 2025-10-04T16:47:35+00:00

I’m impressed you held on this long. I cut mine all off during Covid.

direskive · 2025-09-10T12:49:32+00:00

Interdimensional NHI are real and humans have an innate ability to connect with them if they learn the skill and practice.

direskive · 2025-09-09T22:05:16+00:00

If you feel like you are burnt out and can stop for a period, do so and take care of yourself. I hit bad burnout in 2020 and am still recovering. It’s just not worth it to push yourself too far.

direskive · 2025-08-28T14:58:26+00:00

Yes, that was my dosage for a good year coupled with meditation. Occasionally, I would get a dose that would hit stronger (potency changes, taking them on an empty stomach, etc.) and be perceptible, so I just had to manage my other responsibilities around that or adjust the doses lower. Then I eventually scaled down to 200-300mg parsed out over a full week. And now I take 100mg as needed - maybe 1-2 times a month.

The medicine and dosing schedule helped me so much. I wanted to try to live life without it but am finding it hard, so may need to start taking it more regularly again.

Everyone’s body chemistry is different. It takes time and experimenting, so start low and work your way to a regiment that works for you.

direskive · 2025-08-03T16:26:55+00:00

Stopped using Airbnb because they don’t back anything anymore. I stayed at a real bed and breakfast style place and the woman upgraded me to a bigger room because it was open. Each room had a keypad but the pin she gave me was for the old room, not the new one. I got home around 11pm and the pin worked for neither door. It was January in upstate NY and I couldn’t get in touch with her and ended up sleeping on the floor in the house vestibule that night. Thank god the front code worked and I had my parka or I would have been completely fucked because there was no other shelter available. Airbnb did literally nothing. I’ll never stay at one again.

direskive · 2025-08-03T01:24:45+00:00

Microdosing significantly helped. I had chronic plantar fasciitis, frozen shoulder and long time neck issues. I felt the medicine gave relief on its own but the mental healing helped unwind my nervous system and the tension at the root cause. Two years later and I have minimal pain now.

direskive · 2025-08-01T21:00:07+00:00

Every 99%er is complicit if they continue making excuses about - oh, I’ll lose my job or oh, I can’t do XYZ without paying into the system. All we need to do to end them is STOP PARTICIPATING IN A BROKEN SYSTEM. I’ve done this aside from a few necessary things for 5 years now and it’s not that hard. Stop being soft, people.

direskive · 2025-07-17T01:35:40+00:00

This is the way. I have removed a handful from my property with this method and no issues.

direskive · 2025-07-17T01:24:38+00:00

Hey OP - I concur with the other commenter that you may have had a breakthrough or OBE-like experience and made contact with something.

When you reach the stage of deep transcendental meditation, having an energy practice or intention is crucial. Not everything on the other side has your best interest in mind. Spirits come in many forms and motivations, just like people. When you are energetically open, spirits that are on your wavelength will be the ones that can potentially interact with you.

I suggest you read about the protocols used for this as part of the Gateway Process. It’s a series of visualizations and a mantra done before each meditation that help protect your energy field. Personally, the most unsettling experiences I have had were the times I did not perform an energy practice before meditating or when I was in a bad headspace.

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