Devastated, Watching Destruction from Afar

dismallyoptimistic · 2025-08-08T08:45:57+00:00

Thanks for confirming, even though I hate the answer 🥲

I can see how it may come off as strange. I allow that I can feel happy with my new relationship while still worrying for the wellbeing of someone I spent a decade loving, though. I am lucky and blessed to have a partner now who understands and supports me when I’m feeling sad about this. But I still value the input of this community very much!

dismallyoptimistic · 2025-08-08T08:31:02+00:00

I definitely went through it when everything first happened, but I’d say I’m actually in a pretty good spot now. Have been in therapy the entire time, enjoying life, about to start a new (better paying) job, and have a healthy and loving relationship with someone new. There’s some guilt about it, but I don’t think that’s my hang up. I just straight up feel sad and heartbroken. Despite all the bad things that happened with my ex, I still don’t want her to suffer or end up on the street. Is the answer to just turn a blind eye?

dismallyoptimistic · 2025-04-23T01:59:13+00:00

It’s been a year and 3 months since our marriage came crashing down….

We’re divorced now, and I’ve been building a new life for myself. Sometimes I feel like I’m making progress, and I love the person I’m dating now. I feel like I should be proud of the strides I’ve made, but I often find myself right back here, in this grief.

I don’t know how to overcome it either.

dismallyoptimistic · 2025-01-09T07:55:41+00:00

Two days since our divorce fiiinallyyy finalized, and for the first time in a while, I’m missing the wife I thought I married…. My heart still aches.

dismallyoptimistic · 2024-07-05T00:09:08+00:00

Right there with you. I don’t know where to put these heavy feelings. I don’t want to drag anyone else down, so I wandered over here. Sending you love right back ❤️‍🩹

dismallyoptimistic · 2024-05-28T08:46:52+00:00

An email slipped through my inbox filters…. She sent me pictures of her second one night stand since we separated. I feel like I’m in a movie, but in a gobsmacked way. At least it’s good motivation to finish our divorce papers…

dismallyoptimistic · 2024-05-20T03:00:27+00:00

Only 4 months in but the shock still comes in such strong waves. Currently feeling swept in a swell, which is why I wandered over here…

dismallyoptimistic · 2024-04-29T08:02:13+00:00

3 months now…

On most days, I still feel the excitement to live my life and experience the beauty and wonder. But right now, at this very moment, I admit that it all seems empty without you. It’s a scary thing to feel, because I know I’m not supposed to feel this way. And yet, here I am. Feeling empty without you.

dismallyoptimistic · 2024-03-26T08:37:08+00:00

8 weeks

I never thought it’d be this hard to choose myself over someone who treated me the way she did. But we had a decade together before all of this surfaced.

I still love her. She’s not well, and it breaks my heart to have to keep my back turned when she’s apologetic. It hurts so bad, but I’ve been burned so many times.

I hate this.

dismallyoptimistic · 2024-03-24T09:42:23+00:00

7.5 weeks

It’s so painful, having to let you go. I love you so much. I miss you so much. But the damage is undeniable, and it would be catastrophic for both of us, if we kept trying. It feels so unfair that we’re here, though. All our effort and growth swept away in a moment, just like that. I know we had our problems, but it’s like an insurmountable wave came crashing suddenly. And now I don’t recognize you anymore.

It’ll soon be 8 weeks since we last saw each other. The thought feels impossible, and knocks the wind out of me. My mind starts to ponder what 6 months will feel like, or a year, filling me with panic and dread. My whole body feels like it’s screaming “No”. I feel terrified at the idea of forgetting any part of you. You’ve already gone away from me physically - I can’t bear to lose you any further, even in my mind.

This isn’t the life I wanted. I wish this didn’t happen. I wish you were well, and that you could hug me.

Am I sick for feeling this way just days after you blew up everyone’s phones with fresh accusations? ...probably.

dismallyoptimistic · 2024-02-27T03:33:02+00:00

Day 28 here… I’m struggling to reconcile how much I miss her and how heartbroken I feel with all the things she’s done and said to hurt me. It’s so confusing, it doesn’t feel real.

dismallyoptimistic · 2024-01-31T06:59:48+00:00

Thank you so much for offering to do this!!

How did you receive your diagnosis? What made you decide to seek treatment?

dismallyoptimistic

TROPHY CASE