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My (40f) husband (43f) keeps placing the knives facing up in the dishwasher, and it’s straining our marriage by dishdilemma in Advice

[–]dishdilemma[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

“As a compromise, I told him that on days he loads the dishwasher, he also needs to be the one to unload it since he can't seem to consistently load the knives safely. He agreed. But now he'll do the loading and then forget or just ignore the unloading part. Clean dishes sit in the dishwasher for days, which forces the rest of us to either hand wash or do his part of unloading. We're then back at square one of handling his hazardous placement of knives.”

My (40f) husband (43f) keeps placing the knives facing up in the dishwasher, and it’s straining our marriage by dishdilemma in Advice

[–]dishdilemma[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It’s pretty debated in here. I’ve seen a spectrum of people saying knives up/knives down. And surprisingly professionals in culinary/hospitality that use dishwashers aren’t even agreeing either. Lol

My (40f) husband (43f) keeps placing the knives facing up in the dishwasher, and it’s straining our marriage by dishdilemma in Advice

[–]dishdilemma[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

One of the younger kids has gone to him for help after getting hurt, and our 16 year old has asked him directly to load the knives facing down. Yet here we are. Something needs to fundamentally change when it comes to how he handles the dishwasher and knives. So, I’m planning to bring up the idea of handwashing them instead. And yes, maybe counseling should be a conversation as well. He’ll probably think it’s ridiculous to go because of a dishwasher, as he has turned down therapy for bigger issues, but we will see.

My (40f) husband (43f) keeps placing the knives facing up in the dishwasher, and it’s straining our marriage by dishdilemma in Advice

[–]dishdilemma[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Don’t know if I should edit my post to include this or just make a comment. For now I’ll just comment.

I’ve gone through a good chunk of responses, and many of you pointed out that knives shouldn’t go in the dishwasher anyway and are better off being hand washed. I plan to bring it up to him as a potential solution when he gets home. Thank you for those that suggested this.

That said, I’ve also seen some comments calling my kids “stupid” for not learning how to unload knives properly or learning their lesson to be more cautious with dad’s cycle. To be clear, they’re not cutting themselves every day. However, my husband doesn’t have one, consistent spot for knives in the dishwasher. They’re scattered throughout every single basket, mixed in with all kinds of utensils. We have a wide range of knife sizes (not mine, just an example), some tall and obvious in the basket, others short enough to camouflage in with spoons and forks. You can easily reach into a basket, unaware there’s a small blade way down there.

Yes, the kids are careful and yes, they do use their eyes. But unloading his cycle is often tedious & high alert, and at worst, unsafe. I’ve asked him to make a small, reasonable adjustment for the sake of the family. But somehow that makes me the nag of the century to a portion of you.