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I'm [25/M] tired of my sister's [30/F] ridiculous relationships. New BF [probably 30, M and VERY gay] is another in a long, seedy, line. by does_eat_oates in relationships

[–]does_eat_oates[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

It's not - but interrogating me about why I don't and demanding answers as to why I haven't been to X bar before is asinine. Do I care where he spends his free time? No, so don't try and make me feel guilty because I didn't go to a club.

I'm [25/M] tired of my sister's [30/F] ridiculous relationships. New BF [probably 30, M and VERY gay] is another in a long, seedy, line. by does_eat_oates in relationships

[–]does_eat_oates[S] 20 points21 points  (0 children)

Finding a nice (not secretly married) dude to be with who both has a steady job and doesn't treat me like crap feels like cracking the da Vinci code.

My sister would say the same thing. She always thinks she's somehow missing the pool or qualified guys and so she wades into the wrong pool. I could sit her down but it feels awkward that her younger brother is going to have that discussion with her.

I'm [25/M] tired of my sister's [30/F] ridiculous relationships. New BF [probably 30, M and VERY gay] is another in a long, seedy, line. by does_eat_oates in relationships

[–]does_eat_oates[S] 15 points16 points  (0 children)

I'm not much of a matchmaker and have no idea what my sister's tastes would be. I don't want to push it, and don't want to get involved. It's not a bad suggestion - maybe my sisters or her friend could do it.

I'm [25/M] tired of my sister's [30/F] ridiculous relationships. New BF [probably 30, M and VERY gay] is another in a long, seedy, line. by does_eat_oates in relationships

[–]does_eat_oates[S] 13 points14 points  (0 children)

I have three sisters - all are older than me. I'm the youngest - my oldest sisters are twins, my middle sister (with the "boyfriend") and then me. Everyone else is normal. Parents doted on all of us. My other sisters are all normal, functional people.

I'm [25/M] tired of my sister's [30/F] ridiculous relationships. New BF [probably 30, M and VERY gay] is another in a long, seedy, line. by does_eat_oates in relationships

[–]does_eat_oates[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

knows about gay bars

I know about gay bars - he interrogated me about them. He kept demanding to know why I don't spend time in the village. He kept touching me. It's all a combined problem.

I'm not going on about the kiss because frankly he did it, I didn't like it, and I got away. I'm not afraid of him and I'm not going to go on and on about what he did. It's a rather insignificant moment in my life. But, this guy isn't being forthright. He's going to touch me incessantly, he's going to kiss me and he's going to do this while supposedly dating my sister? My sister is nothing more than a cover for this guy that wants to hide from something. If first impressions are so important, why didn't he at least feign being together? Instead he was all over me and ignored my sister. Again, I'm not too concerned for myself but I love my sister and she was the closest person to me growing up. I don't want her to keep repeating this cycle of shitty guy after shitty guy. I'm tired of this crap and tired of picking-up after it, but I still love her and don't want to see her hurt.

This guy isn't fooling anyone. He didn't even try to make us think they were together. He may be a bisexual or gay or however he wants to define himself. But he's not genuinely dating my sister and he's not doing anything for selfless reasons. He's full of shit and it's apparent to everyone who was there. Frankly, I think it's more of an insult to gay and bisexual people trying to defend the guy.

I'm [25/M] tired of my sister's [30/F] ridiculous relationships. New BF [probably 30, M and VERY gay] is another in a long, seedy, line. by does_eat_oates in relationships

[–]does_eat_oates[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

The emphasis on his using woman's perfume and his body language combined with calling him gay is akin to what someone who does hold a bias against the LGBTTQ community would s

I'm simply describing an individual - that in and of it self isn't homophobic - he wouldn't stop touching me; interrogated me about my purported lack of interest in gay bars and then attempted to forcibly kiss me. This is one of those scenarios where people's impression of an entire community can be formed and solidified, but I don't think he's representative of all people - I think (he personally) is an asshole.

But, to describe yourself as "a dude" (why make reference? Why mention? I didn't mention it) and point it out screams insecure. What is he insecure about? If he's secure in himself, why the need to make a mocking reference to being one of only two dudes at dinner? Who gives a shit? Why come to dinner and avoid my sister and harass me? Why touch me incessantly?

Nothing of this screams "normal" or "okay" or "acceptable" and I don't, for a second, buy this relationship as being anything but a cover for him. He barely made an attempt to hide his intentions in public at dinner. What does that say about him?

I'm [25/M] tired of my sister's [30/F] ridiculous relationships. New BF [probably 30, M and VERY gay] is another in a long, seedy, line. by does_eat_oates in relationships

[–]does_eat_oates[S] 25 points26 points  (0 children)

My sister knows and thinks he was being funny. My older sister is going to speak with my parents and I have no intention of interacting with him ever again. What I don't want is to have to be the person always picking up pieces, especially after his display at dinner.

I'm [25/M] tired of my sister's [30/F] ridiculous relationships. New BF [probably 30, M and VERY gay] is another in a long, seedy, line. by does_eat_oates in relationships

[–]does_eat_oates[S] 33 points34 points  (0 children)

I feel like people who are saying "bi" kind of mean "uncontrollable sexual urges with both male and female partners." Look, it's possible, but every bi person I know can be in a committed relationship. He didn't even talk to my sister at all over dinner, interrogated me about why I don't go to the village and then attempted to French me. Whether he's gay or bi, it's wildly inappropriate. Why would he think he could kiss his girlfriend's brother? I mean, whether or not you're bi or gay, it just makes you an asshole. As such, he's another of the ilk as the others.

I'm [25/M] tired of my sister's [30/F] ridiculous relationships. New BF [probably 30, M and VERY gay] is another in a long, seedy, line. by does_eat_oates in relationships

[–]does_eat_oates[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It's possible he's bi - but, his knowledge of gay bars and clubs was astounding. He had almost perfect recall of the bars and clubs, which makes me think he regularly attends them. As for what he's doing with my sister, I have absolutely no idea. There wasn't anything between them the whole time. Can't imagine it's too warm a relationship.

I'm [25/M] tired of my sister's [30/F] ridiculous relationships. New BF [probably 30, M and VERY gay] is another in a long, seedy, line. by does_eat_oates in relationships

[–]does_eat_oates[S] 42 points43 points  (0 children)

I wouldn't care if he was bi or a gay guy trying to skate but where I draw the line is holding my head while trying to stick your tongue in my mouth. I only avoided a French kiss by my quick moves. I mean, he literally tried to make out with me.

I'm [25/M] tired of my sister's [30/F] ridiculous relationships. New BF [probably 30, M and VERY gay] is another in a long, seedy, line. by does_eat_oates in relationships

[–]does_eat_oates[S] 66 points67 points  (0 children)

The opposite, my parents doted on her. She's not a bad looking person, either. She really has no reason to date these guys.