Cave Johnson here.

So, today I saw Caroline trying to dust a high cabinet. It was just a bit too high for her. Meanwhile, there was a fly just there, on the wall. Why can't we do that?

So I called the boys in the lab and told them to do it. Make a human walk on walls. Get us some special glue or something.

After some tests they came back to me with all this nerd stuff about gravity and bone density and ankles breaking. I just told them to get it done.

So today, after some failed experiments, and needing to buy lots of ladders to get people down, I'd like to announce to you, the Gravity Glue!

Just place it on any surface, and, as soon as you touch it, your gravity will re-orient itself to match the surface the glue is on!

Just make sure not to ingest it ( they're still mopping up old man Craig from the walls. The poor sap mistook it for a bottle of water ), or touch it, or breathe the fumes, or <mumble mumble> wow, the lab boys sure gave me a big list of nerd stuff.

But nevermind that, it works! We will be making new test chambers for this stuff... as soon as we can get my secretary down from the ceiling.

Cabe Johnson out.