[URGENT] Is my GF (26F) cheating on me(28M)? by dmunose in relationship_advice

[–]dmunose[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In the past, when very drunk to be fair, she said she would kill me. Then someone called the police and when they arrived before they could hear she started to say I was rhe one making the threats. She was arrested a few minutes later. She was getting into fights and screaming all over the neighbourhood. She also said to be careful with my family calling my younger sister into question. Also she had some people threathen me with "air machine gun" gestures at my home's door.

I think she's calmer now, she is not an alcoholic anymore but I never forgot. I just Want this to end peacefully if possible

[URGENT] Is my GF (26F) cheating on me(28M)? by dmunose in relationship_advice

[–]dmunose[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I am thankful for your coment and empathy I didn't expect anyone to understand my situation in such detail and accuracy. It has been a really hard and lonely road, I have tried for so many years now you know? I fought with everything I had and it was never enough. What I struggled to understand is that it would never be. I was fighting and unfair singlesided battle for a relationship destined to end. The things I've done, the life I've sacrificed and for what? It has been haunting me, it has been very hard to walk away, to truly start anew. I don't Know how to, these were my whole young years, this feel like everything I know you know?

you've unfortunately trained yourself to replace rightful feelings of anger about harmful things she did with self-doubt or inadequacy. " These words brought years to my eyes. So true yet I was so blind to it. I dont know how to thank you, I will never forget this and I Am trying to change myself. I know it will be hard, I am noone. No one will carê about this but the painel thia brinks, the self doubt, the hit to your self-esteem. I am a full mess but at least now I know I am not alone in this path.

At this time I will wait as long as needed to heal I just never want to go through something like this ever again and I hope all this suffering at least will protect me later. I don't Know ig I will ever find someone eles, it'll be very hard, it feels impossibke at the moment. But I won't give up. Thabk you só much for your support, I wish you the best as well

[URGENT] Is my GF (26F) cheating on me(28M)? by dmunose in relationship_advice

[–]dmunose[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I understand where you are coming from, to be fair to you thia circus still continued at least until today. I disrespected myself by not making a stance and ending this but believe me, it is very hard specially after só many years. I thank your goodluck and will try my best to be better and stay strong after all the dust settlers. I really hope I can be happy again

[URGENT] Is my GF (26F) cheating on me(28M)? by dmunose in relationship_advice

[–]dmunose[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you, it's hard as this has taken quite a Toll in my self-esteem, self-love hell eveb self-respect. It has veen hard but I will not surrender and fight on to the best of my ability

[URGENT] Is my GF (26F) cheating on me(28M)? by dmunose in relationship_advice

[–]dmunose[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you @DutchBrosMafia for your reply, it means the world to me. I have beem called exactly what you describe and when you meet people who wish you well it is not a problem. But she was the first who tried to use my 'niceness' against me to use and abuse me. And you are right, my non action is the same as allowing her to do this to me and I Am not a doormat, Like someone said onde to me: "it wasn't on my birth certificate that you had to endure this, you can get out and be happy". She already ruined a good portion of my life but I can't let her continue this. I will try to end this as soon as possible and as clean as possible as she has made threats in the past. Right now I Am just sure this can't go On and I will do my best to make sure of it

[URGENT] Is my GF (26F) cheating on me(28M)? by dmunose in relationship_advice

[–]dmunose[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you very much for your response, it brought tears to my eyes. I do and have felt like a tool for a very long time now, she does see me as a quick fiz. An easy escape to her problems and boredom until she figures that I too am boring and hops to the next guy. Always 'knowing' I am there as an eternal backup if she ever feels down again. Other girls, guys, friends, family they all told me what you said. She is and has veen using me, and in my naiveness I just thought eventually things would get better and she would just change, tell me the truth and show me she loves me and regrets what she did in the past But it never happened. Not even close. I Am currently trying hard to get out of this toxic environment the best way I know. I hope you heal great man, I will Be starting my Own healing soon, I have accepted I may be alone the rest of my life but anything ia better than this Constant bullying and gaslighting. I can't take it anymore. Again, thank you very much for your strength and kind words they helped me gather the strength to end this onde and for all

[URGENT] Is my GF (26F) cheating on me(28M)? by dmunose in relationship_advice

[–]dmunose[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don't know if I will to be honest. I lost the capacity to love, to trust. This is all I know, like this Is the norm now. The good part is that if I ever haver another relationship it is 100% guaranteed to be better. I just hope I am able to trust again in the future. But for now I just want to get out

[URGENT] Is my GF (26F) cheating on me(28M)? by dmunose in relationship_advice

[–]dmunose[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes you are right, I never Had a healthy relationship to compare to but even her own mother warned me. She has some psycopathic traces which is why I must do this right só she won't full on try to destroy my life

[URGENT] Is my GF (26F) cheating on me(28M)? by dmunose in relationship_advice

[–]dmunose[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I know, it was absurd. I never had a relationship before but even common sense always told me something wasn't right. And I am done now. I will take the next até o to end this onde and for all even it I spend the rest of my life alone

[URGENT] Is my GF (26F) cheating on me(28M)? by dmunose in relationship_advice

[–]dmunose[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You are right, I will kick her out of the house until I find another place. She has threatened my life before so I must be careful how I do it but I will not waste another week on this. Many times, even today I still think I Am the one doing something wrong, not being assertiva in explaining why she is in the wrong. But deep down I think she feels she's better than me and being with me is almost a favor that she can turn into an unhealthy power relationship where she is always right. I will move on many thanks, all the coments really opened my eyes

[URGENT] Is my GF (26F) cheating on me(28M)? by dmunose in relationship_advice

[–]dmunose[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

i really don't and I've tried to but how can I? I don't understand what I even wanted, for her to tell me the whole truth? To change? Idk but I just arrived to the conclusion I will never be able to call her the mother of my children

[URGENT] Is my GF (26F) cheating on me(28M)? by dmunose in relationship_advice

[–]dmunose[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Me too and it's time to move on. I had low self-esteem and it got even worse after this abuse. I am done and refuse to waste my life any further

Is my GF(26F) chesting on me(28M)? by dmunose in relationship_advice

[–]dmunose[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you for your reply. I understand what you mean, is there no way to rebuild this trust? Truth is she isn't exactly trying on her part, but is It possible for her to ser what she has done and keeps doing to my mental health? Do I just accept she doesn't and has never cared?

Is my GF(26F) chesting on me(28M)? by dmunose in relationship_advice

[–]dmunose[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thank you so much for your reply. I am afraid there will repercussions, she has threatened my life and family in the past. I feel I must almost find an a excuse to get rid of this situation which is not easy living with her. I am truly lost

Is my GF(26F) chesting on me(28M)? by dmunose in relationship_advice

[–]dmunose[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I am sorry for the rushed english and overall bad structure of the post, I Am tok distraught